Lanie Parish: No signs of struggle. He knew her. Even brought her flowers. Who said romance is dead?
Kate Beckett: I do, every Saturday night.
Lanie Parish: A little lipstick wouldn't hurt.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Castle: When I was your age... I can't tell that story, it's wildly inappropriate, which oddly is my point. Don't you want to have wildly inappropriate stories that you can't tell your children?
Alexis: I think you have enough of those for the both of us.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Castle: Life should be an adventure. Do you want to know why I killed Derek? There were no more surprises. I knew exactly what was going to happen every moment of every scene. It's just like these parties they become so predictable, 'I'm your biggest fan, where do you get your ideas'.
Alexis: And the ever popular 'will you sign my chest'
Castle: That one I don't mind so much.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Ryan: [pointing to inscription on Castle's book] From the library of Katherine Beckett.
Beckett: Do you have a problem with reading, Ryan?
Esposito: Yo, check it, girl, you're totally a fan!
Beckett: Right. Of the genre.
Ryan: Right, the genre, that's why you're blushing.
Beckett: What are you, twelve?

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Beckett: Half of the guys are waiting for prints. You don't just jump the line.
Castle: Oh, I think somebody feels threatened.
Beckett: I'm not threatened.
Castle: No, no, I get it. I can call the mayor and you can't.
Beckett: We have procedure. Protocol.
Castle: Yeah, and you always come to a complete stop at a red light and you never fudge your taxes. Tell me something: do you ever have any fun? Let your hair down? Drop your top? A little "cops gone wild"?
Beckett: You do know that I'm wearing a gun?
Castle: Oooh.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Rick Castle: You want to know why I killed Derrick? There were no more surprises. I knew exactly what was going to happen every moment of every scene. It's just like these parties. They become so predictable. "I'm your biggest fan." "Where do you get your ideas?"
Alexis Castle: And the ever popular, "Will you sign my chest?"
Rick Castle: That one I don't mind so much.
Alexis Castle: Yeah, well, FYI, I do.
Rick Castle: Just once I want someone to come up to me and say something new.
Kate Beckett: Mr. Castle?
Rick Castle: [turns and holds out his pen] Where would you like it?
Kate Beckett: Detective Kate Beckett, NYPD. We need to ask you a few questions about a murder that took place earlier tonight.
Alexis Castle: [takes pen from Castle] That's new.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Kate Beckett: Mr. Castle, you have quite a rapsheet for a bestselling author. Disorderly conduct, resisting arrest...
Rick Castle: Boys will be boys.
Kate Beckett: Says here you stole a police horse?
Rick Castle: Borrowed.
Kate Beckett: And you were nude at the time?
Rick Castle: It was spring.
Kate Beckett: And every time the charges were dropped.
Rick Castle: What can I say? The mayor's a fan. But if it makes you feel better, I'd be happy to let you spank me.
Kate Beckett: Mr. Castle, this whole bad boy charm thing that you've got going might work with bimbettes and celebutantes. Me? I work for a living. So that makes you one of two things in my world. Either the guy who makes my life easier or the guy who makes my life harder. And trust me, you do not want to be the guy who makes my life harder.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Kate Beckett: Why are you here? You don't care about the victims, so you aren't here for justice. You don't care that the guy's aping your books, so you aren't here 'cause you're outraged. So what is it, Rick? Are you here to annoy me?
Rick Castle: I'm here for the story.
Kate Beckett: The story?
Rick Castle: Why those people? Why those murders?
Kate Beckett: Sometimes there is no story. Sometimes the guy is just a psychopath.
Rick Castle: There's always a story, always a chain of events that makes everything make sense. Take you, for example. Under normal circumstances, you should not be here. Most smart, good-looking women become lawyers, not cops. And yet, here you are. Why?
Kate Beckett: I don't know, Rick. You're the novelist. You tell me.
Rick Castle: Well, you're not bridge and tunnel. No trace of the boroughs when you talk, so that means Manhattan, that means money. You went to college, probably a pretty good one. You had options. Yeah, you had lots of options, better options, more socially acceptable options, and you still chose this. That tells me something happened. Not to you. No, you're wounded, but you're not that wounded. No, it was somebody you cared about. It was someone you loved. And you probably could have lived with that, but the person responsible was never caught. [realizing he overstepped] And that, Detective Beckett, is why you're here.
Kate Beckett: Cute trick. Don't think you know me.
Rick Castle: The point is, there's always a story. You just have to find it.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Kate Beckett: Sir, he is like a nine-year-old on a sugar rush, totally incapable of taking anything seriously.
Roy Montgomery: But he did help solve this case. And when the mayor's happy, the commissioner's happy. And when the commissioner's happy, I'm happy.
Kate Beckett: How long, sir?
Roy Montgomery: It's up to him.

  --  Flowers For Your Grave [1.1]
%
Police rep: Mr. Castle, be advised: if you get injured following Detective Beckett to research your next novel, you cannot sue the city. If you get shot, you cannot sue the city. If you get killed...
Rick Castle: My lifeless remains cannot sue the city?
Police rep: Your heirs, Mr. Castle.

  --  Nanny McDead [1.2]
%
Kate Beckett: Exactly how much longer do I have to expect you to be shadowing me on my cases like this?
Rick Castle: Hard to say. When I'm writing a new character, there's no telling when inspiration might strike.
Kate Beckett: I thought I was your inspiration.
Rick Castle: Oh, you are, Detective. And in so many ways.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, well your inspiration might strike you sooner than you think.

  --  Nanny McDead [1.2]
%
Rick Castle: Why only run the workers' names? Why not run all the neighbors names?
Kate Beckett: What are you basing that on?
Rick Castle: I'm basing that on the neighbor would make a better story. No, come on. What do any of us know about our neighbors in this city? You think the guy living next door to the Son of Sam knew he was living next door to the Son of Sam?
Roy Montgomery: He's right. Neighbors in Berkowitz's building had no idea was the Son of Sam killer.
Rick Castle: Thank you. What about the guy in 8B?
Kate Beckett: Who?
Rick Castle: 8B. Quiet guy. You see him every day, only you never notice him. But he noticed Sara. She's young, beautiful, the kind of girl that a guy like him would never have a chance with. We all know girls like that don't we? Well, at first, it's just a game. Figure out her schedule. When does she do her laundry? When is she alone? Until it becomes something more, something that he can't control. Well, he uses the stairs, obviously, to avoid the elevator's cameras. And then he just waits, concealed in the shadows. When she comes into that laundry room, he pounces. When he looked into her vacant, lifeless eyes, he wanted to tell her he never meant to kill her. All he ever wanted was to be noticed. That's when he felt the heat of that dryer on his skin. So he picks up her limp body in his arms and gently places it inside. He almost smiled at his good fortune when he found the quarter in his pocket, slipping it into the slot. Buying him the time to do what he does best ... Disappear. [pauses, then continues] Just saying, better story. Coffee?
Roy Montgomery: Let see what we can find out about those neighbors. [starts to walk away but turns back briefly] And someone better tell me who the hell lives in 8B!

  --  Nanny McDead [1.2]
%
Alexis Castle: So, who got killed today?
Rick Castle: The nanny.
Alexis Castle: Do they know who did it?
Rick Castle: Well, apparently, in an actual homicide, they don't know who did it until after the guy gets caught.

  --  Nanny McDead [1.2]
%
Kate Beckett: Exactly how many times have you been married, Castle?
Rick Castle: Twice.
Kate Beckett: That's it?
Rick Castle: Isn't that enough? How about you?
Kate Beckett: Me? No, never been.
Rick Castle: Really?
Kate Beckett: Yep.
Rick Castle: You'd be good at it. You're both controlling and disapproving.

  --  Nanny McDead [1.2]
%
Castle: Reading the paper? You are going to lose all of your wired teen hyper texting nano gizmo street cred.
Alexis: I'm a rebel. I kick it old school.

  --  Hedge Fund Homeboys [1.3]
%
Castle: Style section. Anything I need to know?
Alexis: The '70s are back.
Castle: Hmm. They're like the Highlander, they just won't die.

  --  Hedge Fund Homeboys [1.3]
%
Castle: What's the class?
Martha: Introduction to life coaching. It's... it's always been my desire to make a difference, whether on stage or off. And I have had cards made, haha.
Castle: It says here I'm your client.
Martha: Well of course you are, haven't I been telling you what to do your whole life?

  --  Hedge Fund Homeboys [1.3]
%
Beckett: Do you know the school?
Castle: Oh, I've been kicked out of all of New York's finer educational institutions at least once. The irony is, now that I'm rich and famous, they all claim me as alum and want money.
Beckett: [sarcastically] It is just so rough being you.
Castle: My cross to bear.

  --  Hedge Fund Homeboys [1.3]
%
Castle: Do you do drugs?
Alexis: No.
Castle: Are you sure? 'Cause you can tell me.
Alexis: Dad, am I lethargic and uncharacteristically irritable?
Castle: No.
Alexis: Are my eyes bloodshot for no apparent reason?
Castle: No, except when you're sick.
Alexis: Well, that's an apparent reason.
Castle: Right.

  --  Hedge Fund Homeboys [1.3]
%
Ryan: You're telling me you've lived in New York your whole life, and you've never scored a piece of roadkill?
Esposito: "Roadkill?"
Ryan: It's an accepted practice, bro. You're done with your old stuff, you leave it on the street for those less fortunate. Artists, students, former hedge-fund managers... it's trickle-down economics at its finest.
Esposito: Yeah, well I prefer not to be trickled on.
Ryan: [grinning] You know that red couch I have? The one you like so much?
Esposito: Don't you say it, bro.
Ryan: 54th and Lex.
Esposito: That's gross. Gross. We are never playing Madden at your place again.

  --  Hell Hath No Fury [1.4]
%
Beckett: [interrogating a suspect] Witnesses don't place you at the club until one in the morning, and Horn was murdered somewhere between eleven and twelve.
Castle: [watching Beckett from behind one-way glass] Here it comes, and...
Beckett: So, where were you between eleven and twelve, Mr. Creason?
Castle: Booyah.
Creason: I was asleep.
Castle: Asleep!? You are lame! [heard from other side of glass] 

  --  Hell Hath No Fury [1.4]
%
[Talking to Alexis about the case while chopping onions]
Alexis: I don't get it. If Creason didn't do it, then how does the rug fit in?
Castle: Killer probably heard about the feud between the two of them and tried to shift suspicion, which is stupid, because without the rug, it would've just looked like a mugging gone wrong.
Alexis: So by trying to look smart, they were actually being stupid.
Castle: I think you just described the human condition.

  --  Hell Hath No Fury [1.4]
%
Lanie: Getting a drink with me after work instead of getting your freak on with writer boy?
Beckett: Yeah, well he is annoying, self-centered, egotistical, and completely-
Lanie: Fun. And take it from me, girlfriend, you need some fun. I mean, how bad can he be?
Beckett: [answers phone] Beckett.
Castle: [excitedly] Guess who's got a date with a prostitute!

  --  Hell Hath No Fury [1.4]
%
[Alexis walking in as Castle is working]
Alexis: Hey.
Castle: Hey. Finished your homework?
Alexis: Yeah.
Castle: You wanna finish mine?
Alexis: Well, that depends. How much you offering to pay me?
Castle: Oh, I taught you well.

  --  Hell Hath No Fury [1.4]
%
Beckett: [about a frozen body] She's melting.
Castle: Maybe we should be looking for ruby slippers.

  --  A Chill Goes Through Her Veins [1.5]
%
[After finding out the victim's husband was shot in a mugging]
Esposito: Yeah. What are the odds?
Castle: Long, unless they're connected.
Esposito: Well, four years between murders. One's a popsicle, one just got popped. How could they possibly be connected?
Castle: Maybe he and his wife got into something they couldn't get out of. Maybe something to do with a drug habit.
Ryan: So some skell waits four years to finish the job?
Castle: Maybe he finally figured out what happened to his wife and was about to go the police with it.
Ryan: I don't believe it.
Castle: Give me 250 pages, I bet I could make you.
Beckett: We're solving a murder, Castle, not writing a book.
Castle: I would call it, A Chill Runs Through Her Veins.
Esposito: Ooh, I like that.
Castle : Heh! [Two slap hands] "Bam" said the lady, another bestseller for me.

  --  A Chill Goes Through Her Veins [1.5]
%
Castle: All right, so you and I are married.
Beckett: We are not married.
Castle: Relax, it's just pretend.
Beckett: I don't wanna pretend.
Castle: Scared you'll like it?
Beckett: Okay, if we're married, I want a divorce.
Roger: Are you two like this all the time?
Castle & Beckett: Yes.

  --  A Chill Goes Through Her Veins [1.5]
%
[parked outside the home of a grandfather who killed his daughter's murderer]
Castle: You could just leave it like this. Sam's dead. The captain's happy. Those kids look pretty happy.
Beckett: That's the difference between a novel and the real world, Castle. A cop doesn't get to decide how the story ends.

  --  A Chill Goes Through Her Veins [1.5]
%
Beckett: This is for the life that I saved [pointing at the watch on her left arm which belongs to her father]. And. This is for the life that I lost [picking at the ring which belongs to her dead mother].

  --  A Chill Goes Through Her Veins [1.5]
%
[Talking about the case while staring in a refrigerator]
Alexis: If I was putting a body in a freezer, it'd be because I was trying to hide it.
Castle : Until you stop paying for the storage space.
Alexis: Did I stop, or did something stop me?
[Castle turns toward Alexis in realization while she shrugs]
Castle: [closing the refrigerator] It's family moments like these I will never forget.
Alexis : [scoffing] With a good therapist, hopefully, I will.

  --  A Chill Goes Through Her Veins [1.5]
%
Castle: I had sex with my ex-wife this morning. My first ex-wife. Meredith, Alexis' mom. And she's thinking about moving back to New York. Do you know what that would mean to me? That would be a very special brand of hell. The hell of a deep-fried Twinkie.
Ryan: A deep-fried Twinkie?
Castle: Yeah. The guilty pleasure that you know is bad for you so you only do it once, maybe twice a year for the novelty,
Ryan and Esposito: Ah!
Castle: But a deep-fried Twinkie everyday is... [gags]
Beckett: Castle!
Castle: What?
Beckett: Crime scene. Dead body. A little respect here.
Castle: I don't think he can hear me.
Beckett: Okay, how about a little self-respect then?
Castle: Fine.

  --  Always Buy Retail [1.6]
%
Beckett: If she's so bad, then why did you sleep with her this morning?
Castle: Let me tell you something about crazy people. The sex is unbelievable.
Beckett: How shallow are you?
Castle: Very.

  --  Always Buy Retail [1.6]
%
[Meredith makes a surprise at the precinct]
Castle: [introducing the team] Meredith, these are Detectives Ryan, Esposito and Detective Beckett.
Meredith: Oh, Beckett. Your new muse. Alexis told me all about it, and I simply had to stop by. You know, I was his inspiration once.
Beckett: Were you, now?
Meredith: Still am, from time to time. Right, kitten?
Beckett: [grinning] Kitten?
[Ryan and Esposito snicker in the back]
Castle: I had this dream once, only I was naked and far less embarrassed.

  --  Always Buy Retail [1.6]
%
Castle: We're looking for a yoga studio nearby with a class that ended about 3:00.
Beckett: Maybe the woman was on her way to yoga class.
Castle: You ever try doing a half-moon pose cranked up on caffeine? Completely throws off your chi.

  --  Always Buy Retail [1.6]
%
[hiding behind a kitchen island while getting shot at]
Beckett: [to Castle] Just stay down!
Castle: You stay down!
Beckett: I can't shoot him from down here.
Castle: Yeah, and he can't shoot you either!

  --  Always Buy Retail [1.6]
%
Castle: How often are people killed in neighborhoods like this?
Beckett: Same as anywhere else Castle. Just the once.

  --  Home Is Where The Heart Stops [1.7]
%
Ryan: Why do you writers always call them "perps?"
Castle: Isn't that what you call them?
Ryan: Ah, we've got a whole lot of names for them. Pipehead, pisshead, orc, creep...
Esposito: ...crook, knucklehead, chucklehead...
Ryan: ...chud, turd...
Esposito: ...destro, scall...
Ryan: ...skexy, slicko, slick...
Esposito: ...mope...
Ryan: ...sleestak...
Castle: [writing in notepad] Slow down, slow down!
Beckett: Suspects. We call them suspects.
Montgomery: I'm old-school. I like dirtbag.
Castle: Classic!

  --  Home Is Where The Heart Stops [1.7]
%
Castle: [shouting over Beckett's gunfire] Wouldn't it be more of a challenge if they weren't standing still?!
Beckett: [stops shooting] OK Castle, you show me how it's done.
Castle: Whoo!
Beckett: All yours. [Castle clears his throat as he takes a one handed stance with his right hand] It's not a duel, Scaramouche. [Beckett turns Castle around] Here. Square off of the target. Feet shoulder distance apart. OK, gauntlet your right fist in your left palm.
Castle: [Castle accidentally fires into the wall] Oh! Shot too soon.
Beckett: Yeah, well, you know we could always just cuddle, Castle.
Castle: Oh, funny, and a smile. Good. [Castle fires again, missing the target]
Beckett: [sounding dubious] Well, that's better.
Castle: Hmm. You know I, uh, came down to ask you if I could, uhh, take home some of those stolen property photos.
Beckett: Photos of the jewellery? Why?
Castle: I dunno, I just thought it might spark something. [shoots again, hitting the target in the groin area] Oooh! That kinda hurt!
Beckett: Tell you what. You put any of the next three in the ten ring and I will give you the files.
Castle: Yeah?
Beckett: Yeah.
[Castle quickly fires three shots right in the 10 ring. Beckett stares at the target, stunned, then glares at Castle.]
Castle: [smugly] You're a very good teacher.

  --  Home Is Where The Heart Stops [1.7]
%
Beckett: The next time you show up at a crime scene without me, I'll show you how my taser works.
Castle: Promise?

  --  Home Is Where The Heart Stops [1.7]
%
Alexis: My, dad, nervous for a date?
Castle: It's not a date - it's an undercover operation.
Martha: I don't know why you won't tell me where the party is.
Castle: Because you'll show up.

  --  Home Is Where The Heart Stops [1.7]
%
Javier Esposito: If you don't mind me saying, Mrs. R., you fold a lot.
Martha Rodgers: I just don't believe in stringing along a bad hand. Why waste time?
Rick Castle: Actually, Mother's game isn't really Texas Hold 'Em. It's strip poker. Keeps things humming along, if you know what I mean.
Martha Rodgers: Well, frankly, I prefer strip because even when you lose, you win.

  --  Ghosts [1.8]
%
Susan Mailer: It's not hard to live like a ghost when everyone you love thinks you're dead. I never contacted anyone from my former life, not even my parents.
Kate Beckett: But you still sent money to the Pikes.
Susan Mailer: They had a son, medical bills. I, I was responsible. Everything could have stayed just the way it was, except...
Rick Castle: Except Cynthia decided to write a book.
Susan Mailer: That reporter put a post on an environmental board asking for info on Cynthia. I e-mailed, pretending to be an old friend of "the group." It didn't take long for me to figure out that she had found Cynthia, and Cynthia was lying about what happened on the ship.
Kate Beckett: You tracked her down. You confronted her.
Susan Mailer: I threatened to turn myself in if she went through with the book. Give myself up, tell the authorities everything. She begged to meet with me first. Somewhere we could talk.
Rick Castle: That's when you rented the room?
Susan Mailer: Oh, no. Cynthia rented the room, not me. It was all part of her plan.
Kate Beckett: Her plan?
Susan Mailer: Her plan to murder me. When I got there, she poured me a drink. "Let's toast to old friends," she said. Only, you see, I don't drink. I tried to leave. She wouldn't let me. I hid in the bathroom. That's when I saw it. The tub. Full of oil. Then I understood.
Rick Castle: She didn't plan to talk to you. She planned to kill you and make it look like suicide. That wine was laced with a sleeping pill. You were supposed to drink it, and then drown in the oil.
Kate Beckett: And then the world would think that you were wracked with guilt over the Pikes all these years, and that you finally decided to commit suicide.
Rick Castle: Once your body was discovered, the public would clamor for the true story, Cynthia's true story, with you now cast as the villain.
Susan Mailer: We struggled. She lost her balance and fell against the sink and hit her head. I should've called for help. But I just wanted it to be over. So I, I dragged her to the tub, and I ... I pushed her in. You see, I was already dead. I just wanted to keep it that way.

  --  Ghosts [1.8]
%
Kate Beckett: I'm gonna make you hurt.
Rick Castle: Oh, you're gonna get hurt.
Kate Beckett: What are we playing for?
Rick Castle: Pride. Or clothing.

  --  Ghosts [1.8]
%
Rick Castle: So what did you think of your alter ego, Nikki? Pretty sweet, right?
Kate Beckett: Sweet? She's naked!
Rick Castle: She's not naked! She's holding a gun. Strategically.

  --  Little Girl Lost [1.9]
%
Will Sorenson: You never told him how you stood in line for an hour just to get your book signed? How his novels got you through your mother's death?
Kate Beckett: Is there anything you don't remember?
Will Sorenson: Not when it comes to you.

  --  Little Girl Lost [1.9]
%
Alfred Candela: Why would you do this? Why would you put us through that? I mean, for godsake, why not just divorce me?
Theresa Candela: Oh, so that you can sue me for alimony? So that you can get half of everything? So that you can get custody of Angela because I'm at work all day and you can "be there for her"? No. I've seen what happens to the guys at work, what happened to Doug Ellers. No way was that gonna happen to me.
Richard Castle: You were paying the ransom to yourself.
Theresa Candela: Once Angela returned, I would file for the papers. There would be nothing left for him to take.
Kate Beckett: And if Angela was kidnapped when Alfred was taking care of her, then...
Theresa Candela: The lawyer said that if I could prove him negligent, I would get custody. I wouldn't have to move out of the apartment that I paid for so that he could live here with my daughter. Do you know how hard it was to adopt her? How much it cost? Ten years! [to Alfred] How many paintings have you sold, Alfred? Huh? How many?
Alfred Candela: How could you hate me so much?
Theresa Candela: You made it easy.

  --  Little Girl Lost [1.9]
%
Richard Castle: He's like the male you. Yin needs Yang, not another Yin. Yin-Yang is harmony. Yin-Yin is... a name for a panda.
Kate Beckett: Any more wisdom, Obi-Wan?

  --  Little Girl Lost [1.9]
%
Beckett: I'm not running a background check on your daughter's date.
Castle: Oh, come on! She says he's quiet, he keeps to himself, and he lives with his parents. Tell me that doesn't sound like a serial killer to you!

  --  A Death in the Family [1.10]
%
[Beckett and Castle find the plastic surgeon's office; she and Castle walk past a well-endowed woman; Castle stares]
Beckett: Well, this must be the place. [clears throat] What is it with men and boobs, anyway?
Castle: Biological. We can't help it.
Beckett: But doesn't it bother you that they're so obviously not real?
Castle: Santa's not real. We still love opening his presents.

  --  A Death in the Family [1.10]
%
Martha: Nothing you can say will change how we feel. What men don't understand is the right clothes, the right shoes, the right make up, it hides the flaws we think we have, and make us look beautiful to our selves, that's what makes us look beautiful to others.
Castle: Used to be all she needed to feel beautiful was a pink tutu and a plastic tiara.
Martha: We spend our whole lives trying to feel that way again.

  --  A Death in the Family [1.10]
%
Castle: [Regarding Alexis' date] Boy, I can't believe my little girl's going to prom... my only comfort now is the long-standing tradition of torturing the boyfriend.
Beckett: What do you mean?
Castle: You know, the time-honored hazing that goes on in those few moments we share, where he and I are alone, just before my daughter descends the stairs.
Ryan: I remember the terror of meeting my date's old man.
Castle: What did he do?
Ryan: Checked my wallet for condoms, showed me his gun collection, my hands were shaking so bad I could barely put on the corsage.
Castle: [to Beckett] What'd your dad do?
Beckett: [pause] I... I don't know. I was in my room.
Castle: How was your date when you finally came out?
Beckett: You know what actually, now that you mention it, he looked terrified. [Castle and Ryan nod] And this whole time I though he was scared of me.
Castle: Nope! And now it's my turn...
Ryan: What are you planning?
Castle: Something befitting the name of 'Castle'...

  --  A Death in the Family [1.10]
%
Castle: [Trying to convince Beckett that she isn't to blame for Sorenson being shot] You think this is your fault? Yeah, you pushed for it. Not because it's your job, but because you care. Most people come up against a wall, they give up. Not you. You don't let go. You don't back down. That's what makes you extraordinary.

  --  A Death in the Family [1.10]
%
Esposito: [About the bachelor-party cop twins' uniforms at the photo shoot] Hey, Beckett, how come you don't wear a uniform like that?
Beckett: Because I don't want to be paid in singles.

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Ryan: Guy in a tree; Mom and Dad bickering. Seems like old times!
Esposito: Mm-hmm!

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Beckett: [to Lanie who is examining a body in a tree] How's it going up there?
Lanie: I got tree branches poking my boobs and a spotlight shining up my booty.
Esposito: Could be worse. You could be wearing a skirt.
Lanie: [pause] When I get down there, I'mma smack you.
Esposito: Looking forward to that.

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Castle: [About what he found about Beckett's mother] What was I suppose to do? Not tell her what I found?
Lanie: [Surprised] What you found?
Castle: Oh she didn't tell you, did she? Three people were killed the same way her mother was, right about the same time. One of them was a former law student of hers, another one a documents clerk, the third one a lawyer for a non-profit.
Lanie: Wait, the M.E. at the time didn't make the connection?
Castle: If he did, he buried it.
Lanie: Did you talk to him?
Castle: He died four years ago. So you see why I had to tell her.

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Lanie: [examining Castle after the car crash] He'll live.
Ryan: What no brain damage?
Lanie: If he has some, it happened way before tonight and was probably self inflicted.
Castle: Ahh, good times.

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Esposito: You know what I don't get? Who would steal a dead body?
Castle: Oh, plenty of people. Organ harvesters, cadaver-less med students, Satanists. [pause] Mad scientists looking to create their own monster.
Beckett: Or the guys who killed him might have left some evidence behind.
Castle: Boring. How about a spy having swallowed a microchip that the enemy spies murder him over before the CIA can get ahold of him?

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Castle: You want me to put on some music? Whenever they do this sort of thing on CSI, they always do it to music in poorly lit rooms. Kinda reminds me of porn.

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Beckett: *in a Russian accent* Sometimes when I am bored, I go to Glechik Cafe in Little Odessa and pretend to be Muscovite.
Esposito: Now that's kinda hot!

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Castle: She may have built up a wall between us, but I am going to build a door in that wall. Or put up a ladder. [thinking] Or dig a hole.

  --  Deep in Death [2.1]
%
Beckett: [written on a therapist's body] "Psycho the rapist your out of time"?
Lanie: Looks like a patient lost their patience.
Castle: Also his command of grammar. "Your" should be You-apostrophe-R-E as in "you are." That's not even a tough one, not like when to use "who" or "whom."
Beckett: You really think that's the take-away here, Castle?
Castle: I'm just saying - whoever killed her also murdered the English language.

  --  The Double Down [2.2]
%
[After Beckett discovers that Castle placed a bet with Esposito and Ryan over who would solve their murder first]
Castle: Listen, I'm sorry. I know it was wrong, I just-
Roselyn: Beckett, you are never gonna believe this.
Beckett: Oh, the bar on "unbelievable" is pretty high right now.
Roselyn: The vic's husband took out a three-million dollar life insurance policy on his wife last month.
Beckett: [to Castle] $100 on us.

  --  The Double Down [2.2]
%
[After Ryan and Esposito catch a break in their case]
Castle: I've got a bad feeling about this.
Beckett: Are we really rooting against solving a murder?
Castle: Well, I don't want to shave my head! Do you?
Beckett: Why would I shave my head?
Castle: You're in on the bet, aren't you?
Beckett: Yeah, but I didn't realize-
[Castle imitates electric razor]

  --  The Double Down [2.2]
%
Castle: It's a common mistake, but it's not ironic that Dr. Cosway's not here for you to lean on. It's just simply tragic. It would be ironic if her death made you feel better.

  --  The Double Down [2.2]
%
[Beckett, Ryan, and Esposito are at dead ends in their respective cases]
Beckett: We'll start over. Fresh eyes. You take our murder, we'll take yours.
Esposito: All right.
Castle: [a thought strikes him] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Say that again.
Beckett: [confused] "You take our murder, we'll take yours".
Castle: Could it be that easy? You take mine, I'll take yours.
Esposito: What are you getting at, Castle?
Castle: Strangers on a Train.
Ryan: The Hitchcock movie?
Castle: I'm partial to the novel by Patricia Highsmith, but yes. We have two strong suspects, but with airtight alibis, right?
Esposito: Right.
Castle: We know they're connected. What if the connection is the killers?
Beckett: Jason and Eric committed each other's murders.
Castle: And made sure they had an airtight alibi for the murder they knew they'd be suspected of. It's not our victims that are connected, it's our murderers. Crisscross!

  --  The Double Down [2.2]
%
Esposito: Lanie ran the substance on our vics against the Hudson River water. It's a match.
Ryan: Marx gets on the boat uptown, Cosway joins him at Chelsea Piers, and they ride to Pier 11 together.
Castle: So one day, maybe they start talking. Maybe about the Yankee bullpen, maybe about the attractive secretary leaning up against the railing. Oh, and Jason starts grumbling about his wife. Eric maybe mentions how he covets Frank's apartment.
Esposito: Yeah, well, there's an open upper deck. I figure that's where they were doing their plottin'.
Beckett: And how the water from the Hudson got on both of them.
Castle: It gets transferred from Eric Marx's jacket and gloves to Ashley Cosway when they struggle.
Esposito: Then to Frank Anderson when Jason Cosway swipes his watch and wallet.
Ryan: Done deal.
Beckett: Except it's all circumstantial. The DA will never buy it without hard evidence or a confession.
Esposito: Oh, we're gonna get a confession.
[Beckett and Castle scoff as they look at each other and then back at Ryan and Esposito]
Castle: Not if we get one first.
Ryan: So, bet's back on?
Beckett: [getting in his face] You bet your britches the bet is back on.

  --  The Double Down [2.2]
%
[A murder calls Castle away from an ad-hoc play rehearsal with his mother]
Alexis: Take me with you!
Castle: To a crime scene?
Alexis: It'd be educational. Please?
Castle: Find your own hiding place.

  --  Inventing the Girl [2.3]
%
[Explaining why they should continue ad-hoc play rehearsal]
Martha: If it's a hit, who knows how long it could run? Then I could take it on the road.
Alexis: You mean you'd leave us?
Martha: Well, only for nine months of the year. [noticing Alexis' concerned expression] Oh, don't look so sad. [noticing Castle's dreamy expression] And, you, don't look so happy.

  --  Inventing the Girl [2.3]
%
[Beckett and Castle working to learn the victim's identity and where she might have been]
Castle: Well, she's tall, she's gorgeous, 10 pounds underweight. Her hair is fried, she's wearing too much eye makeup. She's a model. Which means she was probably at a club last night. It is, after all, Fashion Week, when all the hottest women in the world descend upon the hippest nightspots like locusts. Only, locusts eat.

  --  Inventing the Girl [2.3]
%
Esposito: Castle, hey, is your, your girl here?
Ryan: Rina.
Beckett: Rina used to baby-sit Alexis, fellas. So, as far as Big Rick here is concerned, she might as well be wearing a chastity belt.
Castle: Thank you for that visual image. That's... And also, thank you for calling me "Big Rick".

  --  Inventing the Girl [2.3]
%
[Castle discovers why Beckett was upset with him]
Castle: Wait, is that why you've been so upset? Because I let her [Cosmo reporter] read it before you?
Beckett: I am the inspiration. I should be reading it before a reporter does.
Castle: Why didn't you just say so?
Beckett: Why didn't you just give it to me?
Castle: Why didn't you ask?
Beckett: Why didn't it occur to you?
[Brief pause, and then he realizes she has a point]
Castle: You'll have it by tomorrow.
Beckett: Good.
Castle: Good.

  --  Inventing the Girl [2.3]
%
[After Castle leaves, Beckett turns on her computer, only to find a snapshot of her modeling for tennis agency]
Ryan: Looking good, Detective Beckett.
[Looks over and sees Ryan and Esposito grinning at her.]
Beckett: How did you guys...
Ryan: We're detectives
Esposito: Called your dad.
Beckett: [Rising up and walking over to them] Okay, okay, you guys have had your fun. I was 17 and I thought that modeling would be an easier way to make money than waitressing.
Esposito: Right.
Beckett: It was one summer, no big deal. [Turns and walks away, but snaps her fingers and turns back] And if you guys tell Castle about this, I will kill you.

  --  Inventing the Girl [2.3]
%
Castle: You don't think Fletcher's telling Jerry the truth?
Beckett: That he's suddenly a con-man with a heart of gold? No. That's just another con.
Castle: Wait, you don't think people can change?
Beckett: No. I've seen too many repeat offenders to believe for one second that a guy who promises never to beat his wife again actually won't.
Castle: That's a pretty bleak attitude.
Beckett: Not bleak - realistic.

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
Castle: [on CIA Agent Gray] This man is a machine. I've interviewed serial killers, hitmen. Agent Gray?
Beckett: Mm-hmm?
Castle: By far, the most dangerous man I've ever met. [looks around and whispers] He once killed a North Korean agent with a melonballer.
Agent Gray: [suddenly appearing behind them] It was an ice cream scoop, Castle. And that information was supposed to remain private.
Castle: Sorry.

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
Beckett: I hate this case.
Castle: I know, isn't it great?!

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
Conman's fiance: He wasn't a con man. He was in the CIA.
Castle: [thrilled] Best case ever.
Beckett: [half-interrupting him] Shut up.

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
[When Beckett tells Castle she hasn't read Heat Wave yet]
Castle: You were all over me to get a copy of that book. Do you have any idea how many hoops I had to jump through, just so my editor wouldn't send an armed guard to watch over you while you read it? The least you could do is to... [pauses and looks at her] Oh. Oh! I see what you're doing.
Beckett: I'm not doing anything.
Castle: Oh, yes, you are. Yes, you are. You're trying to push my buttons, but it's not gonna work.
Beckett: Really?
Castle: Mmm.
Beckett: 'Cause it seems to be working just great. [smirks]

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
[Castle explaining his 'case-breaking' information]
Castle: Well, I went a little Daddy Dearest on Alexis. And it got me thinking, if I can go this crazy over a violin teacher, how crazy would I go if my daughter was about to marry a scam artist? Crazy enough to kill, maybe?
Beckett: That is...
Castle: Inspired?
Beckett: No.
Castle: Brilliant?
Beckett: Mm, mm.
Castle: Genius?
Beckett: Uh, uh.
Castle: What?
Beckett: Thin!
Castle: Oh.
Beckett: We don't have the slightest indication that Elise's father knew that Flectcher was a con artist.
[Ryan and Esposito walk in]
Ryan: Maybe not. But Castle here suggested that we check gun registration records for Gerry Finnegan.
Esposito: And guess who happens to own the same caliber handgun as our murder weapon?
Beckett: Who?
Esposito: Gerry Finnegan.
Beckett: Shut the front door!
Castle: No time for dirty talk, go get changed.

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
Castle: What good news?
Elise: Nothing.
Susan: Fletcher's alive.
Castle: Best case ever!

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
[After Castle and Beckett figure out the case and realize who the killer is]
Mrs. Finnegan: But what about the phone call from Steven?
Castle: Well, she must've faked it somehow.
Mrs. Finnegan: Why?
Castle: Because...
Beckett and Castle: The con is still on!

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
Beckett: It's really a kind of psychopathy. To be so cold that you can look someone in the eye, tell them that you love them, and then rob them blind without the slightest remorse.
Castle: [Blinks and holds up his hands] Whoa, I just flashed back to the eighth grade. [Indignant] Sherry Ort. Broke my heart, stole my lunch money.
[Cell phone rings and Beckett answers it]
Beckett: Beckett.
Castle: [raving on] Then she laughed about it with her friends.

  --  Fool Me Once [2.4]
%
[Castle has arrived late to a crime scene]
Esposito: Yeah, it's too bad, too. Your kind of case, bro'.
Castle: Yeah?
Ryan: Yeah, body was found down that manhole over there. Half eaten.
Castle: Eaten?
Ryan: Yeah, it was covered in some kind of green slime.
Castle: Whoa...
Esposito: Yeah, it was creepy. It's as if someone or some thing is down there.
Castle: [Catching on] Ha, that's... okay. Very funny. Great. [To Beckett] Was there a body down the manhole?
Beckett: Yeah.
Castle: Okay, thank you. An adult.
Beckett: Yeah, you should have seen what else was down there. Two metal canisters with bio-hazard stickers and yellow powder inside of them.
Castle: You opened the... [the detectives smirk] Alright. Will someone please tell me what's really going on here?
Ryan: We're gonna check nearby trash cans for the murder weapon.
Castle: What was the murder weapon, by the way?
Ryan: Some kind of death ray.
Esposito: Turns your insides out.

  --  When the Bough Breaks [2.5]
%
[At the book launch party for "Heat Wave", Beckett learned earlier that Castle had an offer for writing three books about "a certain british secret agent"]
Beckett: [Having read the dedication in the "Heat Wave" book] I was just, eh, the, eh, the dedication, wow, thank you...
Castle: I meant it, you are extraordinary. Listen, I was thinking - [Beckett listening in anticipation] what if the wife got onto the affair?
Beckett: [Surprised] Melissa Talbert? Our killer?
Castle: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...
Beckett: Well ... Anything's possible, I didn't see it that way.
Castle: Huh, you're saying that because you've never been scorned...
Beckett: What makes you say that?
Castle: Well, come on, what man has ever turned you away?
Beckett: [Looking uncomfortable] So, any word on a certain british secret agent who shall not be named?
Castle: I got the official offer!
Beckett: [Looking disappointed by the expectation of their relationship ending] Wow, congratulations!
Castle: I haven't accepted it yet.
Beckett: But you're going to, aren't you?
Castle: Wait, you think I should?
Beckett: Yeah, I mean is there a reason why you wouldn't?
Castle: So you'd be OK if I didn't write another "Nikki Heat"?
Beckett: [Laughing] I mean, why wouldn't I? It's not like I asked you to write the first one...
Castle: You know, a lot of people would be flattered if someone chose to write a book based on them...
Beckett: Flattered? Do you have any idea how much grief I've had to put up with over this "Nikki Heat"-thing?
Castle: Gee, I'm sorry...

  --  When the Bough Breaks [2.5]
%
[after the case is solved Castle and Beckett come down a staircase]
Beckett: Thank you, Castle, I, uhm, never would have been able to solve this case without your help.
[awkward pause]
Beckett: Well, uh, good luck on your new book, I know that you'll do it proud.
Castle: Thanks [reaches out for Beckett] you take care of yourself [they shake hands] and...
[both cellphones ring]
Castle: My agent...
Beckett: It's the ... uh ... station... I, you know you better get that...
Castle: Yeah - hey Paula!
Beckett: Beckett
Castle: Ahah, really? [to Beckett] First day, "Heat Wave" sales through the roof!
Beckett: [to Castle] I'm on hold for Captain Montgomery
Castle: [to Beckett] Reviews are raves!
Beckett: Yes, Captain
Castle: Would I be interested in doing three more "Nikki Heats"?
Beckett: Yes, I am aware that the mayor is facing a tough re-election this year...
Castle: I'm sorry, how much?!?
Beckett: No, I would love to help the department out in every way I could...
Castle: No, no, forget the other offer, for that kind of money I'll do a dozen "Nikki Heats"!
Beckett: [flabbergasted] He wants me to what?
Castle: Oh, well that was kind of a one-time only situation with her and me...
Beckett: Three books? That would take forever!
Castle: You already spoke to the mayor?
Beckett: [to Castle, whispering] I can kill you!
Castle: [looking flabbergasted]
Beckett: No, no, no, no sir, I wasn't talking to you! I, uh, no need to thank me sir, I am happy to help his honour out in any way I can... [hanging up]
Castle: Uh-huh, you know what, I think ... I'm gonna, Paula, I'm gonna ... I'll call you back... [hanging up]
Castle: [to Beckett] I had nothing to do with that phonecall!
[Beckett's phone ringing]
Beckett: What? [listening to the phone] OK, I'll be right there! [starting to walk away]
Castle: [looking confused] Where are you going?
Beckett: That was Esposito, there's been a murder. [turning around] Are you coming or what?
Castle: [hastens towards Beckett]
Beckett: Do you really expect me to believe you had nothing to do with that phonecall?
Castle: I swear I had nothing to do!
Beckett: Swear a little harder Castle, I don't believe you!
Castle: I swear!
[Episode ends]

  --  When the Bough Breaks [2.5]
%
[Castle enters the room, dressed as Mal from Firefly]
Alexis: Hey.
Castle: Hey... I was just trying on my Halloween costume.
Alexis: What exactly are you supposed to be?
Castle: Space cowboy.
Alexis: Okay. A: there are no cows in space. B: didn't you wear that, like, five years ago?
Castle: So?
Alexis: So, don't you think you should move on?
Castle: I like it.

  --  Vampire Weekend [2.6]
%
Castle: [to Alexis] If any of those senior boys bother you... father won't be quite himself. [activates pumpkin drill, laughs maniacally, coughs]

  --  Vampire Weekend [2.6]
%
[Castle relates a traumatizing childhood experience that spurred him to become a mystery writer]
Castle: It must have just happened, because the tide hadn't washed away the blood. We had just played hide-and-go-seek the day before.
Beckett: What happened to him?
Castle: They never found out.
Beckett: I'm so sorry, Castle. [Slowly he looks up at her and smirks. In realization;] You made that up?
Castle: It's what I do!
Beckett: You know what? You are so getting it for that one!

  --  Vampire Weekend [2.6]
%
[Castle, Beckett and Esposito staring at Ryan's familiarity with vampires and covens]
Ryan: What? [reluctantly] I used to go out with a girl who was into the lifestyle.
Esposito: What happened? Did the relationship suck?
Castle: Oh!
[The two chuckle and tap fingers]
Ryan: She wanted to have sex in a coffin. I'm opened-mind, but not that open-minded...

  --  Vampire Weekend [2.6]
%
Castle: What?
Beckett: Nothing... it's just I'm so used to seeing you act like a 12-year-old all the time, it's refreshing to see you as a father.
Castle: It makes you want me, right?
Beckett: ...And there's the 12-year-old again.

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
Castle: Does he look like a killer to you?
Beckett: Everybody looks like a killer to me, Castle. Job requirement
Castle: Do I look like a killer to you?
Beckett: Yes, you kill my patience.

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
Esposito: Found your stalker. Franco Marquez, aka Frankie Markie. Hayley filed half a dozen complaints against him. It says here that he even tried to break into her apartment. And when she filed against him, he showed up in court and called her a...[sees Alexis] B-I-T-C-H.
Castle: She can spell, Detective.
Ryan: Probably better than you

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
Castle: And you will go off to school.
Alexis: But I was just helpful.
Castle: Yes, but if I let you out of class every time you were helpful, you'd never go.
Alexis: But I won't be able to focus on school today. I just can't concentrate.
Castle: Which will make you just like all the other kids in your class.

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
[Beckett speaking to a drunk Sky, who slipped on the ground]
Sky: What do you want? 'Cause I'm talking to my sister.
Beckett: I'm Detective Kate Beckett. I'd like to ask you a few questions, if that's okay.
Sky: You're a cop?
Beckett: Yeah. Is that a knife?
Sky: Am I breaking the law?
Beckett: Yeah.
Sky: Bad?
Beckett: Pretty bad.
[After a moment, Sky hands Beckett the knife and bottle]

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
Castle: [walking in] I was just thinking, if she was using again, that would explain why she left her producers, but not why she was killed, who killed her, or why she went to the po...lice. [noticing Beckett's expression as she put down the phone] What I just said was not confusing enough for your face to do what it's doing.
Beckett: That was Perlmutter. That tox results just got back from the lab. There were no drugs in Hayley's system. She was 100% clean and sober.
Castle: Then why was she giving a wad of cash to Tony the drug dealer?
[Beckett grabs a bowl of mints, sets it down in front of Castle and the two thoughtfully chew on one]

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
Beckett: So, someone attacked her, someone she was afraid of. She tries to shoot them. And in the struggle, the assailant breaks her neck, drags her down an alleyway, hangs her upside-down, paints a smile on her face, which- [realizing how ridiculous she sounds] apparently was a lot like a music video that has nothing to do with our murder,
Castle: You thought you sounded so smart when you started that sentence, didn't you?

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
Castle: If you killed someone, you would tell me, right?
Alexis: Of course. I'd need help hiding the body.
Castle: Ah, haha. That's my girl.

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
[talking about Haley's final song, Threshold]
Castle: Yeah. Sound pretty. Little creepy, though.
Martha: Very creepy.
Alexis: How's it creepy?
Castle: "Death, she grows near"? It's kind of like Final Destination, but in song form.
Alexis: She doesn't mean "death" death.
Castle: Well, what other kinds of death are there?
Alexis: Allegorical, metaphoric, symbolic, spiritual, emotional, sexual -
Castle: Okay, okay, that's quite enough. I think I'm paying far too much for her education.

  --  Famous Last Words [2.7]
%
[after a SWAT team breaks into an apartment]
Esposito: Where's Nidal Metar? Shakir Nidal Metar! Where is he?
Tenant: There's no Shakir Nidal Metar here! Only Sally Neidermeyer!
Beckett: Ma'am, did you send a package by bike courier this morning?
Tenant: Yes, I did!
Beckett: "S. Nidal Metar?" S. Neidermeyer! Some bozo at the courier company wrote the name wrong.
Castle: Our bad. Uh, we can -
Ryan: - Yeah, we can fix this.
Castle: [lifting the door] Sorry.
[They screw the door back into its frame]

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
[as Det. Beckett speaks with the victim's sister]
Castle: How does she do that?
Montgomery: Better than anyone I know.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
[M.E. Perlmutter eats his lunch on an examination table in the morgue]
Castle: Are you sure it's sanitary to be eating here?
Perlmutter: Do you know the strength of the disinfectants we use here? This is the cleanest room in the city. [offers his sandwich to Castle]
Castle: I couldn't.
Perlmutter: Homemade.
Castle: I couldn't.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Montgomery: If there's one thing I hate, it's a dirtbag in uniform.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Beckett: [arriving on the scene of the crime] So, what do we got?
Castle: May I?
Esposito: Be my guest.
Castle: Thank you. Our victim's name is Caleb Shimky...
Esposito: Shimansky.
Castle: Is that an A?
Esposito: Yeah, it's an A.
Castle: And he was pulling a Kevin Bacon in Quicksilver when all of-
Beckett: I'm sorry, a what?
Castle: Quicksilver. [Beckett shakes her head] Kevin Bacon is a bike messenger who failed as a-
Beckett: [turns to Esposito] Esposito, take him to school.
Esposito: The victim is Caleb Shimansky, an on-duty bike messenger. Masked suspect in a black 4-door plows into him, killing him instantly. The suspect steals the messenger bag, jumps in his ride and jets off.
Beckett: [looking back at Castle] See, that wasn't so hard.
Castle: No, no, it's good, if you like the dull, non-best-seller version.
Esposito: I thought I gave it some flair.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Beckett: Well, it says here that Olivia went to a party earlier the night she was killed.
Montgomery: Says here the Pierson Club.
Castle: Pierson Club? That's high society, that's creme de la creme. My money goes in banks, their money buys banks.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Beckett: Were the two of you dating?
Dilahunt: Uh, no, just friends. What? Can't a guy and a girl just be friends?
Castle: Please.
Dilahunt: Are you two together?
Castle: [simultaneously] Not yet.
Beckett: [simultaneously] Absolutely not.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Montgomery: Never let the job get in the way of the job.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Blake Wellesley: I speak for the entire Wellesley family when I say you can expect our full cooperation in this investigation.
Castle: But? You can tell, there's a "but" coming.
Blake: Not a "but", a "however". Like I said, we'll cooperate, however, we request these unannounced interviews come to a stop.
Beckett: Here we go.
Montgomery: Beckett, let's hear him out.
Blake: I apologize if I'm coming off like one of those guys, Detective. It's just that these impromptu visits are a bit awkward. My nephew Trent said you spoke to him when he visited my mother. Mother became very confused, very upset. I'm sure there's a better way to facilitate this.
Beckett: Like what?
Blake: Well, I propose that all further interviews be coordinated by me and conducted at my offices. What do you think?
Montgomery: Thank you for your offer, Mr. Wellesley. It's very nice of you.
Blake: [rising up from his seat] Not at all. I'll give you my number-
Montgomery: Hold on. I, too, have a "however". Thank you for your offer, however, my detectives will conduct their investigation in any manner they see fit.
Blake: Captain, I can get the commissioner on the phone in under a minute.
Montgomery: Well, tell him I said hi, and I could really use a raise. [Rising up] I think we're done here. [Lets out his hand to shake, but Blake walks away. After he leaves...]
Castle: That was awesome!
Montgomery: Whatever you guys are doing, keep doing it. They're circling the wagons.
Castle: [rising up, and pointing at Montgomery with a grin] Awesome!

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Martha: What will Chet think if he expects 1980s Martha, and present-day Martha shows up?
Castle: You tell anyone I said this, and I'll deny it. And I'm only gonna say it once; 1980s Martha was pretty great, but present-day Martha is pretty spectacular, too.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Alexis: I can't believe how many lives were ruined over one woman's need to protect her family's reputation.
Castle: You will never have this problem. Between Grams and myself, our family reputation's already in ruins.
Alexis: Mmm. Lucky me.

  --  Kill the Messenger [2.8]
%
Norman Jessup: I've always been good with locks. When I was in the joint, I was thinking how can I take this and make it more productive, you know? So, I've been applying for locksmith schools, but, you know, they won't let me in on account that I'm a felon. Can you believe that?
Kate Beckett: A felon who wants to be a locksmith. What could possibly go wrong there?

  --  Love Me Dead [2.9]
%
Kate Beckett: How does a prosecutor get into business with a criminal?
Rick Castle: Well, it's hard out there for a pimp who's also a DA. Ooh, that be a good character for a novel. A star prosecutor who's always excelled at everything he's ever done. He couldn't possibly imagine that being a pimp would be a bigger job than he can handle by himself. But one day he gets a call, one of his girls has been knocked around by a client. He realises there's nothing he can do about it, he's a very public figure. So, a white collar prosecutor decides to hire a blue collared enforcer. Can't exactly take out an ad on Craigslist for that. But fortunately enough, he has a big stack of qualified candidates sitting right on his desk.
Kate Beckett: Which is where he found John Knox. A criminal who mostly managed to stay out of prison.
Rick Castle: Which makes him a smart criminal.
Kate Beckett: Yeah.
Rick Castle: Buckley offers him a deal. Come work for me, I'll throw your case. And Knox does. For a while, everyone's happy. But then Knox decides he's not happy being number two anymore. He takes Buckley's client list, tells Buckley to take a hike.
Kate Beckett: Knowing that Buckley can't do anything about it without risking exposure.
Rick Castle: But Buckley's never backed down from a fight in his life. He gets the cops to drag Knox down to his office to remind him who's boss.
Kate Beckett: But Knox took it up a notch, sending a warning shot across Buckley's bow by threatening his brother-in-law.
Rick Castle: And when Buckely wouldn't back down, Knox threw him off the roof of the parking garage.
Kate Beckett: Jeez, if only we had some proof.
Rick Castle: Who needs proof? What a great story.

  --  Love Me Dead [2.9]
%
Castle: Thanks.
Beckett: For what?
Castle: For not saying "I told you so."
Beckett: Oh, that starts tomorrow.

  --  Love Me Dead [2.9]
%
Castle [after seeing Alexis dressed maturely for work]: Did that ever happen to you with me? One day you look and see your boy all grown up?
Martha: I'm still waiting for that moment, actually.
Castle: ...I set you up for that, didn't I?

  --  One Man's Treasure [2.10]
%
Castle [to Beckett]: That was pretty cool, the way you filled in the story there. I think I must be rubbing off on you... That sounded dirtier than I meant it.

  --  One Man's Treasure [2.10]
%
Montgomery: [looking in the room] Is that our vic's wife?
Beckett: Fiancee.
Castle: [pointing to the other room] The wife is over there.
Montgomery: Come again?
Beckett: [tilts her head toward one room] Fiancee.
Montgomery: Mmm-hmm.
Beckett: [tilts head toward the other room] Wife.
Montgomery: Hmm. [chuckles] Oh, boy.
Castle: I know, isn't it delicious?

  --  One Man's Treasure [2.10]
%
Beckett: ...but changing your identity? The math doesn't quite add up for me.
Castle: You know what math doesn't add up for me? Two wives.
Beckett: One wife too many for you?
Castle: Two wives too many.
Beckett: Seems like the common denominator in that equation is you.

  --  One Man's Treasure [2.10]
%
Castle: Well?
Beckett: Alexis? She's fine.
Castle: You know, her first day at preschool, I hid outside in the bushes all day just to make sure she was all right.
Montgomery: First time my son went to summer camp, I followed the bus all the way to the Adirondacks.
[Two laugh together]
Beckett: You two are both either very sweet or very creepy.

  --  One Man's Treasure [2.10]
%
Ryan: ...Maybe it was a pride thing.
Castle: Yeah, but you factor in the sublet, not to mention gas, that's a high price to pay for pride.
Beckett: Yeah, well, never underestimate the fragility of the male ego.
Ryan: Oh, see, that's just a stereotype-
Castle: Don't. Don't. That's... She is baiting us, all right. Just ignore her, and she'll lose her witchy powers.
Beckett: You wish. All right, let's go off to Parker's office. [As they rise, Beckett looks around and checks her pockets]
Castle: Lose something?
Beckett: Um, where... where, um... Where's my broom?
[Castle laughs sarcastically]

  --  One Man's Treasure [2.10]
%
Castle: A wife and fiancee catfight! Please tell me we can stop for popcorn on the way.

  --  One Man's Treasure [2.10]
%
Martha: What if it doesn't work out? What if it does?
Castle: That's the cost of living.

  --  The Fifth Bullet [2.11]
%
Castle: This is dead. You're not. Time to start making new memories
Martha: How did you get so smart?

  --  The Fifth Bullet [2.11]
%
Darius: This is crazy. I told you already, I was in class when Mr. Fink was killed.
Beckett: Nobody remembers seeing you there.
Darius: I sat in the back.
Castle: The naughty kids always do.

  --  The Fifth Bullet [2.11]
%
Kyra Blaine: Of all the murders, in all the cities, at all the weddings, and you walk into mine.

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Ryan: All day yesterday, I kept feeling like I'd heard the name Kyra Blaine before. And then it hits me. The dedication of Castle's second book, A Rose For Everafter.
Esposito: "For Kyra Blaine. You make the stars shine."
Beckett: When I'm not here, do you guys braid each other's hair and debate who's the coolest Jonas brother?
Esposito: No. But it's totally Nick.
Ryan: Absolutely Nick.

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Lanie: [amused] Girl, I'm gonna smack you! You work side by side everyday. He writes a sex scene in his book about you that had me reaching for ice water. Now, little miss bride shows up. Don't tell me you're not the least bit jealous.
Beckett: Oh, please. You've been inhaling too many autopsy fluids. [Beckett begins to leave the room.]
Lanie: Honey, just because you can't see whats goin' on [Voice escalates as Beckett starts leaving] doesn't mean everyone else doesn't see what's going on!
Beckett: [from outside the room, in a singsong] Shut up!
Lanie: [to Sophie, the corpse] Mm-hmm. I see it. You may not, but I do.

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
[After Alexis tapes Castle to a chair and then tapes his mouth.]
Alexis: Okay, we're off. And after, we might go shopping. [hugs him and comes away with his wallet and grabs a few bills] So, you don't mind, right? [Castle exclaims] Oh, come on, Dad. We both know you'd have no respect for me if I didn't.
[Castle gives an agreeing nod]

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Castle: Bridesmaid dresses are supposed to be hideous.
Esposito: Really? Why?
Beckett: So that the bride looks more beautiful in comparison.
Castle: Ah, see? Not a woman alive who doesn't think about her wedding day, not even Kate Beckett. Tell me you never tore a picture of a wedding gown out of a magazine.
Beckett: [pointedly] I've never torn a picture of a wedding gown out of a magazine. [walks away and smirks]
Castle: You're lying. She's lying
Ryan: Mmm-hmm.

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Lanie: So, how's everything going in the bridal suite? Not the day they had planned.
Beckett: Yeah, or the surprise guest. [Lanie gives her a questioning glance] Apparently, Castle has a history with the bride.
Lanie: Ancient, modern, or sexual?
Beckett: Seems like all of the above.
Lanie: You okay with that?
Beckett: Yeah. Why wouldn't I be? [Now Lanie gives her a skeptical glance] Just keep me posted on the labs.
Lanie: Mmm-hmm

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Castle: Hello, Sheila.
Sheila Blaine: Richard. Figures you'd be at the heart of this mess.
Castle: Detective Beckett, this is Sheila Blaine, mother of the bride. So, I guess I didn't end up homeless or teaching at a third-rate college in New Hampshire after all.
Sheila: There's still time.
Castle: I've missed our special talks. [to Beckett] Sheila didn't approve of struggling artists. [to Sheila] You must like Greg, though. He's from money, right?
Sheila: It was never about the money, Richard. It was about character. And you would know that, if you had any.
Beckett: Wow! Just imagine, if things had worked out, you'd be spending Thanksgivings with her.

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Beckett: Do you recognize these files, Mr. Murphy?
Ted Murphy: You went to my office?
Beckett: We got a warrant first. Don't worry.
Murphy: Look, a layman like you couldn't possibly understand the financial and the legal complications of an estate like Greg's.
Castle: I think he just called you stupid.

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Kyra: [to Beckett] He's all yours.

  --  A Rose For Everafter [2.12]
%
Beckett: What if I let her down?
Castle [after a pause]: Do you know why I chose you as my inspiration for Nikki Heat?
Beckett: No. Why?
Castle: Because you're tall.
[Beckett smiles and relaxes]
Castle: Now go in there and do your job.

  --  Sucker Punch [2.13]
%
[Beckett has discovered who killed her mother, only to have to shoot him to save Castle's life]
Beckett: It wasn't your fault, you know.
Castle: I overstepped. I came down here to say that I'm sorry... and that I'm through. I can't shadow you any more. If it wasn't for me --
Beckett: If it wasn't for you, I would never have found my mom's killer. And some day soon I'm gonna find the sons of bitches who had him kill her. And I'd like you around when I do. And if you tell anyone what I'm about to say there's gonna be another shooting, but... I've gotten used to you pulling my pigtails. I have a hard job, Castle, and having you around makes it a little more fun.
Castle: ...Your secret's safe with me.

  --  Sucker Punch [2.13]
%
[Beckett, unsure if she can continue the case, speaks to her father]
Jim Beckett: Your mother always said that life never delivers anything that we can't handle. I mean, she lived by that, you know. Called it "Johanna's Immutable Law of the Universe." And for years, I thought she was wrong. Because I couldn't handle losing her. Now, I can almost hear her whisper, "I told you so."
Beckett: [smiling] Four of Mom's favorite words.
Jim: Look, she was a devout believer in the truth. And if she were here right now, she'd tell you the truth can never hurt you. You know, this may be your mother's way of reaching out to you, Katie. And reminding you that the truth is still your weapon to wield. Not theirs.

  --  Sucker Punch [2.13]
%
Beckett: Montgomery's post-incident evaluation. You come off like Steven Segal.
Castle: Should I be flattered or insulted?
Beckett: Both.

  --  Sucker Punch [2.13]
%
Esposito [to Castle]: Why do you care about some mother-freaking snakes on a mother-freaking plane?

  --  The Third Man [2.14]
%
Castle: There are two things in abundance in South Africa: racial hatred and diamonds.

  --  The Third Man [2.14]
%
Ryan [about Beckett and Castle]: Do they know they're finishing each other's sentences?

  --  The Third Man [2.14]
%
Ryan: If this squatter was so meticulous about putting things back, why'd he leave all this for us to find?
Castle: You're right. It makes no sense.
Beckett: [surprised] What? No grand theatrical theory to spin for us?
Castle: Honestly, I got nothing

  --  The Third Man [2.14]
%
Castle: So, how was your day?
Alexis: I had a truly great day. I got pulled out of class and called to the vice-principal's office.
Castle: Why? What did she want?
Alexis: You. Here's her number.
Castle: Her number?
Alexis: Oh! And my German teacher, Fraulein Sonnenberg wanted me to tell you, auf Deutsch, "Du hast Sexappeal." She's two years from ordering off the senior menu, but here's her number, too.
Castle: Fraulein Sonnenberg?
Alexis: Too old? That's okay, 'cause my friend Sloan thinks you're real choice. She is 17, but she'll be legal in three months. Hey, maybe we could double?
Castle: [beginning to grin] Oh? You hate me a little bit right now, don't you?
Alexis: Just a little.

  --  The Third Man [2.14]
%
Castle: Well, the pen is mightier than the sword, but a baseball bat can be pretty effective too.

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
[after hearing Castle comes from a line of mind readers]
Beckett: Con artists and circus people, huh?
Castle: Yeah, and mind-readers.
Beckett: Really? So tell me what I'm thinking.
Castle: Ah! You're... You're thinking... You don't care and you want me to stop talking?
Beckett: Ooh, that's uncanny.
Castle: It's in the blood.

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
[after accusing a suspect with a lot of evidence]
Beckett: So you can play dumb, or you can play ball.
Castle: Pun intended.

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
[after being told they were investigating someone's trip to Cuba]
Beckett:I don't know...me in a swimsuit under the hot, blistering sun.
Castle:I'd be happy to rub lotion on you.

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
Castle: What is it with professional sports? Even the agencies are on steroids.
Beckett: Fox's client list is a veritable who's-who of star athletes. Five percent of their endorsements and salaries? You could pay for half of lower Manhattan.
Castle: ...did you just use the word "veritable?"
Beckett: Yes, I did.
Castle: Sexy.
Beckett: You should hear me say "fallacious."

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
[after meeting Joe Torre]
Beckett: That was Joe freaking Torre!

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
Castle: We should get a warrant, run his subscribers against any hate mail that the Vegas might have gotten.
Montgomery: You sure you got no cop in the Castle family tree?
Castle: No, us Castles are mostly con artists and circus folk, sir.
Montgomery: No, I think there's a little cop in there somewhere.

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
[Castle's theory on the suspected killer]
Castle: Maybe it was the Cuban government all along. They hated Vega for defecting, so they sent a beautiful spy for him to fall in love with. It works. He smuggles her back home, and bam, he's dead.
Montgomery: Sounds like a Castle story.
[Esposito scoffs]
Castle: I'll call it "Corazon de Fuego."

  --  Suicide Squeeze [2.15]
%
Castle: Maybe our killer has a sweet tooth.
Beckett: Given the state of undress I would say it's more likely a sexual fetish.
Lanie: I can do the chocolate. I will even do the whipped cream bikini, but caramel? I prefer slippery to sticky.
Castle: [To Ryan] Does she know we can hear her?

  --  The Mistress Always Spanks Twice [2.16]
%
[After learning where Mistress Venom worked]
Beckett: [On the phone] Hi, my name is Kate, and my boyfriend has been a very bad boy. [Castle smirks] Yes, that's right. His name's Ricky.
Castle: What're you doin'? [Chasing after Beckett who is still on the phone]
Beckett: Actually, a friend of mine recommended a Mistress Venom - is she available tonight? 4pm? Sure, that's perfect, thank you.
Castle: OK, that's very funny, now call her back!
Beckett: Uh-uh Castle, this is the perfect way to get Venom without tipping our hand. [Starting to walk away and turns around] What's the matter Castle, you afraid of a little role play? [Smirking]
Castle: Yeah, you better run!

  --  The Mistress Always Spanks Twice [2.16]
%
[At the dungeon]
Receptionist: Welcome to Lady Irena's House Of Pain, how can I serve you?
Beckett: [Shouting at Castle] Well, answer her! [to the receptionist] You see what I have to deal with? My boyfriend Ricky has an appointment at 4pm with Mistress Venom.
Receptionist: Will you be joining her?
Beckett: Oh yes! I've been dying to watch him squirm!
Receptionist: Mistress Venom will be delighted to have an audience. Follow me please.
Beckett: Do you think we could gag him?
Castle: [Looking concerned] Remember, my safe word is Apples!

  --  The Mistress Always Spanks Twice [2.16]
%
[Castle, Beckett and Esposito looking at the suspect in the interrogation room]
Beckett: Castle, why don't you sit this one out? I think Mr. Caraway will respond better to a strong...[zips up her jacket] ...female hand.
[After Beckett walks away, Castle grins with Esposito]
Castle: Sam-I-Am. In a box. With a fox. We're gonna need some popcorn.

  --  The Mistress Always Spanks Twice [2.16]
%
[When Alexis tells Castle and Martha that she's giving up on cheerleading]
Castle: Well, we both learned a valuable lesson today. You learned that you can expand your horizons and grow. I learned that, if that involves short skirts and boys, [sternly] I'm not going to like it.
Alexis: Fair enough.

  --  The Mistress Always Spanks Twice [2.16]
%
Castle: Ask me why I'm here.
Beckett: You know, I ask myself that question every day.

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
Castle: Quick, who do you want to play you in the Nikki Heat movie?
Lanie: [As if it's the most obvious answer in the world] Halle Berry.
Castle: See? Some people are just great at that game! You know who we could get for you? Angelina? No. Kate Beckett... Kate Beckinsale. We'll call you K-Becks!

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
Jordan: What is he doing?
Beckett: He, uh, touches things.
Castle: Night vision goggles. Think I have the newer model though. Maybe in my third book, Nikki Heat will cross paths with a good looking yet cold-hearted FBI profiler. Call it Federal Heat. [Both Beckett and Jordan glare at him] ...Or maybe not.
Jordan: So how long have you two been sleeping together?
Beckett: Um, we're, we're not sleeping together. We, he just observes me.
Jordan: Yeah, I've seen the way he observes you.
Castle: No, she's right. Aside from my second wife, this is most sexless relationship I've ever been in.
Jordan: I've been profiling people for a long time. I'm hardly ever wrong.
Beckett: Well, this time you are. Wrong.
Jordan: So if you're not sleeping together, why do you keep him around?
Castle: You know I can hear you.
Beckett: He's actually proven to be surprisingly helpful.
Jordan: Huh, I'll take your word on that. [Sees Castle playing with a Taser ] Put. The Taser. Down.

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
Castle: [After Tasering a running suspect] See, I'm helping.
Jordan: Yeah, I'll buy you an ice cream later.

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
Castle: I'm here to protect you.
Beckett: What, with your vast arsenal of rapier wit?

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
Castle & Beckett: [Simultaneously] She's a taxidermist!
Lanie: It's so cute the way you two do that.
[Castle grins, Beckett rolls her eyes]

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
Castle: Nikki will burn. I can see the poetry in that. [Beckett looks at him] The terrible, homicidal poetry.

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
Castle: It's a fact of life. People we love leave us. Unless you chain them to a radiator, which for some reason is illegal.

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
[When FBI Agent Jordan Shaw arrives to take over the case]
Beckett: Agent Shaw, my people have already secured the area. CSU is on the scene, and we are canvassing the park, so as happy as I am to see the cavalry, there's really not much left here for you to do.
Jordan: Detective, the gods in the marble halls have sent me here to catch a killer, which I will do with or without your help. Okay? Now, can I see the body?
Castle: That is so going in the movie. Can you say that again, but start from "marble halls"?

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
[Jordan uses her APP to send a fingerprint to the lab]
Castle: [impressed] Wow, there's an app for that?
Jordan: That's why I joined the FBI, Mr. Castle. [waves the app] For the toys.

  --  Tick, Tick, Tick...(1) [2.17]
%
[After a bomb has exploded in Beckett's apartment, Castle races inside to find Beckett alive in her bathtub]
Castle: Kate? Kate! You're alive...oh, and you're naked.
Beckett: Castle, turn around!
Castle: You know, your apartment is on fire. Now might not be the best time for modesty.
Beckett: Castle, hand me a towel.
Castle: [looks around the burning apartment] The towels are on fire.
Beckett: What about the bathrobe?
Castle: The...do you have anything to wear that's not flammable? [starts to turn around]
Beckett: Castle!
Castle: Sorry.
Beckett: Gimme your jacket. Don't look.

  --  Boom! (2) [2.18]
%
Beckett: If you keep quoting Jordan, I'm gonna turn the radio way up. [Walks off]
Castle: [To Ryan and Esposito] Jealous.

  --  Boom! (2) [2.18]
%
Martha: Oh, Richard, darling, you're just in time. I made dinner. [Holds up a takeout container]
Castle: Mother, what are you doing here?
Martha: Oh, we're eating. You know, something families do a couple of times a day.

  --  Boom! (2) [2.18]
%
Beckett: Agent Shaw
Jordan: Just writing you a note. Dunn is being transported to The Tombs, where he'll enjoy his stay in the Intensive Management Unit with the state's most dangerous criminals.
Beckett: Well, he's getting his 15 minutes. It's what he wanted this whole time.
Jordan: Yeah, but it'll be on our terms.
Beckett: I want you to know that I learned a lot from you on this one.
Jordan: You did most of the heaving lifting. Honestly, the thing that impressed me most is that you came in with Castle.
Beckett: You know, some people would call that foolish.
Jordan: You made a tough decision on your feet, used the resources at hand. I'd say that's heroic and somewhat poetic. In the end, Dunn did actually face Nikki Heat. She is, after all, part you, part Castle. He cares about you, Kate. You may not see it, you may not be ready to, but he does.
Beckett: Yeah, well, the situation with Castle is complicated.
Jordan: Ah.

  --  Boom! (2) [2.18]
%
Dunn: This isn't over, Heat.
Beckett: It's not Heat. It's Beckett! You have the right to remain silent, so shut the hell up.

  --  Boom! (2) [2.18]
%
Ryan: Hey, we're thinking maybe you could talk to Montgomery about finding some room in the budget for those smart boards.
Beckett: Sure. While they're at it, maybe they can buy us Batmobiles.
Esposito: That'd be cool.
Ryan: Yeah.
Beckett: Our murder boards are just fine.
Esposito: For a caveman.

  --  Boom! (2) [2.18]
%
Ryan: Got an apartment up on four, and guess who's got the keys. [Jiggles them]
Beckett: [Snatches the keys] I do.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Castle: You know, we might wanna swing down by the museum, see if any of his colleagues can shed some light on who might wanna drop a gargoyle on Medina's head.
Beckett: Either you are being a good cop or you just wanna go to the museum.
Castle: They have dinosaurs there!
Beckett: [Chuckles] Let's go.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Castle: Do you believe that people get what they deserve?
Beckett: Well, if they do then I must have done something pretty terrible to be punished with you.
Castle: Funny.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Ryan: Still no luck with the curse, huh?
Esposito: Look on the bright side, Castle, you die, your book sales skyrocket.
Castle: Great.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Castle: [Cuts himself while trying to cut a tomato] What's the difference between cursed and clumsy?
Alexis: I'll get a band-aid.
Castle: Get two.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
[At the museum]
Castle: Man! I love this place! When Alexis was little, we used to come here every Sunday. We would run around here for hours pretending like we were on safari in Africa or looking for dinosaurs in China.
Beckett: You know, Castle, sometimes I forget that you have such a capacity for pure innocence in your life.
Castle: Yeah. Plus it was a great place to pick up chicks.
Beckett: And then you open your mouth and you ruin it.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Montgomery: You had to mess with the curse, didn't you? Trying to be funny. You know what kind of hell I'd catch if Castle got eaten in the line of duty?
Ryan: Don't tell me you really believe in that stuff, sir.
Montgomery: You know what I believe in, Detective? That there's no upside in screwing with things that you can't explain. First year in homicide, right? My partner tackles a suspect through the window of a gypsy smoke shop. Owner's furious. Threatens all kind of hexes on our houses if we don't personally go and clean it up. And we tell her, "Yeah, take it up with the city." Two hours later, my partner drops dead. Heart attack.
Esposito: And you think it was the hexes?
Montgomery: No. The man ate bacon with every meal. But, next morning, I went over there, fixed that window. And you know why?
Ryan & Esposito: [look at each other for a moment and then back] Because there's no upside in screwing with things you can't explain?
Montgomery: And don't you ever forget it.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Castle: If something were to happen to me, I want you to watch out for Alexis. She looks up to you. And if her boyfriends get frisky, you can shoot them.
Beckett: Nothing's gonna happen to you.
Castle: But if it does...
Beckett: Okay. [smiles]
Castle: And would you also go into my closet and get rid of my porn collection before she finds it?
Esposito: Don't worry, bro. I got you covered on that.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Beckett: Charles, we have your fingerprints on a sarcophagus, so you can either start telling us the truth now, or after spending an afternoon in the holding cell, entertaining a meth addict through the violent phase of his withdrawal.

  --  Wrapped Up In Death [2.19]
%
Beckett: [Watching Castle on tv] Wow! Camera does really add ten pounds... to his ego!

  --  The Late Shaft [2.20]
%
[Watching Alexis pack her bag]
Castle: Um...You're going orienteering, not library-ing. You sure you want to take that many books?
Alexis: Over-ambitious for a five-day trip?
Castle: You're going to be responsible for your own pack. I think you're supposed to be more Sacagawea than a scholarly reader. Besides, look at all those pages. The trees might want revenge.

  --  The Late Shaft [2.20]
%
[Bringing in Manning's body]
Lanie: You know how many strings I had to pull for this, Castle?
Castle: If I'm wrong, I'll reimburse the city.
Lanie: To hell with the city. It's me you're gonna owe. I take spa certificate, jewelry, and cash.
Castle: Duly noted.

  --  The Late Shaft [2.20]
%
Beckett: "FTW"?
Castle: "For the win." Means, "My tweet kicks your tweet's butt." Come on, Beckett. You got to keep up, hang with the cool kids.

  --  The Late Shaft [2.20]
%
Beckett: So, how was your date with your little starlet?
Castle: [scowling] How could you tell this time?
Beckett: Like I said, Castle... [pulls a long strand of hair off his jacket] ...trained detective.

  --  The Late Shaft [2.20]
%
Castle: That is so cool. Do you mind if I take pictures?
Lanie: Knock yourself out, but if any of them end up on the internet, I will hunt you down and hurt you.

  --  Den of Thieves [2.21]
%
Ryan: [to Esposito] I'm your partner. That means I'm with you 'til the wheels fall off.

  --  Den of Thieves [2.21]
%
Castle: What broke?
Alexis: Stupid glass.
Castle: Remind me to get smarter glasses.

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
Castle: This is both literally, and figuratively, cool.

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
Castle: What's a good time?
Beckett: Well, if you don't know by now, it's probably too late to show you.

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
Castle: [Drops his watch into liquid nitrogen] Hey, I froze time!

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
Maddie: [To Beckett] You're hot for Castle. You wanna make little Castle babies!
Beckett: Maddie! He can hear us!

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
[Castle's idea of solving Alexis' problem]
Castle: Or maybe by this weekend, I'll figure out a way to take this tank of liquid nitrogen and build it into a weather machine. I'll make it rain! You friends will have to cancel their trip. You won't have to choose, and then we can take over the world! [Laughs evilly]
Alexis: Not helpful.
Castle: But evil.

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
Castle: High school friend, huh? I bet she knows where all your bodies are buried.
Beckett: You can dig all you want, Castle. My secrets are safe with her.
Castle: How can you be sure?
Beckett: Because whatever she knows about me, I know worse about her.

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
Castle: You ask me, she should have followed her heart, left David, gone with Wolf.
Beckett: You know, I can see the virtue in staying. I mean, guys like Wolf, they come in, they upset the apple cart. Of course he makes you feel alive, but eventually, you know he's just gonna let you down. So why risk it?
Castle: Because the heart wants what the heart wants.

  --  Food to Die For [2.22]
%
Ryan: Beckett's a good cop. She can canvass and make googly eyes at the same time.

  --  Overkill [2.23]
%
Castle: Wilder, Daemon Wilder?
Esposito: Yeah, you know him?
Castle: I know of him, this is a photo of one of his ad campaigns. He runs a line of boutique men's skin care products.
Ryan: You mean like bathroom stuff?
Castle: He's got a toner; totally alcohol free. Fantastic. He's got a shaving cream that is ridiculous.
Esposito: I'm good with the drug store stuff man.
Castle: No no no no, hang on. This stuff will change your life. (squirt)
Esposito: It's hot...
Castle: It's hot.
Ryan: It's hot?
Castle: It's HOT.
Ryan: It's hot! How do they do that?
Beckett: Guys. [all look] A man has been murdered here.
Castle: And... we are honoring his legacy.
Lanie: Hm. It's like Sex And The City, only with boys.

  --  Overkill [2.23]
%
Clerk: Here you go, sir.
Beckett: I cannot believe that you asked for samples.
Castle: She said anything we needed! Besides, it's not for me; it's for Ryan and Esposito.
Beckett: Don't you mean Charlotte and Miranda?
Castle: Wait a minute, that would make me Carrie.
Beckett: You are so metro-sexual for even knowing that!
Castle: I only watched that show out of the corner of my eye when my mother had it on! That did not come out right...

  --  Overkill [2.23]
%
Rebecka: [uncontrollable sobbing] Ishoodhavestaydoutovitwhatwasithinkinggggg...
Castle: What did she say?
Beckett: "What was I thinking? I should have stayed out of it." It's cry talk. There's not a girl alive who hasn't heard it from a sobbing, heartbroken girlfriend.

  --  Overkill [2.23]
%
[Alexis is critiquing her father's work]
Alexis: I think you've been writing too long not to know that it's "I" before "E" except after "C." Ever heard of spell-check?
Castle: Yes, of course. She's got red hair, she's wise beyond her years, and she's about to tell her dad what she thinks of the latest chapter of his new book.

  --  Overkill [2.23]
%
[Hans finds out Castle is not the person he was supposed to meet and grabs his shirt]
Beckett: NYPD! Hands up! [Castle puts his hands up] Not you Castle!
Castle: Right.

  --  A Deadly Game [2.24]
%
Esposito: So... Castle's last case, huh?
Beckett: Mm-hmm.
Esposito: Ryan and I thought we'd do a little going away party.
Beckett: Yeah. Well, it's not like he's leaving forever.
Esposito: You sure about that? Why do you think he's been following you around all this time? What, research? The guy has done enough research to write 50 books. Look... whatever the reason is, I'm pretty sure it doesn't include watching you be with another guy.

  --  A Deadly Game [2.24]
%
Beckett: Oh yeah, and your ex-wife called. She said that you've been avoiding her because you're late delivering your manuscript of Naked Heat. That's a catchy title. When were you gonna tell me?
Castle: I was waiting for the perfect time. It just never happened.
Beckett: She's naked on the cover again, isn't she?
Castle: Kind of, yeah.
Beckett: [sarcastically] That's great. No one's gonna make fun of me.

  --  A Deadly Game [2.24]
%
Lee Copley: [Giving Beckett and Castle his alibi] No, I wasn't at home, but I was in bed...With his wife.
[Castle and Beckett blink in surprise]
Beckett: I'm sorry. What?
Lee: ...I was in bed with Roger's wife.
[Castle and Beckett turn away for a moment in disbelief and then turn at each other]
Castle: [To Lee] Let me get this straight. Your alibi for killing your friend is you were...doing his wife?
Lee: [after a moment]...Yeah.
Castle: Wow.

  --  A Deadly Game [2.24]
%
Mrs. Farraday: So, yeah. I was seeing Lee. Yeah, I was with him that night.
Beckett: Well, if things were that bad, why not just get a divorce?
Mrs. Farraday: Are you serious? My house is too nice.
[Later]
Castle: I can see why Roger needed a little extra fantasy in his life.

  --  A Deadly Game [2.24]
%
Ryan: [Looking at a cardboard cut-out of Castle] He really is ruggedly handsome.

  --  A Deadly Affair [3.1]
%
Beckett: CIA's a popular theory with you.
Castle: Yes, well, law of averages demands that I'll eventually be right.
Beckett: I'd forgotten how helpful your insights can be.

  --  A Deadly Affair [3.1]
%
Castle: You look good.
Beckett: You look good, too.
Castle: Yeah?
Beckett: For murder!

  --  A Deadly Affair [3.1]
%
[Castle explaining to Beckett why he had the gun at the murder scene]
Castle: Maybe you missed the part where I said she was shot dead. When I heard the noises coming from the next room, I thought whoever killed her was coming back. So I picked up the gun to defend myself. It seemed like a very good idea at the time. That's when you, Esposito and Annie Oakley [gestures to the viewing room] come bursting through the door.
Montgomery: Annie Oakley?
Ryan: I kind of almost shot Castle. What? He had a gun.

  --  A Deadly Affair [3.1]
%
Castle: Do you know what these bodies are? A sign.
Beckett: A sign?
Castle: A sign. A sign from the universe telling us we need to solve this case together. You don't wanna let the universe down, do you?
Beckett: You're not gonna go away no matter what I do, are you?
Castle: I respect the universe.
Beckett: Okay, fine. I will let you join me on this one case as long as you promise to do what I say, when I say it, and not to do any investigating on your own.
Castle: I promise. You won't regret this.
Beckett: I already do.
Castle: Starting now.

  --  A Deadly Affair [3.1]
%
Rick Castle: Hey, did I hear you right? Our victim is Vivien Marchand, the psychic medium?
Kevin Ryan: You've heard of her?
Rick Castle: Yeah, she was very popular in certain Manhattan circles. Matter of fact, she did a reading for me at a society party about eight years ago. It was pretty extraordinary.
Kate Beckett: "Extraordinary"?
Rick Castle: She got everything right. You know what? Come to think of it, she told me a beautiful woman would one day move into my loft and stay with me forever. She neglected to mention it was my mother.

  --  He's Dead, She's Dead [3.2]
%
Rick Castle: I'm not saying I can speak with the dead. I'm just willing to admit that there are people in this world who are more sensitive than me.
Kate Beckett: Now, that's not hard to believe.
Rick Castle: [to Ryan] Walked right into that one.

  --  He's Dead, She's Dead [3.2]
%
Rick Castle: Oh, let me guess, you don't believe in fate. Soulmates?
Kate Beckett: No.
Rick Castle: Unicorns, fairies, double rainbows? Didn't you ever think your dolls used to get up at night and play with your toys?
Kate Beckett: Sorry.
Rick Castle: Mmm. Let me guess. You were one of those annoying six-year-olds who stopped believing in Santa Claus because you figured out he couldn't travel faster than the speed of light.
Kate Beckett: I was three, and we didn't have a chimney.

  --  He's Dead, She's Dead [3.2]
%
Kate Beckett: My gut says it's not him. But we still have to look into his alibi.
Rick Castle: Oh, so you don't believe in fate, yet your gut has magical properties. That's cool, Scully.

  --  He's Dead, She's Dead [3.2]
%
Alexis Castle: Can either of you look back on a relationship that ended because the thrill was gone and admit that maybe you gave up on love too soon? Dad, you're back with your ex-wife.
Rick Castle: Ooh! No, she's right. Yeah, with Gina, the thrill was long, long gone, but now, it is back with a vengeance. Of course, it brought along its friends, high-maintenance and shopaholic.

  --  He's Dead, She's Dead [3.2]
%
Kate Beckett: Why is it so important to you that I believe all this stuff about fates and psychics and Santa Claus?
Rick Castle: Because if you don't believe in even the possibility of magic, you'll never ever find it.

  --  He's Dead, She's Dead [3.2]
%
Alexis: [Bringing Castle breakfast in bed] Breakfast time!
Castle: Oh! What did I do to deserve this? Other than, you know, being... me.
Alexis: Isn't that enough?
[Alexis kisses him on the cheek, Castle chuckles]
Castle: Okay, what do you want?
Alexis: Nothing! Why do I have to want something?
Castle: March, 1999, you wanted a Hello Kitty backpack. I got French toast with a whipped-cream smiley face. October, 2004, you wanted a set of mint condition, Empire Strikes Back lightsabers. I got an omelet shaped like Darth Vader.

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
Castle: You were a girl once.
Beckett: [Smirks] Still am...
Castle: [Holding up a picture of Alexis sitting on a Vespa ] Can you tell me why my daughter wants one of these so badly?
Beckett: Oh, bikes are what girls want when we realize we're never gonna get a pony.

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
Beckett: [About Alexis wanting a scooter] You know what this means, though?
Castle: No. What?
Beckett: Well, Alexis is entering her "wild child" phase.
Castle: [Smiles indulgently] My daughter? Hah, I don't think so.
Beckett: Oh yeah, Castle, all girls go through it. And the good girls are the worst.
[Castle's smile slides off his face]

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
Random: I wasn't running away! I was jogging.
Beckett: So what were you doing climbing down the side of a building?
Random: Uh, Cross-training. [Nods sagely] Better cardiovascular workout.

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
Beckett: Did you kill Carver for the map?
Royce: Oh, come on, kid, you know me better than that.
Beckett: [Coldly, hurt] I don't think I do. Because the man I knew wouldn't betray me like this.
Royce: I gotta go.
Beckett: Mike. I was in love with you.
Royce: Oh, Kate. Don't.
Beckett: You were the only one who understood the obsession that drove me. Who didn't tell me that I would get over my mother's murder and that she wouldn't want me to do this.
Royce: [Shaking his head, sadly] Just - just trying to do right by you, kid.
Beckett: I dreamt about you. The night I shot the guy that killed my mother, I dreamt that I was the one who was on the ground dying, and that you came up to me and told me to stand up, 'cause there was still work to be done. [Longingly] When I woke up that morning I just wanted to call you, but we hadn't talked in so long.
Royce: You should've called. I never forgot.
Beckett: I'm going to catch Carver's killer, Royce. And then I'm going to recover Lloyd's score. And when I arrest you, you're going to realize that what you destroyed today was worth a hell of a lot more than money. [She hangs up. Speaks to Ryan, suddenly distant, and unemotional] Did I keep him on long enough?
Ryan: [Shocked] Uh, uh...
Esposito: Yeah, we got an address.
Beckett: All right, let's go.
Castle: Wh-what?  All of that was just an act, to get a trace?
Beckett: Of course. [She turns and walks out, her face contorting with silent tears]

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
[Beckett finds a bug in the victim's calculator]
Castle: A wireless RF transmitter, to be precise. Not to be confused with the more advanced infrared signal burst device.
Beckett: Book research?
Castle: Nanny Cam.

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
[Searching for the suspects in a cemetery]
Ryan: You know, if this were a horror movie, we'd be the first ones killed, splitting off like this.
Esposito: Yeah, except we are not a couple of top-heavy coeds out looking for fun. We're highly trained officers of the law with enough firepower to take out a horde of undead.
Ryan: Hispanic and cocky. Yeah, you'd definitely die first.

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
[A standoff at the cemetery...]
Beckett: Well, then maybe we should make sure the treasure's even there before we start shooting. Castle, do you mind?
Castle: Why me?
Beckett: 'Cause you're the only one without a gun.
Castle: [Looks around at everyone else] Good point.

  --  Under the Gun [3.3]
%
Ryan: He didn't kill Goldstein, but he did kill squirrel-stein. [Holds up a dead squirrel] What're the odds, huh?
Castle: Oh no, they took his clothes too!
Ryan: Could you...? [hands dead squirrel to officer]
Esposito: Awwwww!
Ryan: Yeah I know, I'm sorry.

  --  Punked [3.4]
%
Castle: Wonder what's up with Alexis. She seems a little out of it.
Martha: Isn't it obvious?
Castle: What?
Martha: Oh, she's in love.
Castle: Alexis?
Martha: Oh, come on, darling. In case you haven't noticed, she's not a little girl anymore.
Castle: Thank you, mother. I think if Alexis were in love she would've told me.
Martha: Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. The fact that she hasn't told you is how we know it's real.
Castle: [Warningly] Mother.
Martha: Okay. And the fact that she mentioned it to me last night.
Castle: Who is he? Where did she meet him?
Martha: Oh, I don't know. She wouldn't say. No, diva's honor. She didn't tell me anything. She didn't even tell me his name.
Castle: [Sulkily] Can't believe she told you and not me. I'm supposed to be her go-to guy.
Martha: Oh, darling, of course you are. It's just, you know, it's first love. It's magical, ethereal. It defies logic.
[Castle's phone rings. He ignores it, still sulking]
Martha: Richard, your phone.
Castle: [He shrugs] Mmm.
Martha: [Picks it up] Ah, Beckett. Maybe it's a nice murder, darling. Brighten your day.
[Castle starts to smile]
Martha: Good boy.
Castle: [Answers] Castle.

  --  Punked [3.4]
%
Castle: So, I wear boxers. What do you wear? Thong? Cheekies? I told you mine! Bloomers? Granny panties? [Eyes opening wide] Commando?

  --  Punked [3.4]
%
Castle: How do you know you're in love?
Beckett: All the songs make sense.

  --  Punked [3.4]
%
Castle: [ as the suspect runs away] Quick! He's heading for the time machine!

  --  Punked [3.4]
%
[Trying to identify the gun with the aid of an expert in antique guns]
Beckett: And how many people would own that kind of antique pistol?
Abe Sandrich: They're considered collectibles, so they don't have to be registered.
Castle: Making it pretty smart to kill someone with one.
Abe: Oh, yeah. Guns may be old, but they got plenty of killing left in 'em

  --  Punked [3.4]
%
Beckett: Are you getting mail here now?
Castle: Only when I don't want my daughter to see it. [opens the envelope to show 2 tickets for Taylor Swift concert] Laa...
Beckett: You're a Taylor Swift fan?
Castle: They are for Alexis. Cost me an arm and a leg, but Alexis will be thrilled. Apparently she and Ash have a song.
Beckett: Yeah, well we have a song as well.
Castle: We do?
Beckett: Uhuh. "You Talk Too Much" by Clarence Carter.

  --  Anatomy of a Murder [3.5]
%
Esposito: That was a nice thing you guys did in there.
Castle: Well, I just thought that after everything Greg did for her, they deserve a chance. Besides, if it were you and I in Amy's shoes, we'd still be rotting in prison.
Esposito: Huh, speak for yourself, bro. I'd escape.
Castle: What, you'd just leave me in there?
Esposito: It's the law of the jungle. I gotta look out for numero uno.
Castle: Wow. Nothing like a hypothetical prison term to let you know who your friends really are.
Beckett: Don't worry Castle, I'd get you out.

  --  Anatomy of a Murder [3.5]
%
Castle: Don't we usually get to the victim before the funeral?
Beckett: What have we got?
Esposito: Mourners found a body in the caskett
Castle: And that's unusual how?
Esposito: Well, the family was bidding a fond farewell to Mr. Mank here and discovered that he wasn't going to the grave alone.
Castle: Is it just me, or is Mr. Mank smiling?

  --  Anatomy of a Murder [3.5]
%
Esposito: I found something unusual. Almost every morning she bought coffee.
Ryan: A doctor that drinks coffee, wow that is unusual.
Esposito: It is. The coffee shop is twenty blocks from her apartment.
Castle: Maybe it was on her way to work?
Esposito: Nope, complete opposite direction.
Castle: Boyfriend in the neighborhood?
Esposito: Only one way to find out. (walks away)
Ryan: Great, now he's mad at me.

  --  Anatomy of a Murder [3.5]
%
[Ryan telling Castle what he found after checking up on Greg's alibi]
Ryan: ...So I spoke to more members of the staff and that's when I found...the others.
Castle: The others?
Ryan: The other women in what I call... [pulls out a second board] the Galaxy of Greg. Each one of these women orbits Greg and considers him to be her special friend.
Castle: Well, that totally makes him McSteamy!

  --  Anatomy of a Murder [3.5]
%
Roy Montgomery: For those of you living in a cave four years ago, the Triple Killer, or 3XK, got his nickname by strangling three women in a week, dropping out of sight for a month, and then killing three more. Then he disappeared. I served on the task force that investigated those six murders. An FBI profile was as close as we came to ID-ing the suspect. Feds say he's a white male, 25 to 45 years old...
Rick Castle: [to Beckett, sotto voce] Could be me.
Roy Montgomery: ...with a dysfunctional relationship with his mother....
Rick Castle: [to Beckett, sotto voce] Still me.
Roy Montgomery: He has a menial, unimportant job.
Kate Beckett: [to Castle, sotto voce] Definitely you.
Rick Castle: Just for that, I'm basing my next book on Esposito.

  --  3XK [3.6]
%
Martha Rodgers: It's like when I was doing Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf and I thought my understudy was trying to poison me.
Rick Castle: Oh, yeah, the daily blood tests I paid for. Wait, she did poison you. The Swiss chocolate she gave you was a laxative.
Martha Rodgers: Eh, added a certain urgency to my performance. But the point is, you indulged my paranoia. So therefore I'm going to be in the park, five o'clock, at a discreet distance to make sure that Alexis' secret admirer is not an axe murderer.

  --  3XK [3.6]
%
Jerry Tyson: Oh, you really don't know me at all, do you?
Rick Castle: Oh, it's not complicated. You were raised by a single mother. She was blonde. Oh, she was beautiful, but she never wanted you. When you were, what, twelve, I'm guessing, she died suddenly. Let's say, drug overdose. You go into foster care. The bad kind. You have so much hate, so much hate towards your mother for abandoning you that you kill these women to get back at her. But you leave them looking peaceful because as much as you hated your mother, you loved your mother. Am I getting warm?
Jerry Tyson: You're drawn to death. You like to be around it, 'cause it thrills you. Now where does that come from? Your own suppressed impulses? How close to death do you want to get, huh?

  --  3XK [3.6]
%
Kate Beckett: Tell me something, Castle. Why did he let you live?
Rick Castle: As punishment, for me ruining his plan. Now he's gonna kill again, all 'cause I couldn't stop him. And I feel so...
Kate Beckett: I know the feeling.
Rick Castle: I know you do.

  --  3XK [3.6]
%
Rick Castle: I can't believe you got dressed up for this. Tell me again why Ryan and Esposito couldn't come with you.
Kate Beckett: We all agreed, as Volunteer Assistant Homicide Detective you could really sink your teeth into this avenue of investigation. And they called "not it."
Rick Castle: You know, ever since I've been following you, I've been dreaming of the day that you'd say, "Let's go to the strip club and get this dirt bag." I just never imagined it would feel like this.
Kate Beckett: Let me know if you need any singles.

  --  Almost Famous [3.7]
%
Kevin Ryan: Hans was right. We found a flower shop that confirmed weekly deliveries for the past four months.
Rick Castle: I knew if we beat on Mannschaft something would pop.
Kate Beckett: Who were they sent to?
Kevin Ryan: They were charged to an AmEx belonging to Rebecca Dalton, 48. She lives at 63rd and Madison.
Javier Esposito: Yo. Check this out. Fortune 500 lists Rebecca Dalton's husband as having a publishing empire in 2005. Says here that Rebecca used to be a runway model.
Rick Castle: She's married. Juicy.
Javier Esposito: Not anymore. Her husband died a couple of years ago, left his entire fortune to his grieving wife.
Rick Castle: Even more juicy. Rebecca marries young, spends her twenties and thirties under the thumb of a rich yet domineering husband. Well, he dies, leaving our aging beauty finally freed from the shackles of a loveless marriage. One night, she's out with her ex-model posse. She meets a very charming, very handsome Derek. For the first time in years, she feels alive again. The relationship reaches its inevitable conclusion when Derek meets someone closer to his own age. Well, the heartache has Rebecca so distraught that she kills Derek in a jealous rage. If she couldn't have him, well, then no one could.
Kevin Ryan: Did you go home and watch Sunset Boulevard before your little trip to The Package Store?
Kate Beckett: Thank you for your always entertaining stories, but I think we will get a lot closer to the truth if we just ask Rebecca a few questions tomorrow morning.
Rick Castle: It's good though, right?
Kevin Ryan: Yeah, I liked it.

  --  Almost Famous [3.7]
%
Martha Rodgers: This is the best thing that has ever happened to you. Rejection is the bedrock of a great acting career. Until an actor has suffered, he hasn't really lived.
Alexis Castle: Thanks, Gram.
Martha Rodgers: You're welcome. And besides, auditions are like men. There's another one right around the corner.

  --  Almost Famous [3.7]
%
Beckett: Okay Castle, I'm here; what's so important?
Castle: Your first clue is: "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime".
Beckett: Oh, Jeez, Castle, I haven't even had my coffee yet - (he hands her a cup of coffee) Thank you.
Castle: From the Sherlock Holmes stories, Silver Blaze. Holmes unmasks the murderer because of what didn't happen. The dog didn't bark. That's how he knew: the dog must have known the killer.
Beckett: Okay, yes, I remember the story.
Castle: Then you know that the hardest form of detection is looking for the thing that isn't there. Byron said that Len was going to verify the hawks. Verify, as in provide proof, which means...
Beckett: He would've had a camera!
Castle: Which we didn't find. And if he was taking pictures...
Beckett: We should be able to figure out what he was up to!

  --  Murder Most Fowl [3.8]
%
Castle: You know, I understand ferrets as a pet. Snakes, spiders, even a hairless mole. But a rat?
Beckett: There are probably kids in the city who keep cockroaches as pets.
Castle: You're probably right. Strangest pet you ever had?
Beckett: You.

  --  Murder Most Fowl [3.8]
%
Castle: [holding a DVD] Wait! That's it? I mean, no pomp? No circumstance? What's on this could shape the foundations of our very existence. We need to pause and savor-
Beckett: [taking the DVD] Please, let's just stick it in and get this over with. I mean, the fact of the matter is there probably nothing of any value on that CD to our investiga-
[image of a craft in space comes up on the screen]
Castle: You were saying?
Beckett: [in whisper] No way!

  --  Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind [3.9]
%
[Castle and Beckett had been captured, interrogated and injected by government agents the night before]
Beckett: Those men knew who killed Marie and they refused to tell us.
Castle: They also refused to confirm that J. Edgar Hoover liked to wear dresses.
Esposito: [walking up and checking out the injection marks on their necks] Abducted by government agents, huh? [grins] Come on. What were you two really doing?
Beckett: [rolls eyes] It's not a hickey, Esposito.
Esposito: You both have one.
Castle: I wish it was a hickey. [Beckett looks up with a small smile] It's from the injectors.
Esposito: Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
Castle: They were Men in Black!
...
[Ryan walks up to Castle, Beckett and Esposito]
Ryan: Hey. Are those hickeys?
Esposito: Yes.
Beckett: No.
Castle: I wish.

  --  Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind [3.9]
%
Beckett: [Showing a photo to two Chinese men she holds at gunpoint] Have you seen this man?
Castle: [In Chinese] My partner is crazy and may start firing at any moment.
[They point]
Beckett: Go. Go! [They run] Semester abroad?
Castle: No. A TV show I used to love.
Beckett: Huh. Nice job.
Castle: Thanks.

  --  Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind [3.9]
%
[A captured suspect begins chewing on something]
Castle: Cyanide capsule! [pries the object from the suspect's mouth, inspects it with a flashlight, sees it's chewing gum] ...Ew!

  --  Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind [3.9]
%
[Examining the altitude chamber]
Beckett: What would happen if a person went inside?
Ms. Holder: Without protective gear?
Beckett: Mmm-hmm.
Ms. Holder: Your lungs rupture from gas expansion, and all the liquid in your body evaporates.
Castle: So, all the horrible effects of outer space, without the view.

  --  Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind [3.9]
%
Castle: Where do you come down on deficit spending during an economic downturn?
[Hands Beckett her coffee]
Beckett: [Taking the coffee] Thank you. I take the theory that's held by most economists, that deficit spending is acceptable as long as it focuses on public investment, like infrastructure, defense, education, research.
Castle: Wow! Where did that answer come from?
Beckett: A semester of Economic Theory at NYU. Where did that question come from?
Castle: Trying out conversation starters.

  --  Close Encounters of the Murderous Kind [3.9]
%
[After entering a sewer discovered next to a basement.]
Beckett: This must be part of the old sewer system.
Castle: Probably the exact sewer system --- This is incredible, isn't it?
Beckett: Yeah! Aside from the fact that it's damp, cramped, dark, and we're almost certainly walking in rat poop. [high pitched] Awesome.

  --  Last Call [3.10]
%
[Examining a body they found in the river]
Lanie: ...so I'd say no, this was no boating accident.
Castle: Then we'd better close the beaches. [Lanie and Becket give him confused looks]"No boating accident"? Chief Brody? Hooper? [the women are still confused] Seriously?

  --  Last Call [3.10]
%
[Castle walks into the station carrying two coffees. Natalie is writing on the "murder board", Beckett eyes at her uneasily]
Natalie: [Takes a coffee] Thanks, Castle!
Castle: [Stunned at her audacity] Tha-that's, I was- uh... you're welcome?
[Beckett looks shocked and distraught]
Castle: So, where are we?
Natalie: Ryan and Esposito are digging into Tanya Wellington.
Castle: [Directly addressing Beckett] Mmm, what about Duke Jones? Did his neighbor confirm his romantic evening?
Beckett: He-
Natalie: [Cuts her off] So did a couple of other neighbors, who complained about the noise. So it looks like Duke Jones allibis out.
Beckett: [Put out] What she said. [To Castle] Can we talk for a second?
Castle: Sure.
[Beckett loops her arm through his and quickly leaves the room, ending up frantically dragging him into another room]
Beckett: She took my coffee, Castle!
Castle: It's just coffee.
Beckett: Then what's next? My soul?! Everything I do, she does. Even when I'm thinking I can feel her in my head like some kind of a brain-eating parasite from one of her movies!

  --  Nikki Heat [3.11]
%
[Natalie walks in dressed up as Beckett, with a brunette wig and similar suit. Castle's and Beckett's jaws drop.]
Castle: Just like I dreamed it! [They both stare at him] Did I say that out-loud?

  --  Nikki Heat [3.11]
%
Natalie: Is Castle gay?
Beckett: [So shocked that she spits out her coffee] I'm sorry, what? No. No!
Natalie: Then you two are an item, but you're sworn to secrecy, right?
Beckett: No, we are not an item. Why?
Natalie: [Sighs] Last night I invited him back to my place. And he said something to me I have never heard from a man before.
Beckett: What?
Natalie: "No."
Beckett: [Raises her eyebrows] No?
Natalie: I don't get it! He's into you, but you're determined not to give into these feelings that you clearly have for him. So he fantasizes about you through his writing. It's literally verbal masturbation.
Beckett: Uh-okay, so what does this have to do with me?
Natalie: [Indicates her "Beckett costume"] I am not wearing this getup for my health. You're Nikki Heat, he's Jameson Rook. I need to sleep with him in the name of character research. Can you talk to him?
Beckett: And say what?
Natalie: [Shrugs] I dunno, give him permission or something.
[Beckett is momentarily speechless]
Beckett: I have to go. Over there. [She disappears in a random direction]

  --  Nikki Heat [3.11]
%
Beckett: [Watching Natalie at the murder board] Do I really do that?
Castle: Yes, and it's adorable.
Beckett: If it's so adorable, why didn't you sleep with me? [Castle looks momentarily puzzled] Her me, not me me.
Castle: Oh, well a fictional character that I wrote, based on you, played by Natalie Rhodes? It's just way too... meta.
Beckett: [mouthing] Meta?
Ryan: [walks in] We should have a code word so we all know what Beckett to kill when the clone army attacks.
Beckett: Unless we make a preventive strike.
Castle: Get through to Jenny yet?
Ryan: She's still not picking up.
Beckett: Don't worry, you'll be laughing about it soon enough.
Castle: We are.
Ryan: Thanks. So I've been running through all Stacy's clients files. Three couples had filed for divorce within the last month, can you believe it? You marry the love of your life and next thing you know they're cheating on you.
Beckett: Ryan.
Ryan: Sorry, anyway two of the guys have rock-solid alibies and the third divorce has nothing to do with cheating.
Esposito: [walks in] What you guys doing?
Ryan: Hiding from creepy Beckett.
Beckett: We are not hiding!

  --  Nikki Heat [3.11]
%
Castle: I never pegged you for a magic fan. You know any good tricks?
Beckett: I do this one thing... with ice cubes.

  --  Poof! You're Dead [3.12]
%
Castle: I wonder how Zalman did it. Must've whipped something from Jerome's pocket with a receipt for his weekend of sin.
Beckett: Like this? (Holds up Castle's phone.)
Castle: (Gasps.) You had your hand in my pocket and I didn't even feel it? Do it again.

  --  Poof! You're Dead [3.12]
%
Beckett: [To a suspect who is also a street magician] We need to talk to you about Zalman Drake.
Chuck: Abracadabra. [throws smoke bomb at his feet, vanishes]
Beckett: [Opens the lid of the platform he was standing on, pulls him out] Alakazam, jackass.

  --  Poof! You're Dead [3.12]
%
Beckett: So where's Esposito?
Ryan: Ha, take a wild guess.
Beckett & Castle: Lanie.
Ryan: Can't believe they still think that none of us know.
Castle: Well, let's let em keep thinking that a while longer. The bubble bursts soon enough.
Beckett: Not if you're in it with the right person.

  --  Poof! You're Dead [3.12]
%
Kate Beckett: Tell me what I don't know about my mom's murder.
John Raglan: Everybody drinks their coffee outta cardboard cups these days or those plastic travel mugs. But there's, there's something about the way ceramic warms your hands that... It's weird the things you notice. I just got the long face from the doc. Lymphoma. Six months.
Kate Beckett: Sorry to hear about that.
John Raglan: Every year around the holidays, they ... They run that "Christmas Carol" on local TV. When I was a kid, I remember Jacob Marley scared the hell out of me. Forced to drag that, that chain around in the next world.
Rick Castle: "I wear the chain I forged in life."
John Raglan: "I made it link by link." I hid a lot of sins behind my badge. And now I gotta carry 'em. But your mother's case ... That one weighs a ton.

  --  Knockdown [3.13]
%
Martha: I heard about the shooting on the news. Could have been you. You know that, don't you?
[1]

  --  Knockdown [3.13]
%
[After Lockwood abducts Ryan and Esposito]
Hal Lockwood: Now, I'm going to make you a deal. You tell me what I need to know, one pro to another, and I will put a bullet in your brain. You don't, you jerk me around, and you will be begging me to before this night is up.
[Ryan and Esposito turn to each other briefly]
Esposito: I'm going to have to go with option B.
Ryan: Oh, yeah. We're definitely going to jerk you around.

  --  Knockdown [3.13]
%
Beckett: Castle told me that you decided to give the money back?
Martha: Yeah, well, I tried. Chet's kids refused to take it. They said their father loved me, wanted me to have the money. So, I'm, you know, trying to figure out what to do with it. Everything I come up with seems so selfish and petty.
Beckett: Well, it doesn't have to be that way. You know, someone once told me that money doesn't change you, it just magnifies who you are. You cared about Chet. Maybe you could do something that would honor his memory somehow.

  --  Lucky Stiff [3.14]
%
[Interrupting the Page brothers song recording]
Page: What the hell, yo? That was slamming.
Castle: [Speaking into the intercom]
Three armed cops and a writer makes four.
You're under arrest, so get on the floor.

  --  Lucky Stiff [3.14]
%
Castle: The butler really did do it!

  --  Lucky Stiff [3.14]
%
Castle I know what you would do if you won the lottery.
Beckett By all means, please come in. So, what is your big insight into a financial decision I will never have to make?
Castle You would use the money to honor your mother's legacy. On the way over here I called the dean of your mom's old school and we talked about starting a scholarship in Johanna Beckett's name. One that will provide a full ride for students planning on dedicating their careers to those in the legal system without a voice, the kind of people your mom championed. And, with your blessing, I would like to host a fundraiser to fund it.
Beckett You just can't stay out of my personal life, can you? [Castle looks at her with fearful eyes; she smiles] Thank you, it's really sweet.

  --  Lucky Stiff [3.14]
%
Castle: I don't care about statistics. I am telling you Damian is not capable of murder.
Beckett: You know, I could say that about maybe three people that I've met in my entire life. What is it about this guy that warrants this unshakeable faith that you have in him?
Castle: When I was fourteen, my mom sent me to Edgewick Academy. I was homesick and I didn't have any friends, so I wrote about it. One day I submitted a story to the literary magazine. Damian Westlake was the editor.
Beckett: And he published it.
Castle: More than that. He called me down to his office. He sat me down and he said, "Ricky, you have a great talent." No one had ever said anything like that to me before. Damian, he encouraged me, he critiqued me, he always made me dig a little deeper. Without Damian Westlake, I'm a lawyer, I'm a grifter, I'm a rodeo clown, but I'm not a writer. Without him, I'm not me.

  --  The Final Nail [3.15]
%
[After telling Damian that they also found the man who killed his father years ago]
Damian: Wow, this is... It is pretty overwhelming. I got a plane to catch, so maybe we should just talk about this later.
Castle: Michael told the cops you got in touch with him. Asked him if he wanted to make a lot of money for one night's work. You gave him your Rolex and your car as a down payment. When your inheritance came through, he got a half million dollars and a one-way ticket to Los Angeles. He still has your Rolex...and a map that you drew of your father's house, with a path leading straight to his bedroom.
Damian: Rick, he's lying.
Castle: [voice hardening] Tell me you didn't do it.
Damian: Ricky, I...
Castle: Tell me I haven't been believing in you all this time for nothing.
[doorbell rings]
Castle: That's them. Detective Salazar and some New York detectives. They're here to take you in. [rising up from his seat] I told them you'd be a gentleman.

  --  The Final Nail [3.15]
%
Beckett: "Show me a hero and I'll write you a tragedy." F. Scott Fitzgerald said that.
Castle: Then it must have been Ernest Hemingway who said, "Man, I sure could use a drink right about now."
Beckett: Lead the way. I'm buying.

  --  The Final Nail [3.15]
%
[As Esposito, Beckett and Castle move toward the body]
Esposito: Everything points to him being popped for cash and car parts.
Lanie: Not everything, baby
Beckett: [whispering] Did you just call him "baby?"
Lanie: Ooh. Did I?
Castle: [mouthing] You did.

  --  Setup [3.16]
%
Lanie: He was killed at 11:15
Castle: So specific. I'm impressed.
Lanie: His watch broke when he fell.
Castle: You shouldn't have told me. Less impressed.
[Lanie gives him an annoyed glance]

  --  Setup [3.16]
%
[As they open Amir's storage unit]
Castle: What do you think is in there?
Beckett: I don't know. May be empty, like Al Copone's vault.
Castle: No, think of all the amazing things that are found in storage units at times like this. [spreading his arms out] "Ark of the Covenant, Dr. Jones?"

  --  Setup [3.16]
%
[Speaking with Homeland Security agent Fallon about the case]
Montgomery: Just so I'm clear, are you taking over?
Fallon: This is your case. I'm just here to lend support however I can.
Esposito: Yo, Cap. ICE just sent over the immigration papers for Amir Alhabi. He got a degree in electrical engineering from a school in Damascus.
Fallon: What was he working on in Syria?
Ryan: I got that one. I just spoke with the State Department. They debriefed Amir when he first landed here. They say he was working on a weapons program for the Syrians.
Montgomery: Nuclear weapons?
Ryan: Yeah
Fallon: Okay. Now I'm taking over

  --  Setup [3.16]
%
Castle: How's Josh?
Beckett: Fine. He's He's on his way to Haiti to do another Doctors Without Borders mission.
Castle: How long?
Beckett: I don't know. It's so funny, Castle. You know, at first, I loved that he was so busy. It just It just gave me an opportunity to keep one foot out the door, just in case.
Castle: But with one foot out the door, it's hard to know where you stand.
Beckett: And even if I did, I mean, what does it mean? He's out there, he's saving people. How do you even compete with that?
Castle: You can't. No. No one can.
Beckett: That's one of the things that attracted me to him the most. That passion. That drive. Why is it that the thing that attracts you to a person always ends up being that thing that just drives you crazy? I just wish that it I wish that I had someone who would be there for me, and I could be there for him, and we could just dive into it together.

  --  Setup [3.16]
%
Castle: What's your take on Fallon?
Beckett: Smart cop, driven, killer instinct. As a person, kind of a douche.

  --  Setup [3.16]
%
Martha: [to Richard] You haven't heard of the Serenity?

  --  Setup [3.16]
%
[As they are freezing to death]
Beckett: Castle.
Castle: Yeah?
Beckett: [Reaching up to him] Thank you for being there.
Castle: Always

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
[Explaining how they found Beckett and Castle]
Ryan: We thought you must be out there doing something incredibly stupid against orders, so we sent patrol units everywhere we figured you'd be moronic enough to go. Found Beckett's car, and we searched the area until we found the light from the storage container. [Bumps fists with Esposito]
Castle: Well, I'm glad my stupidity's predictable.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
Fallon: You two. Are you always this stubborn and insubordinate?
Castle: Only when we're trying to save the world.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
Castle: He's not wrong, you know. Used to be we go to war, everybody sacrifices, everybody pitches in. Now, you don't even see it on the news. [Montgomery gives him a critical look] I'm not defending him. I'm just saying I understand the anger.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
[Fallon and Beckett interrogating Radford in order to find the bomb]
Fallon: Do you see yourself as a great hero, doing this for a mighty cause? You think that's how people are going to see you? Because, I'll tell you right now, brother, if you let this happen, you're going to go down in history as America's greatest mass murderer. Is that what you want?
Radford: When this bomb goes off, do you think they're going to be looking at me? People will see this as an act of terrorism, so they will be looking for a terrorist. Not a patriot. Not one of their own.
Fallon: Is that what you think you are? A patriot? There's a word for people like you, it's not "patriot." It's "traitor".
Radford: The powers that be have no use for a traitor. So when they find their terrorist, and they will find their terrorist, what do you think will happen to me? [Fallon shrugs] Well, let me tell you, because I know them, I know how they think. I will become a footnote in one of your files, buried so far back no one will ever find it, because anything more would be an inconvenience to their self-serving, rabble-rousing narrative.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
[After the failed interrogation]
Fallon: We needed him to break, I saw an opening, I took it.
Beckett: You violated his rights.
Fallon: I can think of probably a dozen federal lawyers that would disagree with that. He was never in any real danger. I removed the bullets from my clip. The gun wasn't even loaded.
Beckett: Well, mine was.
Fallon: Yeah, well, I was pretty sure you weren't going to shoot me.
Beckett: You know, next time I wouldn't be so sure

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
Beckett: You should have seen his face. Because he stopped, he looked at me, he grabbed all the wires, and then he just yanked them.
[Laughter]
Ryan: All of them?
Castle: I figured one of them had to be the right one...
Montgomery: You know, the Mayor wants to give you guys a medal. I didn't have the heart to tell him you had no clue what you were doing.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
Fallon: ...But thanks to you two, we won't have to add the murder of innocent New Yorkers to that allegation
Beckett: Well, we were just doing our job. [pause] Actually, I was doing my job - I don't know what the hell he was doing.
Castle: Hey! [beat] But that's true.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
Beckett: [locked in freezing storage container] I always thought, being a cop, I'd take a bullet. I never thought I'd freeze to death.
Castle: Hey, we're not dead yet.
Beckett: I just wish this was one of your books. Then you could re-write the ending.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
Castle: I need you girls to do something, for me. But I don't want you to ask any questions. I want you to go to the Hamptons. I want you to stay there for the weekend.
Martha: Richard, what is this about?
Castle: Did you not... that's a question. look, there might be, um... an event that would make it very dangerous to stay in the city.
[Alexis starts dialing her phone]
Castle: What are you doing?
Alexis: Calling Ashley.
Castle: No, no, no, no. You can't tell anybody. Okay? You can't tell anybody. You tell Ashley, he'll tell his parents, they'll call someone they love, and a panic will make this thing a thousand times harder to stop.
Alexis: Dad, he's my boyfriend.
Castle: I know.
Alexis: This isn't fair. You can't...
Castle: Fair has nothing to do with it. I need to you go. Now.
Martha: But you'll come, too?
Castle: I will when I can. But I need you to go. Now.

  --  Countdown [3.17]
%
Rick Castle: Why would anyone want to kill a writer?
Kate Beckett: Oh, so many reasons.
Rick Castle: Or maybe Sarah discovered that Greek billionaire Mikos had invented a machine that could cause blizzards that would plunge the entire world into an ice age.
Kate Beckett: Really? You're gonna go with a evil weather machine?
Rick Castle: It already happened. On General Hospital. Look, bear in mind, we're entering into a world of epic drama with larger than life characters, each one teaming with twisted secrets and personal intrigue. It stands to reason that the motive for this murder will be worthy of a soap opera.
Kate Beckett: Castle, even in a world of epic drama, the motives are usually quite ordinary.

  --  One Life to Lose [3.18]
%
Martha Rodgers: [after Castle asks if she knew Lance Hastings] He was my love interest thirty years ago. On screen. And off. After my character married his character, Joseph Fox, she was kidnapped, buried alive, trapped in a cave with bears, kidnapped again, and held hostage in the sewers of Paris.
Kate Beckett: How long were you on the show?
Martha Rodgers: Three weeks.

  --  One Life to Lose [3.18]
%
Javier Esposito: I know she's a murder suspect, but you got to admit she is smoking hot.
Rick Castle: Agreed. So hot, in fact, that it led to a torrid affair with Sarah's director husband. Sarah found out about it, decided to kill off Mandy's character. Doesn't get any soapier than that.
Javier Esposito: Well, obviously, you haven't seen Chiquitas.
Rick Castle: As in bananas?
Javier Esposito: No. As in the telenovela. I used to watch it growing up with my grandmother. Bro, there was this one episode where Gabriella discovered that her husband was sleeping with her evil twin sister, Teresita, only to later find out that she had multiple personality disorder.
Rick Castle: Wait, does that even qualify as cheating?
Javier Esposito: Dude.
Rick Castle: What?
Javier Esposito: Don't overthink it.

  --  One Life to Lose [3.18]
%
Johnny Dimes: I'm a P.I. Sarah Cutler was a client. What do you mean, she's dead?
Rick Castle: She's dead. Only really has the one meaning.
Kate Beckett: Did she hire you to follow her husband?
Johnny Dimes: Husband? No. She hired me to investigate Gloria Chambers.
Rick Castle: The mom. I knew it. Was she involved in organ harvesting?
Johnny Dimes: That didn't really come up. But I can tell you this, Gloria Chambers isn't her real birth mom. She's a fake.
Rick Castle: Oh. The mom isn't really the mom? Does it get any soapier than that?

  --  One Life to Lose [3.18]
%
Kate Beckett: Okay, so Gloria is in the clear. Uniforms showed her photo at the OTB, and a bartender there remembers seeing her at 11:15.
Rick Castle: You know, I can see why she fell for Gloria's con. Sarah was motherless, childless. She was taking young writers under her wing. She was looking for family.
Kate Beckett: Wow, Castle. That's a refreshingly down-to-earth theory.
Rick Castle: Just trying to keep you on your toes.

  --  One Life to Lose [3.18]
%
Kate Beckett: Maybe Sarah was having an affair.
Rick Castle: Well, that makes perfect sense. Sarah was separated from her husband, Vince. And after long, grueling days at work, she'd go home to a cold, empty apartment. Feeling lonely, betrayed, she seeks comfort in the arms of this mystery man.
Kate Beckett: And she decides that she wants her husband back, so she writes his mistress, Mandy Bronson, off the show in order to save their marriage.
Rick Castle:And her next step would be to get rid of the other man.
Kate Beckett: So maybe the other man didn't go off quietly into the night.
Kevin Ryan:Do you two practice this when we're not around?

  --  One Life to Lose [3.18]
%
Kate Beckett: Okay, found the deal memo Sarah signed in order to get Lance out for his movie.
Rick Castle: He wasn't lying. My mother's never going to let me forget this.
Kate Beckett: Oh, come on, Castle. She'll probably think it was sweet that you were concerned about her.
Rick Castle: This is Martha Rogers we are talking about. I intruded on her "moment." No, I will pay dearly.
Kate Beckett: When Lance came here, Sarah told him that someone wasn't who she thought they were. Who do you think that was?
Rick Castle: How about the woman who makes my mother look like a saint?
Kate Beckett: Yeah, but Sarah already cut Gloria out of her life. Maybe ... Maybe it was her cheating husband.
Rick Castle: Except Lance met with Sarah after Mandy Bronson. By the time Mandy showed up, Sarah'd already decided what she wanted to do with her marriage.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, but even if Sarah decided that she was gonna get back together with Vince, it doesn't mean that she didn't have doubts.
Rick Castle: No. No, you're right. Except he has an alibi. Everyone has an alibi.
Kate Beckett: Yeah, well, somebody out there doesn't, and we are gonna find them.
Rick Castle: [looking at his watch] Maybe we should sleep on it. [Beckett looks at him] Separately. Katherine Beckett, I never...

  --  One Life to Lose [3.18]
%
Rick Castle: Why were there news vans out front?
Kate Beckett: Because of who our victim is. Joe McUsic.
Rick Castle: Who?
Kate Beckett: Juror number seven in the Lyla Addison case.
Rick Castle: The Addison case? Seriously? What happened?
Kate Beckett: He dropped dead during the closing argument. Lanie thinks that he was poisoned.
Rick Castle: [pulls out his phone and starts texting] Heir to the Addison fortune is murdered and, during the trial, a juror is murdered as well. This has all the makings of a John Grisham novel.
Kate Beckett: What are you doing?
Rick Castle: I'm texting my poker group, calling dibs on this story.

  --  Law & Murder [3.19]
%
[Seeing a suspect on surveillance footage giving a coffee to the victim]
Castle: Looks like he makes a killer Cappuccino! [Beckett gives him a glance] Too soon...

  --  Law & Murder [3.19]
%
[The D.A. is furious about his administrative assistant is being called in without informing him]
Montgomery: You called the D.A.'s personal assitant without informing him?
Beckett: Sir, I'm sorry, I was...
Montgomery: Smart move! Well you see what just happened? He could have called and asked why his assistant was here, but he came in personally.
Beckett: He wanted to stop the interview!
Castle: He's hiding something!

  --  Law & Murder [3.19]
%
Castle: Ordell Williams was right, it's a consp... [seeing Beckett writing "Conspiracy" on the murder board] ...iracy...
Beckett: I agree. I know, weird...
Castle: Yeah, weird, but ... good, because that's just the tip of the iceberg. Are you ready for the Titanic?

  --  Law & Murder [3.19]
%
Ryan: Cowards die many times before their death. The valiant never taste of death but once.
Esposito: Bro, you're not Castle.
Ryan: Yeah, I know I'm not Castle.
Esposito: Then stop trying to talk like him.
Ryan: What, I'm not allowed to reference the Bard? I'm a renaissance man.
Esposito: Memorizing one quote does not make you a renaissance man.
Ryan: What if I memorize two?
Esposito: Have you? Memorized two?
Ryan: No. But what if I did?
Esposito: Depends on the quote.

  --  Law & Murder [3.19]
%
[Seeing the victim's body in the oven.]
Beckett: Okay. That is really...
Castle: Well done.
Lanie: Another couple of hours, maybe. But luckily for me he's only half-baked.
[Beckett gives her a look]

  --  Slice of Death [3.20]
%
Ralph Carbone: You gotta be kidding me!
Nick Jr.: Dad, these are the cops.
Castle: You must be Authentic Nick.
Ralph: The one and only.
Beckett: Nick? I have the proprietor listed as Ralph Carbone.
Ralph: Yeah, that's me. Everybody calls me Nick.
Beckett: Why?
Ralph: Because that's what everybody calls me.

  --  Slice of Death [3.20]
%
Ralph: They're thieves. They live off of our name. And they're not even real Nicks. I'm the only real Nick.
Castle: And your real name is Ralph.
Ralph: Exactly.

  --  Slice of Death [3.20]
%
Beckett: You had a lot of imaginary friends growing up, didn't you?
Castle: Still do.

  --  Slice of Death [3.20]
%
Beckett: Castle, never underestimate the power of a woman on a mission.
Castle: No, I don't. And I have the alimony checks to prove it.

  --  Slice of Death [3.20]
%
Castle: [coming home to find Martha comforting Alexis] What happened?
Martha: Alexis decided to crash Lauren's party, against our better judgment.
Castle: And I take it that the, uh, party crashing didn't go so well?
Alexis: None of this would have happened if Lauren wasn't the most conniving bitch in the entire world.
Castle: Whoa!
Martha: [waving it off] It's warranted.
Alexis: When the band was performing, Lauren brought Ashley up on stage with her, and she kissed him. In front of everyone!
Castle: [shocked] Bitch!

  --  Slice of Death [3.20]
%
Montgomery: You really think she (Bridget McManus) could overpower Zack (Zack Lindsey)?
Ryan: Uh, no, but her brothers could. In grand Irish tradition, she has four of them, each over 6 foot, each with his own claim to fame... Assaults...
Castle: Oh.
Ryan: Ag. Assault...
Castle: Bad.
Ryan: A.D.W.,
Castle: Ee.
Ryan: Battery...
Castle: Mm.
Ryan: Assault on a city employee, parking enforcement.
Castle: Doesn't count.
Montgomery: Easy.
Ryan: Dude.
Castle: I... just jokes.

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Castle: He wants to learn more about my writing process.
Martha: And by "writing process" you mean your procrastination until the very last second...
Alexis: And then writing out of a desperate panic in a caffeine-induced haze.
Martha: That one?
Castle: No, not that one. [Alexis giggles] The one where I find authenticity by doing hands-on research with the NYPD.

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Castle: This place looks like my first apartment. We used to have cockroach races. I wonder if that's how Kafka got the idea?

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Beckett: For all we know, Bridget was lying.
Ryan: [Walks in, looking vaguely disheveled] Well, she wasn't lying about her brothers. Talked to all four of them, one Irishman to another... and another. Anyway, they alibied out, they were in New Paults when Zach was killed.
Beckett: All of them? [Ryan nods] For what?
Ryan: [Furtively] They were at a sporting event, of sorts. [Starts to leave]
Beckett: [Stopping him] Which was...?
Ryan: Leprechaun toss. [Esposito smirks] Don't ask!  Anyway, the, uh, older brother, he got first place. [Realizes his jacket sleeve is torn] Aww, man!
Castle: Well, the "merits" of Irish culture aside...
Ryan: Hey!
Castle: Sorry. Perhaps this suggests Bridget was telling the truth about our elusive Estonian.

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Alex Conrad: Hey, uh, if it's not overstepping, just in the interest of keeping it real, I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions for the case I'm coming up with for Seriously Dead.
Beckett: [Hands him her card] Why don't you just give me a buzz when the two of you are done.
Conrad: [To Castle] I mean, if it's okay with you.
Castle: [Glares at Beckett] Why wouldn't it be okay?
Beckett: Okay.
Conrad: Okay.
[Cut to Castle at home with Martha and Alexis]
Castle: It's so not okay! After everything I've done for him, he goes and tries to steal my muse!
Alexis: Muse thievery, what's the punishment for that? Five to ten in mythology jail?

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Beckett: Yeah, speaking of mentor, I heard that you guys were pretty hard on Conrad last night.
Castle: Hard on him?  No, no, it was just a little friendly hazing.
Beckett: To hear him describe it, it sounds like someone was trying to teach him a lesson.
Castle: [Laughs in a forced manner] What? Why would I want to do that?
Beckett: Because you didn't want him to spend time with me?
Castle: That is completely-
Beckett: True?
Castle: [Drops his false humor] Yes. Fine, it's true. I'm jealous. There, I said it. I-I want you all to myself, and to have you spending time with another writer? That upsets me! And if that makes me petty, so be it. Guilty as charged.
Beckett: [Smiles] Actually, I kinda think it's sweet.
Castle: You do?
Beckett: I do. And that's why you don't have to worry about me hanging around with Conrad anymore. From now on I'm a "one writer" girl.

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Castle: Thank you.
Beckett: Always.

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Castle: I finally know what Obi-Wan Kenobi felt like when Darth Vader turned on him.

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
Captain Roy Montgomery: [watching Beckett in Interrogation] She's like a tiger in there. I never get tired of watching her.
Castle: Me neither.

  --  The Dead Pool [3.21]
%
[Castle and Beckett have been caught breaking into a house in L.A.]
Beckett: Are you arresting us?
LAPD Detective Kyle Sieger: Much worse. Somebody wants to have a word with you. [pulls out his phone] You're on speaker sir.
Montgomery: [via phone] Breaking into people's houses, that's your idea of a vacation, Beckett?
Beckett: Sir, I can explain, I was...
Montgomery: No you cannot. What you can do is get your ass on the next flight out.
Castle: Uh, we have a dinner reservation at Sebago, is the morning ok?
Montgomery: Oh this is all a big joke to you, isn't it Castle? But when Beckett is working mall security, I guess following her around isn't going to have quite the same allure. Both of you, come home now.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
[after a failed meeting with the killer]
Castle: So what happened? [Beckett stomps up and pokes him hard in the chest] Ow!
Beckett: I was trying to keep him from seeing you, and so I pushed too hard and he made me. He called me green Castle, what the hell were you doing?!
Castle: I saw his phone in the cabana, I thought it was worth the risk.
Beckett: You took his phone?
Castle: No! No, I took a picture of his recent call list.
Beckett: What? Where is it?
Castle: Don't...don't poke me.
Beckett: Poke you? I want to kiss you.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
Montgomery: [to Ryan and Esposito] Gentlemen. Where are we with Violet Young?
Esposito: Just got off the phone with her mother. She says she remembers Violet having a roommate who lives near Canal Street.
Ryan: Ya, we're gonna head over there and see if Violet reached out to her.
Montgomery: Well let me know. You heard from Beckett?
Esposito: No sir.
Ryan: Ya, me neither.
Montgomery: She's not answering her cell?
Esposito: Maybe she's airborne.
Ryan: Hmm, that would explain her phone being turned off.
Montgomery: You know, I'm trying to decide who is the worse liar...him [Esposito] or you [Ryan]. Go find Violet Young and help Beckett put this thing to bed, alright?

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
[Beckett is calling Mannis' cell phone, unaware that Ryan and Esposito have already encountered him]
Esposito: [over phone] Yo.
Beckett: Esposito?!
Esposito: Beckett?
Beckett: Are you with Mannis?
Esposito: Ya I just shot him. Why are you calling him?
Beckett: Look, we need to know where and when Gans is selling those bullets.
Esposito: Done. Where's the deal going down?
Mannis : I'm hit, man. Call an ambulance.
Esposito: Oh, my partner's on that.
Ryan: Nine. One. What-- what comes after that one?
Mannis : I'm in pain here, man!
Esposito: It's over, Mannis. You give us the meet location, I'll tell the D.A. in L.A. that you cooperated.
Mannis : Ah!!! Santa Monica pier! Six o'clock! Now call an ambulance!
Ryan: Who shot Royce?
Mannis: It was Ganz.
Esposito: You get that?
Beckett: Yeah, we got it. Thanks. Got to get to Santa Monica pier.
Castle: It's quarter after six now.
Beckett: This is gonna be our last chance to get Ganz.
LAPD Detective Kyle Sieger: Okay, let's roll.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
Ganz: You should have stayed out of this, Royce.
Royce: You have no idea the hell that's about to rain down on you.
Ganz: Scary. [Shoots Royce, killing him]

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
[After they are left alone in the hotel suite]
Beckett: I'd like to start the investigation.
Castle: We haven't even ordered room service yet.
Beckett: Castle, I'm not here for room service. I'm here for justice. [Walks past him and out the door.]
Castle: Wow. In L.A. for all of a minute and already she's sprouting cheesy movie dialogue. Must be something in the air.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
[After meeting with Gene Simmons]
Castle: This is so weird.
Beckett: What?
Castle: I've dressed up as him for Halloween.
Beckett: [scratching the back of her head] I did, too.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
[After Montgomery orders Beckett to return to New York]
Castle: Would Montgomery really fire you?
Beckett: Yeah.
Castle: So we're going back to New York.
Beckett: Hell no.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
Esposito: [via phone] What's up, girl? How's the weather in your world?
Beckett: Sunny, chance of ass-kicking.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
Castle: You know what I thought when I first met you?
Beckett: Hm?
Castle: That you were a mystery I was never going to solve. Even now, after spending all this time with you, I'm still amazed at the depth of your strength and your heart... and your hotness.
Beckett: You're not so bad yourself, Castle.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
[After shooting Ganz in the leg and cornering him under the beach walkway]
Ganz: I knew you were a cop.
Beckett: My name is Detective Kate Beckett, NYPD. Michael Royce was my friend. You shot him and left him in an alley like a piece of garbage. Consider this poetic justice.
Ganz: He said something about hell raining down on me. I never imagined hell looked like you.

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
[Beckett reading Royce's last words in his letter to her]'
Royce: "And now for the hard part, kid. It's clear that you and Castle have something real. And you're fighting it. But trust me, putting the job ahead of your heart is a mistake. Risking our hearts is why we're alive. The last thing you want is to look back on your life and wonder, 'if only'".
[Beckett glances over at a sleeping Castle]

  --  To Love and Die in L.A. [3.22]
%
Montgomery: It's my 30th anniversary
Beckett: Oh, sir, congratulations.
Castle: Thirty years of marriage and you don't know what to buy her?
Montgomery: If you stayed married long enough, you'd know it's hard to stay original after the first 10.
Castle: That's fair.

  --  Pretty Dead [3.23]
%
Castle: Still no luck on the gift?
Montgomery: I keep coming up empty.
Castle: The best thing to give a woman is something she said she wanted when she didn't think you were listening.
Montgomery: What if I wasn't listening?
Castle: Gift certificate?

  --  Pretty Dead [3.23]
%
Beckett: Bad boyfriends and pageant queens? This is like Debbie Winnekar all over again.
Castle: You having flashbacks?
Beckett: It was my own private Vietnam. Our place smelled of hairspray, perfume and cigarettes. I'm surprised that we didn't spontaneously combust.
Castle: I love the smell of hairspray in the morning. Smells like...victory.

  --  Pretty Dead [3.23]
%
[Speaking to Alexis about the possibility of a long-distance relationship with Ashley]
Castle: I think that nothing is certain. And that you could be ending something that might've worked if you'd just given it a little more time.
Alexis: What if I'm just cutting my losses on something that was never meant to be?
Castle: Then we can be the father-daughter version of Grey Gardens. Life is a journey. And there is no predicting the outcome. The only thing you can control are your choices. And they'll... They'll define who you are. I would just hate to see you so focused on the problem right in front of you that you completely miss the entire picture.

  --  Pretty Dead [3.23]
%
[After the killer, Justin, attempts to flee and crashes into a clothing rack]
Castle: A word of advice, Justin. When the lady says stop... Stop.
[Beckett smiles]

  --  Pretty Dead [3.23]
%
Beckett: Justin confessed to everything. His last three clients were losers. Amber was supposed to be his comeback and, if she didn't win, he was through. And, apparently, he found the same naked photos that we did and thought that her ex-boyfriend was trying to exploit her.
Castle: He was worried if they called the cops that her secret would get out and they'd both be ruined. So, he decided to handle it on his own. Unfortunately, Jeremy was drunk, he got violent, and Justin ended up killing him.
Beckett: And he staged it like it was a suicide. Once Amber found out, she threatened to turn him in and he killed her.
Montgomery: That's a whole pageant of bad choices. Good work you two.
[Ryan and Esposito clear their throats in the background.]
Montgomery: Uh, good work, you all.
Esposito: Thank you.
Castle: Mmm, I see a beauty queen worthy of a crown.
Evelyn: Always the charmer, Rick.
Montgomery: Hey, what you doing here? You know I was just coming to swoop you up.
Evelyn: Yeah, well, I know how you lose all sense of time when you're working. I figured I'd meet you here.
Montgomery: Mm-hmm.
Beckett: Do you guys have any big plans?
Evelyn: Dinner and dancing with the best husband in Manhattan. Especially since he gave me that gift this morning.
Castle: Oh, what did you end up giving her?
Montgomery: I followed your advice, Castle. I thought about some of the things Evelyn said she wanted the past couple of years. And my gift to her is next year I'm retiring from the force.
Evelyn: We're going to go traveling. We're going to go to all of the romantic places.
Ryan: Wait, you serious, Boss?
Esposito: You really want to retire?
Montgomery: I haven't accomplished everything I wanted to on the job, but I've done enough. It's time for me to move on.
Evelyn: Best gift ever. More Roy.
[The Montgomerys kiss.]
[After Montgomery tell the team he plans on retiring next year]
Montgomery: Mm-hmm. Look, I taught you guys everything I know about doing this job, alright? You're going to be fine without me And for crying out loud, lose the long faces. Smile please? That's an order.
[All laugh]
Montgomery: Hey, you kids take care, alright? You guys behave now.
Esposito: You have a good time.
Beckett: Congratulations you guys. Goodnight.
Montgomery: Thank you.
Evelyn: Bye.
Castle: Happy anniversary.
Montgomery: Goodnight.
Ryan: Goodnight, Captain. [Turns To Castle] What the hell did you say to him?
Castle: Nothing. No, I-- I just told him to listen to what his wife wanted.
Esposito: Damn, Castle.
Castle: How can you think-- I didn't-- There's no way--
Beckett: Castle, let me let you in on a little secret. Captain Montgomery retires all the time, just give it a week or two. He's like the Brett Favre of the NYPD. Trust me. He's not going anywhere.
Castle: Not going anywhere.

  --  Pretty Dead [3.23]
%
Castle: Ashley. What are you doing here?
Ashley: Hey, Mr. Castle.
Alexis: Hey, Dad, guess what?
Castle: [Smiling] What?
Alexis: I'm going to Stanford.
Castle: [Blinks in confusion] What?
Alexis: I'm applying for early admission. And since I've been taking extra classes each semester since my freshman year, I have enough credits to graduate in the fall.
Castle: [Sitting down, stunned] ...What?
Alexis: Yeah. This way, Ash and I will be together in January, in college!
Castle: [In greater confusion] What?
Ashley: That was actually her idea, sir.
Castle: [In disbelief] What?

  --  Pretty Dead [3.23]
%
Beckett: I don't know what you think you accomplished, but this doesn't change a thing. You hear me? Whoever hired you, he can't hide from me.
Lockwood: No, sweetheart. You've got it ass-backwards. You can't hide from him.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Beckett: So this third cop wasn't Lockwood's target. His third cop was the one who was holding Lockwood's leash. He's the one who's behind this whole thing. Okay, I want us to pull reports with Raglan and McCallister's name on it.
Ryan: We did all that already.
Esposito: Months ago. There's nothing.
Beckett: No, no, no. I'm not talking about arrest reports. I'm talking about performance evaluations...
Esposito: We went through everything. We looked at every cop we could find who could have worked with them. None of them were our third guy.
Beckett: Well, then check it again. And when you're done with that, check it again.
Ryan: Beckett, we want him as bad as you.
Beckett: The hell you do! Nobody wants him as bad as I do, okay? Nobody. So check it again!

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Montgomery: Castle, did Beckett ever tell you how we met?
Castle: No.
Montgomery: I was working late one night, went down to archives to locate some old reports, and there she was with a flashlight and a bankers box open on her lap, studying this unsolved. She was a patrol cop then, she wasn't even authorized to be down there. When I asked her what the hell she was doing, she told me this was her mother's case. And she'd found some things that didn't add up. Now, I could've written her up right then.
Castle: Why didn't you?
Montgomery: Because I knew it wouldn't stop her. It was there in her eyes, man. And I thought, "With this kid's tenacity and some training, I mean, she'd make a hell of a Homicide."
Castle: That tenacity's gonna get her killed.
Montgomery: I cannot make Beckett stand down, Castle. I never could. And the way I figure, the only one who can is you.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Beckett: Castle, if you've got something to say, just please say it.
Castle: Beckett, everyone associated with this case is dead. Everyone. First your mom and her colleagues, then Raglan, then McCallister. You know they're coming for you next.
Beckett: Captain Montgomery's got a protective detail on me. Wasn't that hard to spot.
Castle: That's not going to be enough to stop Lockwood, you know that. Think about what they're up against. Professional killers? I've been working with you for three years, you know me. I'm the guy who says we can move that rubber tree plant, but you know what, Beckett? I don't think we're gonna win this.
Beckett: Castle, they killed my mother. What do you want me to do here?
Castle: Walk away. They're going to kill you, Kate. If you don't care about that, at least think about how that's going to affect the people that love you. You really want to put your dad through that? And what about Josh?
Beckett: And what about you, Rick?
Castle: Well, of course I don't want anything to happen to you. I'm your partner. I'm your friend.
Beckett: Is that what we are?
Castle: All right, you know what? I don't know what we are. We kiss, and then we never talk about it. We nearly die frozen in each other's arms, but we never talk about it. So, no, I got no clue what we are. I know I don't want to see you throw your life away.
Beckett: Yeah, well, last time I checked, it was my life, not your personal jungle gym. And for the past three years, I have been running around with the school's funniest kid. And it's not enough.
Castle: You know what? This isn't about your mother's case anymore. This is about you needing a place to hide Because you've been chasing this thing so long, you're afraid to find out who you are without it.
Beckett: You don't know me, Castle. You think you do, but you don't.
Castle: I know you crawled inside your mother's murder and didn't come out. I know you hide there. The same way you hide in these nowhere relationships with men you don't love. You could be happy, Kate. You deserve to be happy. But you're afraid.
Beckett: You know what we are, Castle? We are over. Now get out.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Montgomery: We speak for the dead. That's the job. We are all they've got once the wicked rob them of their voices. We owe them that. But we don't owe them our lives.
Beckett: He said that we can't win this.
Montgomery: He's right. I've spent most of my life walking behind this badge, and I can tell you this for a fact. There are no victories. There's only the battle. And the best that you could hope for is that you find some place where you can make your stand. If this is your spot, I will stand with you.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Lockwood: [To Montgomery] Look at it this way, if you and Raglan and McCallister hadn't sinned so spectacularly, then God wouldn't have sent a punishment like me.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Montgomery: This is my spot, Kate. This is where I stand.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
[After Beckett is shot]
Castle: Kate... I love you. I love you, Kate.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Martha: Richard, this isn't one of your books, you don't know the ending! You were just lucky yesterday.
Castle: You're overreacting, mother. Where is this coming from?
Martha: How the hell can you ask me something like that? Think about how much you love Alexis, and that is how much I love you, and don't you dare ask me where this is coming from!  You have gotten through most of life on your wit, and charm and no small amount of talent. But that is the real world out there, and you can't charm your way out of a bullet.
Castle: You think I should quit?
Martha: I think you should be honest with yourself about why you're doing this. You had written 22 novels before you met her, and you didn't need to spend every day in a police station in order to finish them.
Castle: It's not about the books anymore.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Simmons: You painted since the last time I was here. You'd have been about 16 wrestling some pimply kid in the back of his daddy's wagon. Wondering if you were gonna give it to him or not.
Castle: Hey that's enough!
Simmons: He's sweet on you. Makes him brave.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Beckett: Castle, there's something I need you to do
Castle: Name it.
Beckett: Go home.
Castle: Forget it. Fear does not exist in this dojo.
Beckett: Look, I signed up for this when I put that badge on, you didn't. It's not your fight.
Castle: [Suddenly incensed] The hell it isn't! [Calmer, but completely serious] I don't hang around you just to annoy you, I don't ride off to murder scenes in the middle of the night just to satisfy some morbid curiosity. If that was all this was I would've quit a long time ago.
Beckett]: Well, then, why do you keep coming back, Rick?
Castle: Look, I may not have a badge-unless you count the chocolate one Alexis gave me for my birthday-but I'll tell you this: like it or not, I'm your plucky sidekick.
Beckett: Plucky sidekick always gets killed.
Castle: Partner, then.
Beckett: Okay.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
Beckett: There was, uh, a lawyer named Johanna Beckett, Are you familiar with her? She was murdered in the alley about seven years into your incarceration.
Pulgatti: You look just like her, you know. When you first walked in here, it was like I was looking at a ghost. The way she talked about you, I should've known you'd become a cop. I sent letters to every lawyer I could find, and your mother was the only one who wrote me back, the only one willing to take a chance on me. She didn't care that I was a thug.
Beckett: All she cared about was the truth.

  --  Knockout [3.24]
%
[Beckett's boyfriend Josh blames Castle for her getting shot]
Castle: He's right, you know. This is my fault.
Martha: Richard Castle, don't you dare blame yourself. You did not shoot her.
Castle: No, but I put her in the crosshairs.

  --  Rise [4.1]
%
Alexis: You act like this is all about her. But you were standing right next to her; you could have been shot. Hell, I could have been shot! You need to grow up, dad. You're a writer, not a cop. Stop pretending.

  --  Rise [4.1]
%
Beckett: After my mother was killed, something inside me changed. It's like I built up this wall inside. I don't know, I guess I just didn't wanna hurt like that again. I know I'm not going be able to be the kind of person that I want to be, I know I'm not gonna ... I'm not gonna be able to have the kind of relationship that I want, until that wall comes down. And it's not gonna happen 'till I put this thing to rest.
Castle: Well, then I suppose we're just gonna have to find these guys and take them down.

  --  Rise [4.1]
%
Castle: Mother, prepare to feast on the finest omelet in the land... (He looks up and sees what Martha is wearing.) Before you join the convent...
Martha: No, I am making costumes for my Shakespeare class. So, what do you think?
Castle: I seem to remember asking you to make me an ET Halloween costume, and you told me you didn't know how to sew.
Martha: Details. Besides, you were 32 at the time.

  --  Heroes and Villains [4.2]
%
Castle: Whoa. You smell that? Wafting scent of printed pages. Comicadia. Beckett, this place is the premier comic book shop. It's the Vatican to a Catholic. It's Mecca to a pilgrim. Upstream to a...
Beckett: I know, Castle! I bought my first comic here when I was 14. Sin City. Dame to Kill For.
Castle: Hard core! Okay, whoa, okay. If you could be any comic book character in the world, who would you be?
Beckett: Elektra.
Castle: Oh. A ruthless assassin who hides from her emotions.
Beckett: No, maybe it's because she's got badass ninja skills.
Castle: Oh.
Beckett: What about you? Iron Man, Spider-Man? No wait, I know, Annoying Man.
Castle: Try billionaire industrialist Bruce Wayne, aka, the Dark Knight. He's brooding, he'd handsome, and he has all the coolest toys.
Beckett: Wow, digging deep on that one.

  --  Heroes and Villains [4.2]
%
Mike: We just got your Derrick Storm graphic novel, I mean, the art, the writing, it is, in a word, awesome!
Castle: Tell me, what's your favorite part?
Kate: You don't have to answer that question. His ego does not need anymore feeding.
Mike: Definitely where Derrick Storm escapes from the two bad guys by crashing the taxi cab.
Castle: Taxi cab!
Mike: Oh, I'm sorry, Detective Beckett, I should've said spoiler alert.
Kate: Oh, no, that's okay, I won't be reading it.
Mike: Really? I saw your name on our list. You preordered a copy.
Castle: Did she now?
Kate: I was just being supportive.

  --  Heroes and Villains [4.2]
%
Ryan: Haven't you ever wanted to be a superhero? Going out there, prowling the city, knocking some heads.
Esposito: I do that now.

  --  Heroes and Villains [4.2]
%
Castle: Paul is the writer, Lone Vengeance is the subject. That's their relationship. It's you and me all over again, but I'm Paul and you're Lone Vengeance.
Beckett: Really, Castle? Is that how you see me? Like a sword-wielding killer?
Castle: Depends. Will you be scantily clad?
Beckett: In your dreams.

  --  Heroes and Villains [4.2]
%
Castle: She grew up so fast.
Martha: Well, what do you expect? Her to live here forever?
Castle: Well, her, yes. You...
Martha: Watch it.

  --  Head Case [4.3]
%
Alexis: How do you do it, Dad?
Castle: Do what?
Alexis: Well, that letter that you have framed in your office.
Castle: [fondly] My first manuscript rejection.
Alexis: Yeah. How can you stand having it there?
Castle: Because it drives me. And I got twenty more of those before Black Pawn ever agreed to publish In a Hail of Bullets. That letter... that letter reminds me of what I've overcome. Rejection isn't failure.
Alexis: It sure feels like failure.
Castle: No, failure is giving up. Everybody gets rejected. It's how you handle it that determines where you'll end up.
Alexis: My whole life has been about making sure I could get into any college I wanted. What's it about now?
Castle: Give it time. You'll figure it out.

  --  Head Case [4.3]
%
Esposito: Yo, Ryan, 'sup man, where you been?
Ryan: Down at the college running down that break-in in Hamilton's office. So listen to this- (looks down at the desk) What the hell is this?
Esposito: That, my friend, is Beau Randolph's alibi.
Ryan: A dead pigeon?
Esposito: CSU found it on the roof of his building with a slug on his belly from his .45.
Ryan: Seriously? Randolph really did commit murder, huh?
Esposito: Just writing him up for animal cruelty right now.
Ryan: Maybe there's still time to cryogenically freeze the little guy...

  --  Head Case [4.3]
%
Gates: What about the victim? Any closer to an ID?
Beckett: Based on blood, Dr. Parish determined that our victim is a male, so we're looking for missing persons reports of men in that area.
Gates: Men? You've narrowed the victim pool down to men?
[Beckett tries to respond, but can't]
Castle: Uh, well, in New York City, that actually eliminates over four million women, so...
[Gates glares stonily at him]
Gates: Mr. Castle, I don't know what the mayor sees in you, but I know how you're alike. He's term-limited. [walks away]
Castle: Maybe if I sent her flowers-
Beckett: No. No.

  --  Head Case [4.3]
%
Castle: Where do you start when you don't know who the victim is?
Beckett: You... [frowns] Ah, you know you could... [stops trying and sighs]
Castle: We really need to find the body, don't we?
Beckett: Yeah, pretty much.

  --  Head Case [4.3]
%
Castle: You know, Ryan, none of this is your fault. The fact that he used your gun...
Ryan: That weapon was issued to me by the city of New York. I let it out of my hand, and now a girl is dead. So please do not tell me that it's not my fault.

  --  Kick the Ballistics [4.4]
%
Ryan: When I started in Narcotics, I was so green. I-I didn't know how things worked. One day, there's this major bust, street gang cooking meth. They're stacking up guys in the bullpen, taking their statements one by one. Place is a zoo. I'm answering phones in the squad. Girl on the line, name of Alisha, asking for my lieutenant. So I call out across the bullpen, Hey Lou, Alisha's on the phone for you. It was her tip that got these guys nailed, and all of them just heard me call out her name. Searched all day and all night, looking for her before the gang could get word back to the street that she was a narc.
Beckett: Well, did you find her?
Ryan: I did. Got her into witness protection, but that was the stupidest thing I'd ever done as a cop. Until the day Jerry Tyson got the drop on me and stole my weapon.

  --  Kick the Ballistics [4.4]
%
Beckett: (While watching Castle making coffee.) Well, I, uh, I think we all ended up with what we wanted.
Serena: Yeah?
Beckett: Um, you know, after you and Castle went on that date...
Serena: More like a sting.
Beckett: He never thought that you were involved. He believed in you, even when I didn't.
Serena: Why are you telling me this?
Beckett: I just... I think that you should know what kind of person you're dealing with.
Castle: Here we are, ladies. (He hands them both a cup of coffee.)
Beckett: Thank you.
Serena: Thank you.
Castle: Anything wrong?
Beckett: Uh, no. I should, um, just gonna go and file some stuff. (She leaves.)
Serena: (Handing the coffee back.) And I'm going back to my hotel. I would ask you to come, but, it's like I said. I don't steal things that belong to someone else. (She leaves.)
Beckett: (Popping back around the corner.) You guys didn't go out?
Castle: No.
Beckett: Why?
Castle: Because I can't afford it. Museum just slapped me with a bill for the exhibit I broke. (He shows her the bill.)
Beckett: Whoa!
Castle: I know! Think they'd cut me some slack after the whole 'helping to solve the murder' thing.
Beckett: I guess the least the NYPD can do is take you out for a hamburger.
Castle: I accept.
Beckett: Let's go.
Castle: I could put Alexis through college on this.
Beckett: Yeah, and med school.
Castle: Thank God I'm rich.

  --  Eye of the Beholder [4.5]
%
Beckett: I'm sure there's a perfect explanation for all of that.
Castle: There is. They're heeeeerrrrre!

  --  Demons [4.6]
%
Beckett: Alright Castle, I appreciate your work, I do, but, what does it have to do with our case?
Castle: Just getting to that. It seems that in almost all of these killings, the killer claimed there was a - ready for this? - that a demon was responsible.
Beckett: (In a sarcastic tone) A demon? Really?
Castle: I'm not making this up! It's in the books!
Beckett: Fine! A demon killed Jack Sinclair. So what's our next move? Are we gonna stake out the house, wait for the demon to show up and zap him with our proton pack?

  --  Demons [4.6]
%
Castle: Listen, if you're not scared, just say it.
Beckett: No!
Castle: Come on, I know you want it.
Beckett: I don't wanna say it, Castle...
Castle: For me, please...
Beckett: I ain't afraid of no ghosts... (Ghostbusters theme playing)

  --  Demons [4.6]
%
Castle: So, if Barry's not our guy, I think it's time we revisit the possibility that our killer's-
Beckett: If you say "ghost," I'm sending you home.
Castle: [Looks over at Esposito in consideration and then back to Beckett] Apparition American.

  --  Demons [4.6]
%
Castle: I can tell you this: Any relationship that lasts longer than a breath mint is gonna have challenges, but if a relationship doesn't work out, it's usually not because of the challenges, it's usually because the relationship wasn't strong enough to begin with. Does this help?
Alexis: Not really. (Snuggles close to Castle) But this always does.
Castle: I promise you this: if two people believe in something, really believe, anything even the impossible, is possible.

  --  Demons [4.6]
%
[Beckett's on the precinct, her phone rings]
Beckett: What do you want Castle?
Castle: Tell me you need me.
Beckett: (A moment of silence) Excuse me?
Castle: I'm stuck in the bank, helping my mother get a loan with my banker. Please tell me there's a murder somewhere we can be solving.
Beckett: Uh, sorry, there's no dead bodies, just a lot of paperwork, but you're welcome to come and do your share, for once.
Castle: The only thing worse than being here is being there doing paperwork. [looks around the bank] I think this bank is about to get robbed.
Beckett: What?
Castle: Two people just came in wearing doctor's scrubs, both with suspicious bulges in their jackets.
Beckett: I think it's just your writer's imagination getting the best of you.
[a third person in scrubs walks in and jams the front door with a U-lock, all 3 "doctors" pull out guns]
Robber: Everybody down now! Everybody on the floor, right now! [Beckett's eyes widen in surprise as she hears this over the phone]
Castle: It's not my imagination! It's not my imagination!

  --  Cops & Robbers [4.7]
%
[Talking to the fourth gunman over the phone as the bank is being robbed]
Beckett: Listen to me. So far, nobody has been hurt and nothing has been stolen. So if you just leave the same way that you came in, you can just disappear.
Robber: You gonna promise not to come look for me?
Beckett: I don't look. I hunt. And trust me, you don't want that.

  --  Cops & Robbers [4.7]
%
Esposito: I don't get it. This is a little, old, retired librarian. What could possibly be in her safe-deposit box that would be worth doing all this?
Ryan: Nazi gold, cold fusion, map to Atlantis.
Esposito: Hey, Castle Jr., could you maybe start thinking like a cop, please?

  --  Cops & Robbers [4.7]
%
Castle: Even as a hostage, I help you solve murders. Beckett, I think... I think you have the perfect partner.
Beckett: [chuckles] Yeah, except he doesn't like doing paperwork.
Castle: Touche.

  --  Cops & Robbers [4.7]
%
[Beckett talking to the robbers]
Beckett: Listen to me, jackass. I do not control traffic, so you're gonna have to give me 20 minutes.
Robber: Now you got one minute, Kate.
Beckett: No. I've got 20. Do you hear me? 20. Because if you pull that trigger, I will walk through those doors and personally put a bullet through your skull.
Robber: Okay, Kate. You got 20 more minutes.
Cop: Well, that's one way to negotiate.

  --  Cops & Robbers [4.7]
%
Castle: The last time I saw you in your PJs after eight am, I think you were four.
Alexis: We're off today. Teacher's retreat. I didn't feel like getting dressed.
Castle: This wouldn't have anything to do with Ashley, would it?
Alexis: Did I do the right thing, breaking up with him?
Castle: Oh, sweetie, I don't know. That's something only you can answer.
Alexis: It sucks. I miss him a lot.
Castle: Yeah, well you're not doing yourself any favors sitting around reading Pride and Prejudice. That's just gonna make it worse. Might as well be listening to Adele.
Alexis: Hey, she totally gets it. And so does Jane Austen.

  --  Heartbreak Hotel [4.8]
%
Castle: Do you keep former guests in the system?
Sullivan: That's how we flag gamblers with priors.
Castle: What about me?
Sullivan: Let's see. Richard Castle. Resident New York City. Disorderly conduct, resisting arrest in 2003. And, uh, wow. Apparently last time you were at the Sapphire, you accidentally set a mattress on fire and the drapes were covered in jam.
Castle: (Laughing.) That was a good fun night.

  --  Heartbreak Hotel [4.8]
%
Castle: Well, how about just a low-key evening with your girlfriends? You guys can have a John Hughes marathon and fill out a Cosmo quiz.
Alexis: Dad, the '80s just called. It wants its plan back.

  --  Heartbreak Hotel [4.8]
%
Castle: You know, the man owned a casino. A guy like that, you'd think he'd have a driver.
Esposito: Especially since he was expecting trouble. He came heavy. [Holds up a bagged gun] It's a .357 Magnum with all six still asleep in the cylinder.
Ryan: He didn't even pull it out of the glove box. If he did, we'd be standing over the other guy.
Castle: Yeah well, you got to know when to hold them. And, when to fold them.
Esposito: Know when to walk away. Know when the run.
Lanie: [giving Esposito an irritated glance] Detective Esposito, a little respect, please. I mean, there is a dead body here.
Esposito: What'd I do?
[Lanie rises up and walks away]
Castle: You broke up with her.
Esposito: We broke up with each other. That's different.
Castle: Yeah, you would think it would be different. But, no.

  --  Heartbreak Hotel [4.8]
%
Esposito: Did you see that? He [Ryan] just sidestepped me. What's that about?
Castle: It's almost as though the thought of marriage fills him with an impending sense of doom. [Laughs] No, no, wait, that's me.

  --  Heartbreak Hotel [4.8]
%
[After Castle catches the elevator]
Esposito: What are you doing?
Castle: What's it look like? Do you think I was going to pass up a road trip to the Boardwalk Empire, the East Coast epicenter of dancing, gambling, showgirls and sin?
Ryan: You do realize we're going there to investigate a murder, don't you?
Castle: [putting his arms around their shoulders] Gentlemen, if I've learned one thing, it's to not let a little thing like murder get in the way of having a good time. And also, shotgun.

  --  Heartbreak Hotel [4.8]
%
Beckett: Hey.
Castle: Hey.
Beckett: What are you doing?
Castle: Just waiting for my partner. Maybe you've seen her. Pretty girl, thinks she can leap tall buildings in a single bound, carries the weight of the world on her shoulders, yet, still manages to laugh at some of my jokes.
Beckett: She sounds like a handful.
Castle: Tell me about it. Anyway, if you do see her, tell her she owes me about a hundred coffees.
Beckett: Castle? Thank you.
Castle: For what?
Beckett: For not pushing, and giving me the space to get through this.
Castle: Always.

  --  Kill Shot [4.9]
%
Beckett: [Heading to the evidence room] Espo, what are we doing back here?
Esposito: I want to show you something. [Pulls out a rifle]
Beckett: What is that?
Esposito: The rifle that shot you.
Beckett: You are way out of line.
Esposito: Just look at it.
Beckett: [Backs away] What the hell are you doing?
Esposito: I've been where you are, I know what you're going through.
Beckett: Javi, I'm fine.
Esposito: You're not fine. You're just trying to act like you are. [Holds up the rifle] This is just a tool. It's a hunk of steel. It has no magical powers, and the person that fired it is not some all-powerful God. Just a guy with a gun. Just like the guy we've hunting now. And like every other bad guy, he's damaged goods.
Beckett: [After a moment of silence] So am I.
Esposito: That's right. And that's okay. You think it's a weakness? Make it a strength. It's a part of you. [Hands the rifle out to her] So use it.

  --  Kill Shot [4.9]
%
Lanie: I told you, it's none of your business.
Castle: Of course it's none of my business, that's why I want to know.
Beckett: Know what?
Castle: What she and Esposito were fighting about.
Beckett: That's none of your business.
Castle: That's the point.

  --  Cuffed [4.10]
%
Castle: Do you know what Lanie and Esposito were fighting about?
Beckett: Everything. They both want to be together but neither of them wants to admit to it.
Castle: Ugh, why do people do that to themselves?
Beckett: Maybe they just don't see it.
Castle: How could they not? It's so obvious.

  --  Cuffed [4.10]
%
Castle: I've always liked your legs. But now I respect them.
Beckett: Yeah, yours aren't so bad either. You know, for the next police picnic, we should do the three-legged race together.
Castle: You're on.

  --  Cuffed [4.10]
%
Castle: What's gonna happen with that tiger anyway?
Esposito: Shoot it.
Beckett: She'll get transferred to a sanctuary.
Esposito: Or that.
Beckett: Probably end up in a zoo. Why, you wanna go visit her?
Castle: No. No thanks, I'm good.
Beckett: Alright, you guys get some rest.
Esposito: You too.
Beckett: That has gotta be the strangest brush with death I've ever had.
Castle: Me too. But I'll tell ya, after that experience, if I ever have to be hitched to someone, it would be you.
Beckett: Hitched?
Castle: Hitched? No, I didn't say hitched. I said cuffed. Handcuffed, not hitched. (He helps her into her jacket.) The colloquial or any other connotation or meaning.
Beckett: It's okay, Castle, I understood what you meant, and for what it's worth, if I ever have to spend another night handcuffed to someone again, I wouldn't mind if it was you either.
Castle: Really?
Beckett: But next time, let's do it without the tiger. (She walks past him.)
Castle: Next time?
(Beckett glances back, and then keeps walking. Castle grins.)

  --  Cuffed [4.10]
%
Beckett: What is so special about our victim that our killer burned off his fingerprints?
[Castle starts to speak]
Beckett: Don't say spy.
[pause; Castle starts to speak again]
Beckett: Or Mob hit.
Castle: Mob hit of a spy?

  --  Cuffed [4.10]
%
Castle: Still too high.
Beckett: Not if I climb on your shoulders. [When Castle gives her a look] What? We've done it before.
Castle: Yeah, you say that like it was pleasant. And we weren't handcuffed.
Beckett: Who's got no faith now? Come on Castle, we have no idea when they're coming back or even if they're coming back at all.
Castle: [Looks down at her heeled shoes] Last time you were wearing sneakers.
Beckett: Fine. [Tries to pry them off, but can't] Think I'm gonna need your help.
Castle: [muttering as he works to pull them off] "Lift up my shirt." "Pull off my boots." Under normal circumstances, I would like where this was heading.
Beckett: You can fantasize later after we get out of the room.
Castle: Just so you know, not as much fun if I have your permission. How do you run in these things?
Beckett: Shut up and pull.

  --  Cuffed [4.10]
%
[As they are trying to escape the tiger]
Beckett: She's playing with us. She's gonna knock it over. What are we gonna do?
Castle: There's only one thing to do. Scream like little girls
Castle & Beckett: Help! Help!
Esposito: Beckett! Castle!
Beckett: Esposito!
Esposito: Is that a tiger?
Castle: Yeah, yeah, that's a tiger! Hey, how about getting us out?

  --  Cuffed [4.10]
%
Castle: Let me ask you two something. If you found out a man was cheating on you, how would you kill him?
Martha: Knife. To the heart.
Castle: All right, what if you don't have the stomach for that?
Alexis: Shoot him.
Castle: You don't have the stomach for that, either.
Martha: What's wrong with our stomachs?
Alexis: There's always poison.
Martha: True. Watch him writhe. And suffer.
Alexis: Die like the rodent he is.
Castle: Wow. All these years writing about murderers, I had no idea I was living among them.

  --  Til Death Do Us Part [4.11]
%
Martha: Darling. Beauty does not happen by accident.
Alexis: That's why when it goes unappreciated by cheating scum, (she holds out her butter knife) we want revenge.

  --  Til Death Do Us Part [4.11]
%
Castle: Even their hypothetical fury is unnerving. William Congreve had it right when he talked about scorned women.
Beckett: Yeah well, you haven't heard what I would do.
Castle: Yeah, I don't think I ever want to know.

  --  Til Death Do Us Part [4.11]
%
Pablo: You know, you have some beautiful eyes.
Beckett: Seriously?
Pablo: What? It's a numbers game. I strike out 90% of the time.
Beckett: Thus restoring my faith in my gender.

  --  Til Death Do Us Part [4.11]
%
Esposito: I don't know what this dude Bailey was into, but whatever it was he had it going on.
Ryan: Really? This impresses you? These women are pathetic for falling for this guy and Bailey? Bailey was just a con man, and a liar.
Beckett: Thank you. At least there is one real man amongst us. Ryan, why don't you take The Situation down to The Magic Bottle and see if we can get an ID on Lisa.

  --  Til Death Do Us Part [4.11]
%
Beckett: (looking at book of victim's conquests) Oh my God. That's Jenny.
Castle: Not just Jenny. (points at page) "Gyrating Jenny".

  --  Til Death Do Us Part [4.11]
%
Castle: So. What are we gonna do?
Beckett: About what?
Castle: Well we have to tell Ryan about Jenny.
Beckett: What? Why? Castle, if we were getting married would you want to know about all the guys that I've slept with?
Castle: All?
Beckett: Seriously? You sign women's chests at book readings. You cannot be shocked that I'm not a virgin.
Castle: I - it's just the word -all- suggests a lot. How many are we talking ... exactly?
Beckett: Are you really asking for my number?
Castle: You show me yours, I'll show you mine.
Beckett: (amused) Men. You all wanna know, but you don't wanna know. Listen, every woman has her secrets, including Jenny. And sometimes, for the sake of a relationship, it is better not to share.

  --  Til Death Do Us Part [4.11]
%
Castle: Officer and a gentleman. That could be the name of our crime blog.
Beckett: Crime blog? The way that you help me write police reports? Got a feeling I'll be writing that one on my own.

  --  Dial M For Mayor [4.12]
%
Beckett: If his staff wants to minimize damage, they'll step back and let me do my job.
Castle: Step back? These are politicians. They can't order at a restaurant without two compromises and an ultimatum.

  --  Dial M For Mayor [4.12]
%
Mr. Smith: You're a writer, finish this sentence. "If Weldon had been run out of office..."
Rick Castle: I'd be gone from the Twelfth Precinct.
Mr. Smith: And then who'd keep Beckett from looking into things she shouldn't? Who'd keep her out of harm's way?
Rick Castle: So you did this to protect her? Why?
Mr. Smith: You play chess, Mr. Castle? Sometimes a well-placed pawn is more powerful than a king.

  --  Dial M For Mayor [4.12]
%
Beckett: [learning their victim didn't own a cell phone] What girl in her twenties doesn't have a cell phone?

  --  Dial M for Mayor [4.12]
%
Castle: Buttons? You have a friend named Buttons? A human friend.
Alexis: Her mom called her that when she was little and it stuck.
Castle: Now, so is she.
Alexis: Buttons and I bonded over being rejected from Stanford. In fact, we applied to a lot of the same schools, so we were planning to visit a few campuses together this weekend. Make a road trip out of it.
Castle: Whoa. Okay, whoa. Where are you staying, who's driving, and who's chaperoning?
Alexis: We were going to take your Ferrari and hook up with some boys we met on Craigslist.
Castle: Not cool.

  --  An Embarrassment of Bitches [4.13]
%
Castle: Her last name is Dutton? (Alexis nods.) Your friend's name is Buttons Dutton?
Martha: That is unfortunate.
Alexis: What's so wrong with that?
Castle: Come on, it'd be like calling me Rassle, or Tassle, or (answering his phone) No Hassle Castle. Hey... No I was just making up one... Please don't call me that.

  --  An Embarrassment of Bitches [4.13]
%
(A group of paparazzi surround Castle.)
Photographer: Hey, that's not Jason Bateman.
Castle: That's getting old.

  --  An Embarrassment of Bitches [4.13]
%
Castle: We could keep him here at the precinct. I mean, we could use a mascot.
Esposito: I thought that's what you were.
Castle: That... what's that? What's that buddy? Esposito's sense of humor fell down a well and can't get out?

  --  An Embarrassment of Bitches [4.13]
%
Castle: You think she's wearing a wire?
Esposito: Dude, look at that outfit. Where's she gonna put a wire?
Castle: Well, if I had to be creative, I'd guess... (noticing Kate's look.) That's rhetorical.

  --  An Embarrassment of Bitches [4.13]
%
Castle: ...But it made me think, all those times when you were little, how you begged me for a dog, and I refused because-
Alexis: You said you'd be the one who'd wind up having to feed it. And it was hard enough remembering to feed me every day.
Castle: Yeah... [Blinks in confusion] I don't remember that last part.
Alexis: It was subtext. [Castle gives her a look] Barely.
Castle: Anyway, I want to make it up to you. I want to get you a dog. Only question is, what kind of dog do we get? What are we gonna name it? Whose room is it gonna sleep in?
Alexis: Whoa, Dad, slow down. I'm leaving for college soon, remember? You can't have a dog in your dorm room.
Castle: Right. I know, I'll just take care of him here, you can come visit him whenever you can.
Alexis: So...this dog you want to get, you know, for me? This wouldn't be an enticement to come home from college more often, would it?
Castle: Don't pretend like you're smarter than me. I taught you subtext, young lady.
Alexis: Don't worry. I'll come back and visit so much you'll be sick of me.
Castle: Promise?
Alexis: Yeah. Someone has to leave food out for you once in a while.
Castle: Speaking of, I'm kind of hungry right now.
Alexis: Kibbles 'n Bits?
Castle: Peanut butter on a spoon?
Alexis: [Laughs] Chinese.
Castle: I'd like a sandwich. Welcome home.
Alexis: Yeah.

  --  An Embarrassment of Bitches [4.13]
%
Castle:(After he reads about Joe and Vera's first meeting) The Blue Butterfly! It's a necklace! That's why Stan was killed? Why am I narrating?

  --  The Blue Butterfly [4.14]
%
Castle: And it happened backstage, right upstairs. They were stealing a moment together, which was dangerous, because she was Dempsey's girl. As they stared into each other's eyes, Kate's heart quickened...
Beckett: Did you just say Kate? Are you picturing the PI as you and me as the gangster's moll?
Castle: What? No. and I didn't say Kate, I said fate. Fate's heart quickened. I was being poetic.

  --  The Blue Butterfly [4.14]
%
[After reading the statement]
Ryan: But if Sally wasn't Vera's sister, then who was she?
Castle: Sally set up the PI. It's a classic film noir twist.
Ryan: But why?
Castle: [Gleefully] I don't know.
Ryan: What was Sally up to?
Castle: I don't know
Ryan: Do you think she was connected to Dempsey?
Castle: I don't know. Isn't this great?

  --  The Blue Butterfly [4.14]
%
Castle: It's 9 o'clock. What kind of passion is she finding at this time of night?
Martha: Um... (Rick's phone rings, it's Kate.) Aha! There, your better half.
Castle: Don't change the subject!

  --  Pandora [4.15]
%
Castle: And if I did tell you, well then I'd have to kill you.
Esposito: Yeah? Good luck with that.
Castle: Yeah, realistically that's not...

  --  Pandora [4.15]
%
Lanie: No ID, but lots of causes of death.
Castle: You mean other than gravity.
Lanie: Oh, yeah. See that bullet wound?
Beckett: So he was shot before he fell?
Lanie: And stabbed.
Beckett: Shot and stabbed?
Lanie: And choked and has a pencil jammed in the side of his neck.
Castle: Gives new meaning to the term "overkill."

  --  Pandora [4.15]
%
[As Lanie and Alexis arrive to the crime scene]
Alexis: Just so you know, I'm not letting this victim out of my sight.
Lanie: Crazy.
Alexis: What is?
Lanie: The fact that Richard Castle, a man unburdened by regret and guilt, has a child that carries the weight of the world.

  --  Pandora [4.15]
%
Castle: How could they get a court order that fast?
Beckett: I don't know. Maybe you should ask your girlfriend.
Lanie: Girlfriend?
Castle: Yes. Okay? We slept together. It was a long time ago. What's the big deal?
Beckett: There is no 'big deal', sleep with whoever you want. The more the merrier!
Alexis: (Clearing her throat.) I have those, uh, toxicology reports you wanted.
Lanie: Oh, yes, just set them there, sweetie. Thank you.

  --  Linchpin [4.16]
%
Castle: (To Alexis, as they return from the precinct) So, how was your day at precinct?
Alexis: Great. And here I thought the dead bodies were going to be the grossest part.

  --  Linchpin [4.16]
%
Castle: First Alexis is interning for Lanie, now my mother is taking over my office. I feel like my whole life is being invaded.
Beckett: You'll get used to it. I did.
Castle: It is not the same thing. It's similar, just much less invasive.

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Castle: (To Beckett) A girl wearing a red outfit in the middle of the woods, claw marks on her face. Am I the only one who is seeing this? (Beckett is puzzled) She is Little Red Riding Hood.
Beckett: (Sarcastically) Great, I'll call an APB on the Big Bad Wolf.
Castle: You have a better theory? (Ryan suddenly calls Beckett from far)
Beckett: Ryan, I want you to see if any animal here can cause these marks.
Ryan: Like a wolf? A Big Bad one?
Beckett: Really?

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Castle: There's this whole adult role playing subculture obsessed with fairy tales. (Kate looks at him.) Not that kind of adult role playing, although, there is that one too.
Beckett: And you know this how?
Castle: Did a little research. Hmm. Bo Peep. Anyway, these people get dressed in the outfits, they play the characters, they even re-enact the stories. Maybe that's what Amy was doing when everything went horribly and tragically wrong.
Beckett: Castle, that is a surprisingly reasonable and grounded theory.
Castle: Yeah. In fact, I am a little disappointed in myself.
Esposito: We all are, bro.

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Castle: (Reading from Martha's play.) 'Richard always had a dark imagination. He was destined either to become a serial killer or a mystery writer.' Mother, really?
Martha: Oh, it's just a slight exaggeration.
Castle: And according to this you're responsible for launching my writing career by... you slept with my first publisher?
Marcus: Mr Castle, I'm sure your talent would've gotten you there eventually.
Castle: My talent did get me there. I didn't get published because of her.
Martha: Technically, I slept with him after your book was out. This is just to be more salacious.
Castle: Wasn't he practically my age?
Martha: Honey, you know I've always loved younger men. They have so much energy, enough to keep up with me. Most of the time.
Castle: I'm gonna erase that image from my mind with a bottle of scotch. (He pours some scotch into a glass.)
Martha: Oh, darling, I invited Beckett to the reading tomorrow night, so you two might wanna make a date of it.
(Castle pours some more scotch into his glass.)

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Beckett: What was I supposed to do? Say no?
Castle: Yes.
Beckett: Why are you so against your mom's play?
Castle: Because she's rewriting history. My history. Trust me, I lived through it. She's making it sound like it's her own personal fairy tale.
Beckett: Oh, so you don't like it when someone writes their own version of your life. Interesting.
Castle: Okay, are you referring to the Nikki Heat books? Because this is completely different.
Beckett: How is it different?
Castle: Well, for one thing, I'm not claiming that what I write is actually true.
Beckett: Well, I don't think she is, either. Come on, Castle, you said so yourself, everyone needs a fairy tale. What's the harm in letting your mom have one of her own?
Castle: Okay, let's... let's change the subject to something less likely to give me an ulcer.

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Castle: He covered his bases.
Beckett: I know. It's really starting to piss me off.
Castle: Yeah. And you get cute when you get angry. (Kate looks at him.) But not when you get angry with me. (Kate smiles.)

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Beckett: And like any psychopath, he's a great actor. Oh, speaking of...
Castle: Psychopaths or actors?
Beckett: I was thinking about your mom.
Castle: Oh, so a little of both.
Beckett: I think we can make the play.
Castle: Really? You wanna venture into the dark scary woods?
Beckett: Don't worry, Castle, I got a gun. I'll protect you from the big bad wolf.
Castle: You'd use your gun on my mother? I'm touched. Thank you.

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Castle: Speaking of fairy tales, my mother is ready to give her encore performance.
Beckett: Time to go back into the woods?
Castle: Still got your gun?

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Martha: I turned down the role. Turned my back on fortune. And, it was the best career move I ever made. For an even greater role came my way. The part, perhaps the greatest role that I have ever played. That, of mother.
Beckett: (To Castle.) That's sweet.
Castle: You're right, that is sweet.
Alexis: Shh.
Castle: Sorry.
Martha: Now, if Richard had only been able to embrace the role of son with the same level of commitment...
Castle: And, into the woods we go.
(Beckett takes his hand.)

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Beckett: So what, you're prince charming now?
Castle: Well, if the shoe fits...

  --  Once Upon a Crime [4.17]
%
Martha Rodgers: Guess who I ran into at the beauty parlor today?
Rick Castle: Mother, I'm at a critical juncture and...
Martha Rodgers: Oona Marconi.
Rick Castle: Oona Marconi, the theater critic?
Martha Rodgers: I thought I might invite her to dinner, ask her to give a little mention to my acting school, put it into one of her columns. It would be invaluable publicity
Rick Castle: Yes, well, that would depend on the mention. You aren't forgetting her blistering review of your performance of Maggie in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, are you?
Martha Rodgers: That was 1983. I think I'm over it.
Rick Castle: "Martha Rodgers as Maggie the Cat is more of a helpless kitten, mewing and flapping her hands when she doesn't get her way."
Martha Rodgers: You memorized it?
Rick Castle: I couldn't help it! You walked around the apartment quoting it for months. Mother, I'm just saying, maybe it's not a good idea to ask an important favor of someone who's been so unkind to you in the past.
Martha Rodgers: The operative word here is past. I think I can rise above. Besides, my acting school is more important to me than some old grudge.
Rick Castle: Well, that's very mature of you, Mother.
Martha Rodgers: [walking away] Thank you.
Rick Castle: "If Tennessee Williams knew what crimes Martha Rodgers had committed against this audience in his name, he would have her arrested for assault."
Martha Rodgers: Rising above.

  --  A Dance with Death [4.18]
%
Beckett: This is the weirdest spending spree I have ever seen. Odette spent tens of thousands of dollars on clothes but nothing in her size according to these receipts. Everything's in size four.
Esposito: And I went through her apartment. I didn't see a hundred grand worth of new clothes. Maybe she hid 'em.
Castle: Sounds to me like the old gas card scheme.
Beckett: What do you mean?
Castle: Your parents put you on a strict allowance, but they give you a gas card so you can fill your car. You fill your friend's cars and they give you cash. Some of my buddies in boarding school nearly doubled their allowance.
Beckett: Uh huh.
Castle: Not me, of course. That ... Don't tell my mother.

  --  A Dance with Death [4.18]
%
Alexis: Based on my reading of the coroner's report, I can see why Graham Morton's death was ruled natural causes. However...
Castle: Ooh! There's a "however."
Lanie: A very big however. [to Alexis] Tell them.
Alexis: There were some anomalies I found suspicious. Evidence of petechiae in both eyes. Fresh bruising on the right side of Mr. Morton's nose, which could have happened if, say, someone was holding a pillow over his face. All in all, I think there is ample evidence that Mr. Morton was murdered.
Castle: [to Lanie] Ample? [Lanie nods] Murdered. [grabs Alexis and hugs her] I am just so proud.
Alexis: Dad. Work. Boundaries.
Castle: Right.

  --  A Dance with Death [4.18]
%
Martha: Honey, do you ever wonder why I never visited you in the precinct the first year you were working there?
Castle: I always thought it was because of the harsh lighting.
Martha: Well, that was a consideration.

  --  47 Seconds [4.19]
%
Gates: I have a special task for you. I hear that you're quite the speed reader, and in the time that I've known you, you've shown, well, on occasion, an exceptional attention to detail.
Castle: That's the first time you've ever payed me a compliment. Go on.
Gates: We've conducted over a hundred interviews so far. Someone needs to review them swiftly looking for information that can help us ID our suspect. And I believe you're my best man.
Castle: (He turns to Kate.) I think she's finally starting to like me.
Gates: No, I'm not.
Castle: (Whispers.) Wearing her down.

  --  47 Seconds [4.19]
%
Beckett: Okay, so you remember what happened after the bomb went off, but not before.
Bobby: It must have been one of those traumatic amnesia things.
Beckett: Bobby. Don't lie to me.
Beckett: I'm telling you, it was all a big blank. It was the trauma.
Beckett: It was not the trauma. You don't get to use that excuse.
Bobby: I swear, I don't remember.
Beckett: The hell you don't remember. Do you wanna know trauma? I was shot in the chest, and I remember every second of it. And so do you.
(Castle is watching from the observation room.)
Castle: All this time. You remembered?

  --  47 Seconds [4.19]
%
Castle: You're a pretty smart kid, you know that?
Alexis: Well, they say genius ... skips a generation.
Castle: Apparently so does funny.
Alexis: Eat your pancake.

  --  47 Seconds [4.19]
%
Beckett: I'm telling you, something happened. Something changed. It's been weird between us lately.
Lanie: Lately? Kate, it's been weird for four years.
Beckett: No, this is different. He's different. It's like he's pulling away.
Lanie: Well, can you blame him? He's probably tired of waiting.
Beckett: Waiting for what?
Lanie: What do you think? The guy is crazy about you, and despite your little act, you're crazy about him. (Kate looks at her.) Oh, what, was that supposed to be some big secret?
Beckett: Yes. No. Do you think he knows?
Lanie: You remember how he used to be? Girl on either arm. You really don't see that guy too much anymore. Why do you think that is? He's waiting for you.
Beckett: Yeah, but Lanie...
Lanie: I know. You're dealing with stuff. But you cannot ask him to wait forever. Unless, of course, you're okay with him pulling away.
Beckett: What if it doesn't work? What if it ends up like you and Javi?
Lanie: Well, at least we gave it a shot. And so it didn't work out, so what? Now we can move on, give or take the occasional booty call.
Beckett: I just, I don't wanna lose what we have, you know?
Lanie: Girl, please. What exactly do you have, really?
Beckett: A friendship.
Lanie: No. what you and I have is a friendship. What you and Castle have is a holding pattern. How long can you circle before the fuel runs out?

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Lanie: Don't think you were saved by the bell, Kate Beckett. As your friend, I'm not gonna let this drop.
Beckett: So, what? You think I should tell him how I feel?
Lanie: Yes. You hunt murderers for a living, you can do this.
Beckett: Okay. Okay. I just, I have to find the right time.
Lanie: No time like the present.
(Castle drives up in his Ferrari with a blonde in the passenger seat.)
Lanie: What the? On second thought, maybe you should wait a bit. What's that? Ryan's calling, I gotta go.

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Beckett: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Castle: Yeah, that we should throw a party and hire a bunch of models.
Beckett: No. that maybe Naomi somehow got into that party last night and that that's where she met her killer. That's what I was thinking.
Castle: Weird. We're usually more in sync than that.

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Colin: What's she like? Your captain?
Castle: You ever see that Youtube video with the grizzly bear that decapitates a moose with one swipe of its paw?
Colin: Comforting.

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Castle: Ryan, you'll be here, front door, dressed as a flower delivery boy. Esposito, you'll be here, dressed as a hobo.
Esposito: Question. Why does a brown man gotta be a hobo?
Castle: You want the flowers?
Esposito: Hobo it is.
Castle: You boys will cause a distraction here, whilst I rappel down the side of the building with Nikolai.
Ryan: Who's Nikolai?
Castle: He's a Romanian gymnast I found on Youtube. He's extremely flexible, and fits in the duffel bag. Using a glass cutter, I...
Colin: Excuse me, gents. Has anyone seen Detective Beckett? (He walks in wearing a suit. Kate walks in from the other side, wearing a dress.)
Ryan: Wow. Are you guys going out?
Colin: I pulled some strings and got us into a party at the British consulate tonight.
Beckett: Nigel will be there, we'll get his prints and he won't even know it.
Colin: Cheers, lads.
Ryan: Or they could do that.
Castle: Yeah, sure. You want to do it the easy way.

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Castle: Hey there.
Beckett: I feel like I just walked into a bad episode of  Miami Vice.
Castle: Okay, first, there are no bad episodes of Miami Vice. Second, who died?
Beckett: You, from the looks of it. You look like you just got run over by a truck.
Castle: Yeah. A truck delivering a shipment of awesome.

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Beckett: [Examining the victim's body] Hey Lanie, how does it look?
Lanie: Like you waited too long.
Beckett: [Pointedly] The vic.
Lanie: She was strangled. But she went down with a fight. Prelim suggests a sign of a struggle. She took one to the face.
Beckett: Well-dressed, attractive woman in a seedy motel and a guy who flees the crime scene. This might have been a one-night stand gone wrong.
Lanie: Are we talking about the victim or Castle?

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Lanie: Where's Castle?
Beckett: He took off for a lunch date.
Lanie: In a Ferrari full of flight attendant?
Beckett: Yeah, he's probably trying to rack up his frequent flyer miles.
Lanie: I'm sorry. But you know she's just a passing thing.
Beckett: Do I? I mean, the guy has been divorced twice, and he's still chasing bimbos. Maybe that's just who he is.
Lanie: Look, maybe it's the wrong time or maybe he's even the wrong guy, but if he is, how long are you gonna wait to find out? Ten years, I've been keeping them [referring to the dead bodies in the morgue] company while they spend a night or two here on their way to where we're all going. They all had plans, Kate, things they were gonna do when they got around to it Go on a cruise, lose 10 pounds, fall in love. They thought they had all the time in the world. But nobody does.

  --  The Limey [4.20]
%
Slaughter: Speaking of partners, I've seen pictures of yours. She's smoking hot. You're tapping her, right?
Castle: What? No.
Slaughter: Oh. What's wrong with you?
Castle: There's nothing wrong with me. We're just friends.
Slaughter: A man needs a friend, he gets a dog. Woman like that, you storm the beaches or die trying, come on.

  --  Headhunters [4.21]
%
Castle: You're not gonna mangle anyone today, are you?
Slaughter: I like to keep my options open.

  --  Headhunters [4.21]
%
Slaughter: Detective. You ever wanna go on a date that ends in hot sex after a drunken fist fight, you know where to find me.
Beckett: Yeah, in never gonna happen land.

  --  Headhunters [4.21]
%
Slaughter: [as they are about to enter a bar, looking for a suspect] You packin'?
Castle: Packing? No; I'm not a cop. My vest says 'Writer' on it
Slaughter: [hands Castle his ankle gun] Rule number 3: You ride with me, you ride strapped. C'mon
Castle: Hey... hey. What about regulations?
Slaughter: You signed a waiver, didn't ya?... OK, you take the front; I'll go in the back
Castle: Whoawhoawhoawhoawhoa. Shouldn't we call for backup?
Slaughter: You got a skirt says 'Writer' on it, too?

  --  Headhunters [4.21]
%
Perlmutter: Oh, our intrepid heroes have arrived. And Castle.
Castle: Ah, Perlmutter. I will treasure these special moments we've shared.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Castle: That's a lace cuff. Hand-stitched. Pearl buttons. I'd say this was circa 1870.
(Everyone looks at him.)
Castle: I did a lot of research on the era. I was writing a book. A comedy about the Civil War. Turns out - not so funny.
Perlmutter: You don't say.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
[After listening to the 911 phone recording]
Castle: Now, Charlie made this 911 call moments after the attack. Does it sound like he's faking to you?
Beckett: It sounds like Charlie's having a psychotic break. What if his guilt made him snap and he created a fantasy in which zombies killed David and not him?
Castle: I'm not so sure. I mean, his voice does have that authentic ring of pants-wetting terror.
Beckett: You do not believe in Charlie's story.
Castle: I believe he believes it.
Beckett: Okay, well, whatever you believe, all evidence points to the fact that Charlie Coleman is our killer.
Esposito: Maybe not all the evidence. CSU analyzed that bite mark on Charlie's arm. Turns out that it matches the bite mark on our victim.
Beckett: Maybe Charlie bit David and then he bit himself?
Esposito: Well, I was thinking the same thing, but CSU also says that the bite marks weren't made by Charlie's teeth.
Castle: Oh, wait, um... Sorry. Let me make sure I understand so that I might properly relish this moment. You're saying the evidence shows that Charlie and the victim both were bitten by an as yet unknown third party?
Esposito: That's what I just said-
Castle: Perhaps even a mindless, shuffling undead third party?
Beckett: Castle, just stop. There's no such thing as a zombie.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
[After watching the security camera tape which reveals the killer as...]
Castle: My friends... that, is a zombie.
[walks out and announces]
Castle: Our killer's a zombie! [Slaps hands with a woman walking by]

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Martha: You're rather upbeat, considering you said this was your last case with Beckett.
Castle: That's because I am going out with a bang. I have one word for you, Mother. Zombie.
Martha: Too much makeup?
Castle: You look lovely. I'm referring to our victim being killed by one of he walking undead. And I mean that literally. A zombie. Security camera caught him in all his putrefying glory.
Martha: Whoo. I don't suppose you downloaded this video, by chance?
Castle: Absolutely not. That video is police property. It would be very, very wrong of me to get a screen grab of it and e-mail it to myself.
Martha: Well, it'll be our little secret, darling.
[Both move over to the tablet on the nearby table]
Castle: I'm actually surprised at your interest in this case, Mother.
Martha: Well, I really do know the difference between a first-rate makeup job and actual decay. You wanna see some real zombies, check out the red carpet at the Tony Awards.
[Notices the chest piece to his Laser-Tag and picks it up]
Castle: I thought I... I thought I put this away.
[Martha steps away from him. Castle notices and immediately realizes he's been set up] 
Castle: [Looking around] Where is she? Where is she?
[The chest piece beeps and Alexis swoops down on a hook-rope in her Laser Tag suit, cackling manically]
Alexis: [Speaking villainously] You were a fool to buy my act yesterday, and now you've fallen right into my trap.
Castle: [Dramatically] You will pay dearly for your treachery. [To Martha] Et tu, Mother? For luring me here?
Martha: Why, whatever do you mean?
Castle: Mmm. [Back to Alexis] That's my girl.
Alexis: [Unhooking herself from the rope] So what's this about a zombie?

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Beckett: He won't leave?
Ryan: Charlie's pretty convinced about this whole zombie thing.
Beckett: Yeah, but that's just... That's ridiculous.
Castle: Or is it? Charlie has not been wrong yet. Maybe our killer is Patient Zero, out there right now in the streets of New York, building an army of the undead.
Beckett: Castle, what we are looking for is not a zombie, but a very smart criminal who murdered David Lock and is now making our only witness look crazy. And he also dressed up in makeup and a costume to hide his identity.
Castle: Unless that's not costume or makeup.
Ryan: I mean, he does look like a real zombie.
Esposito: A real zombie? I'm embarrassed for you, bro.
Beckett: Okay, then explain this. Why would a zombie go after a currency trader at 4:00 am in a garage?
Castle: This one's easy. The more intelligent the victim, the more delicious the brains.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Beckett: What did you find at the crime scene canvass?
Esposito: Nada. Only in New York can some guy dress like a frigging zombie and walk down the street unnoticed.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Ryan: I'm telling you, that guy was dead.
Esposito: Remind me never to choke on a chicken bone in front of you.
Ryan: Hey, you checked that guy! So did the paramedics.
Beckett: Whoa, you guys! I'm sure that there's a medical explanation for it.
Castle: Oh, there's an explanation, alright.
Beckett: Besides that one.
Castle: Come on, you were there, you saw it. He rose from the dead.
Beckett: He didn't rise from the dead, Castle. He wasn't dead in the first place.
Esposito: He's not a zombie, Castle. He's just a murderer.
Castle: Well, then, what was his motive for murder, Detective Esposito? Kyle sold insurance. He had no criminal record. There's no evidence he even knew our victim.
Beckett: He's a human killer, with a human motive
Castle: Or he's a zombie killer, with a zombie motive

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Beckett: (Running from the room.) Castle, call for backup!
Castle: (He grabs the phone, then looks at the keypad.) How, how do I...?
Perlmutter: Nine. Nine.
Castle: Nine. (He presses it.) Is there a police code for 'zombie on the loose'?

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Ryan: Castle, do you really believe in all this zombie stuff, because I would swear on my nana's grave that Kyle Jennings was dead.
Castle: No. You know what I do believe in? Driving Beckett crazy.
Ryan: Yeah, I have to say, it's good to see you guys hitting it off again.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Beckett: You think he remembers?
Castle: When a life altering moment occurs, people remember.
(After a pause.)
Beckett: Well, maybe it's too big to deal with. Maybe he... can't face it just yet.
Castle: You think he ever will be?
Beckett: Hopefully. If he feels safe.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Castle: How does somebody put something like that behind them? He's gonna need therapy.
Beckett: It helps. First he won't even be able to deal with it. It's gonna take everything that he's got to just put one foot in front of the other and get through the day.
Castle: I didn't know you were seeing a therapist.
Beckett: Yeah, well, I didn't wanna make any excuses, I just wanted to put in the time, do the work. But I think I'm almost where I want to be now.
Castle: And where is that?
Beckett: In a place where I can finally accept everything that happened that day. Everything.
Castle: I think I understand.
Beckett: And, um, that wall that I was telling you about... I think it's coming down.
Castle: Well, I'd like to be there when it does.
Beckett: Yeah, I'd like you to be there too.
Castle: Only, without the zombie makeup.
Beckett: I don't know. I kinda think that the zombie makeup suits you, Castle.
Castle: Yeah, I make it work.
Beckett: Tomorrow?
Castle: Tomorrow.

  --  Undead Again [4.22]
%
Beckett: Of course you don't understand why she's taking her graduation speech. You were probably the guy that had nothing on but boxers underneath his gown.
Castle: That is so insulting. If you must know, I was naked underneath.
Beckett: Oh, I'm sorry. I stand corrected. So, how is the father of the graduate taking it?
Castle: I already have a plan to drown my sorrows after the ceremony. My mother goes off to the Hamptons, Alexis will be doing her all nighter. I will be distracting myself with a double feature of The Killer and Hardboiled.
Beckett: Wow. That is a double feature.
Castle: You like John Woo?
Beckett: The bloodier the better.
Castle: (He stops walking.) You wouldn't wanna... join me, would you?
Beckett: Actually, I'd love to. (She keeps walking, then stops to look at him again.) You coming, Castle?
Castle: Yeah. (He follows, smiling to himself.)

  --  Always [4.23]
%
[Castle is at Beckett's apartment telling her to stop with her mother's murder investigation]
Castle: Kate.
Beckett: What's wrong?
Castle: You, um, You have to stop. This investigation, you--you have to stop.
Beckett: Castle, we already talked about this. I'm fine. I'm in control.
Castle: No, you're not. They are. And if you don't stop, they will kill you, Kate.
Beckett: What are you talking about?
Castle: Before Montgomery went into that hangar, he sent a package to someone, someone...he trusted. It contained information damaging to the person behind all this. Montgomery was trying to protect you. But the package didn't arrive until after you'd been shot. Montgomery's friend struck a deal with them. If they left you alone, the package and the information inside would never see the light of day. But they made one condition-- you had to back off. And that's the reason you are alive, Kate, because you stopped.
Beckett: How do you know this?
Castle: In order for the deal to work, someone had to make sure yo weren't pursuing it.
Beckett: Are you a part of this?
Castle: I was just trying to keep you safe.
[Beckett is shocked and in disbelief]
Beckett: By lying to me about the most important thing in my life?
Castle: That lie was the only thing that was protecting you.
Beckett: Castle, I didn't need protection. I needed a lead, and you sat on it for a year. Now who is this person? How do I find him?
Castle: He's a-a voice on the phone. He's a shadow in a parking garage.
Beckett: You met with him? How do you know that he's not behind my mom's murder? How do you know that he's not involved? And how the hell could you this?
Castle: Because I love you. But you already know that, don,t you? You've known for about a year.
Beckett: Are you kidding me? You're actually bringing this up right now, after you told me that you just betrayed me?
Castle: Kate, listen to me --
Beckett: Listen to you? Why should I listen to you? How am I even supposed to trust anything that you say
Castle: How are you s-- Because of everything that we have been through together! Four years, I've been right here! Four years just waiting for you to just open your eyes and see that I am right here. And that I'm more than a partner. Every morning, I-I bring you a cup of coffee, just so I can see a smile on your face. Because I think you are the most remarkable... maddening... challenging... frustrating person I've ever met. And I love you Kate, and if that means anything to you, if you care about me at all, just don't do this.
Beckett: If I care about you? Castle, you cut a  deal for my life like I was some kind of a child. My life. Mine. You don't get to decide.
Castle: You keep going with this. They're gonna decide. They're gonna come for you Kate.
Beckett: Let them come. They sent Coonan and he's dead. They sent Lockwood and he's dead. And I am still here Castle. And I am Ready.
Castle: Ready for what. To-To die for your cause? This isn't a murder investigation anymore, Kate. They've turned it into a war.
Beckett: If they want a war, then I will bring them a war, straight to their doorsteps.
Castle: Well, I guess there's just nothing I can say is there?... O.K. Um. Yeah, You're right Kate. It's your life. You can throw it away if you want to, but I'm not gonna stick around to watch you. So, this is, uh, over. I'm done.

  --  Always [4.23]
%
Ryan: Hey, Javier. Man, this just feels wrong. We need to tell Gates.
Esposito: Why? So she can send Beckett home? You think that's gonna work? You think that's gonna stop her? She's gonna investigate this case, Kevin, whether she's on it or not. The least we can do is make sure that we have her back.

  --  Always [4.23]
%
Castle: How's your speech coming?
Alexis: I have watched or read every graduation address ever written and compiled all the best advice into one speech. And then I read it out loud, and guess what I sounded like? A pompous ass. I'm 18 years old. What the hell do I know?
Castle: [Embraces her] Hey, look, everything you know, everything you will know is what's true for you.
Alexis: And I know everything's changing. Everything's going to be different. And I'm so scared.
Castle: Of what?
Alexis: Moving on.
Castle: Write about that. [Kisses her forehead] That feels true.

  --  Always [4.23]
%
Castle: Beckett. What do you want?
Beckett: You. (She steps inside and kisses him.) I'm so sorry, Castle. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. (She kisses him again.)
Castle: (Pushing her away slightly.) What happened?
Beckett: He got away, and I didn't care. I almost died and all I could think about was you. I just want you.

  --  Always [4.23]
%
Alexis:(While giving her graduation speech.)There's a universal truth we all have to face whether we want to or not. Everything eventually ends. As much as I've looked forward to this day, I've always disliked endings. The last day of summer. The final chapter of a great book. Parting ways with a close friend. But endings are inevitable. Leaves fall. You close the book. You say good-bye. Today is one of those days for us. Today we say good-bye to everything that was familiar, everything that was comfortable. We're moving on. But just because we're leaving, and that hurts... There are some people who are so much a part of us they'll be with us no matter what. They are our solid ground, Our North Star, and the small clear voices in our hearts that will be with us... always.

  --  Always [4.23]
%
Castle: So it wasn't a dream?
Beckett: No. you definitely weren't dreaming.
Castle: And you were right. I had no idea.
Beckett: So you liked it?
Castle: Yeah.
Beckett: Even the part where...
Castle: Especially that part. I love that.
Beckett: Good. Me too.

  --  After the Storm [5.1]
%
Gates: How do you explain the fact that Maddox, the killer we're searching for and the man who shot you last year, is the one lying there dead?
Castle: Bad karma.

  --  After the Storm [5.1]
%
Bracken: What do you want, Ms. Beckett?
Beckett: The truth.
Bracken: Never expect that from a politician. Besides, if you really had information, wouldn't you already know the truth?
Beckett: Roy Montgomery, McCallister, John Raglan, my mother. Everyone that you've ever had killed, I want you to admit to it.
Bracken: Your mother's death was a tragedy, and I am deeply sorry for your loss. But I can't give you what you want. When I was fourteen, I got to be friends with this boy in the neighborhood, Lamar Dokes. Sweet kid. I used to help him with his homework after school. Well, one day, he doesn't come to school. so I went by his apartment and the door was open. I walked in and...I found Lamar lying on his mattress... dead; his little sister the same way. His mother was in the bedroom. She had hanged herself. Now she left a note. She'd list her job. She was being evicted. And I thought, how could a woman be so desperate, so without hope, that she could crush up pills, put them in hot chocolate, and give them to her kids? And that was the moment, the moment I knew I wanted to help make people's lives better. And I have. I strengthened the safety net to protect kids like Lamar. I created jobs in those neighborhoods. I've done great things. Just as you've done great things.
Beckett: Who do you think you're talking to? How can you justify yourself to me? My mother was stabbed in an alley because of you. She bled to death alone in a pile of garbage! So save me your campaign speeches about the great things.
Bracken: You sound a bit delusional, you know? But then again, who are you? You're a disgraced cop, obsessed with her mother's murder. And who am I? I'm a decent man looking out for the little guy. That's who the public sees. And every time they elect me, I'm humbled. I strive harder to live up to that ideal. I want to be that man. And I won't let you or anyone else get in my way.
Beckett: I don't think you're in a position to threaten, senator.
Bracken: See, here's what you don't understand. It's not who has the gun, it's who has the power. Do you really think that's you?
Beckett: I have the file. Smith had another copy. 08672241. That's the number of the bank account where you deposited the money orders. So you're right. It is about who holds the power. Now I could release that file and destroy you, but what would that mean for my life expectancy? So here's how it is. The deal that you had with Smith, that's our deal now. And if anything happens to me or anyone that I care about, that file goes public. Am I clear? That's a yes-or-no question.
Bracken: Yes.
Beckett: And one more thing. Whoever it is you think I am, whatever it is you think you know about me, you have no idea what I'm capable of or how far I will go. I am done being afraid. It's your turn now. [swings pistol at the Senator's face] That's gonna leave a nasty scar. Every time you see it, think of me.

  --  After the Storm [5.1]
%
Gates: Your resignation has been accepted. The matter's settled.
Beckett: Sir, I have the top case-closure rate in the precinct. And now that the man that shot me is dead, that particular case will no longer be an issue.
Gates: Really? Because it seems to be the gift that keeps on giving. I'm told we put a Michael Smith under guard at the hospital. What was his role in this?
Beckett: I don't know.
Gates: I don't believe you. You're covering for someone and I know who it is. But I don't intend to dig up the past and tarnish Roy Montgomery's reputation. The fact is, I admire your loyalty. I hope you feel that for me someday.

  --  After the Storm [5.1]
%
Lanie: Welcome back.
Beckett: Thank you.
Lanie: What are you... you doing something different?
Beckett: No. why?
Lanie: I don't know. Something's changed.

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Lanie: I figured out what's different. You're having sex.
Beckett: Excuse me?
Lanie: Oh, don't try to deny it. There's a glow. I know that glow. So, who's the guy?
Castle: Yeah, Beckett, who's the guy?
Beckett: Nobody that you would know, okay?
Castle: Are you sure? I know a lot of guys.
Beckett: I'm sure.

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Beckett: Isn't she the reporter that shows up to cover stories in her bikini?
Castle: I don't... is... I didn't notice that.
Beckett: You wanna try it again? Make it sound a little more convincing?
Castle: No. I'm good.

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Beckett: Do you actually buy this whole 'just friends' thing?
Castle: It's possible.
Beckett: Yeah, it's possible. But it's not probable.
Castle: I don't know. You and I were just friends for four years.
Beckett: Except you were trying to sleep with me that whole time.
Castle: What?
Beckett: Mmm hmm.
Castle: Excuse me, it was you that was trying to sleep with me.
Beckett: What?
Castle: Don't tell me you dress like that for Esposito.
Esposito: What's for me?
Beckett: Nothing.
Castle: (At the same time.) Don't worry about it.

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Castle: The direct tox monitor, of course.
Beckett: You have no idea what that is.
Castle: No, not a clue.

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Ryan: Hey, guys. I found out who Mandy-
Esposito: Yo. Are you...wearing makeup?
Ryan: No.
Esposito: Really? Because an hour ago, you and I both had black eyes, and now you don't.
Ryan: No, this is not makeup. This is tinted moisturizer.
Esposito: [Sarcastically] Oh.
Ryan: Jenny just stopped by. She happened to have some in her purse and I figured since... [stutters a bit] Fine. Just judge all you want.

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Castle: Look, I tried everything to get away. I-I hid under the counter. I was hiding in the bathroom. At one point I tried to pull a Cape Fear up under the piano.
Beckett: Yet when I walked in, she was straddling you on the couch
Castle: Right? She's like the Terminator of sexpots.
Beckett: What is that even supposed to mean? She just keeps on coming?
Castle: What? That's... [grabs her arm and pulls her to the side] The only reason I went on the date in the first place was because you made a big deal about being single in public.
Beckett: Castle, I have 12 missed phone calls from Chip the sportscaster because he thinks that I'm single, but that doesn't mean that I'm gonna let him mount me in a Speedo just to prove it.
Castle: You didn't tell me he called.
Beckett: Really? You're gonna play the jealousy card now?
Castle: Okay, look, I'll make it up to you, all right? Whatever you want.
Beckett: What I want is not to have this image of a bikini-clad woman stuffing her boobs in your face. So good luck with that.
Castle: Don't I even get credit for figuring out who the killer is.
Beckett: No!

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Beckett: Can we say that we will talk about dating other people, but we won't actually date other people?
Castle: Yeah, I can...No, I can do that.
Beckett: Okay, good. 'Cause I have a gun and you don't really have a choice.
Castle: Clearly, I don't have a choice.

  --  Cloudy with a Chance of Murder [5.2]
%
Castle: My little girl is going to college.
Martha: Seems like just yesterday you were checking under the bed every night promising her that monsters aren't real.
Castle: I lied. Monsters are real. They're the boys in her freshman dorm.
Martha: Oh, speaking of which, before Alexis leaves, don't you think you should have then, um... talk with her.
Castle: You mean the sex talk? Mother, I covered that ages ago. I learned so much.
Martha: I mean the you and Beckett sex talk.
Castle: Mother, Beckett and I haven't...
Martha: Save it. Richard. I knew the morning I walked in here and the poor girl was hiding in the closet.
Castle: How did you know that?!
Martha: Mothers know these things. But I don't think you want Alexis to walk in unannounced and find you and Beckett... out of the closet. And by out of the closet...
Castle: I know, I know what you mean by out of the closet.
Martha: So, don't you think you should tell her?
Alexis: Tell me what?

  --  Secret's Safe with Me [5.3]
%
Beckett: Even on the worst days there's a possibility for joy.

  --  Secret's Safe with Me [5.3]
%
Beckett: Yeah, well, the key to Wendy's murder might be in that junk and we're about to lose it. There's no way I can get a warrant in time.
Castle: May not have a warrant, but I got something better. Checkbook.
Manager: Auctions are cash only, hotshot.
Castle: Oh, no. What are we gonna do? Is 2 grand enough?
Beckett: What are you doing with 2 grand in your pocket?
Castle: I'm a best-selling author. Why wouldn't I have 2 grand in my pocket?

  --  Secret's Safe with Me [5.3]
%
[Bringing in the stuff from the locker auction]
Castle: You are so going to owe me for this.
Beckett: Castle, I don't know if the department's gonna be able to reimburse you for all of this.
Castle: [Whispering] That's not the owing I mean.

  --  Secret's Safe with Me [5.3]
%
[Watching Gates with the collectable doll]
Esposito: Who knew that Gates had a softer side? It's, um...
Ryan: Creepy. Very, very creepy

  --  Secret's Safe with Me [5.3]
%
[To Angelica when they learned who the killer is]
Castle: I've worked a lot of murder cases, waiting patiently for the day I could unequivocally exclaim... [Turns around and points to Kirby] "The butler did it!"

  --  Secret's Safe with Me [5.3]
%
Alexis: How can you be so smart and so clueless at the same time?

  --  Secret's Safe With Me [5.3]
%
Castle: I so wish I could kiss you right now.
Beckett: Yeah, I know.
Castle: This is me, softly touching your face, pulling you in for a long slow kiss.
Beckett: This is me, kissing you back, running my fingers through your hair.

  --  Secret's Safe With Me [5.3]
%
[After seeing a bloodied man stumble into the pool.]
Castle: Call 911
Beckett: [Scowling at him] You think?

  --  Murder He Wrote [5.4]
%
[Trying to find out who Beckett's boyfriend is.]
Ryan: We're thinking the most likely scenario is that it was the last guy that she was with.
Esposito: Doctor Joshua Davidson.
Ryan: Mm-hm.
Esposito: It's him, isn't it?
Lanie: Okay, I get that you don't have a life, Javi, but you're married, Kevin, so what's your excuse?
Ryan: I-
Lanie: Whoever Beckett's boyfriend is, is none of your business.
Esposito: Come on, Lanie. You must know who it is. She went back to Josh, didn't she?
Lanie: Is this how you interrogate people? 'Cause you ain't doing nothing but pissing me off.

  --  Murder He Wrote [5.4]
%
[Over the phone]
Ryan: Hey, Castle. Yeah, I'm gonna put you on speakerphone so you can weigh in on this.
Castle: Weigh in on what?
Esposito: Well, we're in the morgue with Lanie trying to figure out who Beckett's boyfriend is.
Lanie: I have nothing to do with this nonsense. [walks away]
Castle: Yeah, until you're bagging their mangled bodies when Beckett finds out.
[Beckett smiles]
Esposito: Pfft! Like we're afraid of Beckett. [Chuckles]
Ryan: Besides, how's she gonna find out?
[Castle quickly snatches the phone away before an infuriated Beckett can grab it]

  --  Murder He Wrote [5.4]
%
Beckett: Why are you even helping them?
Castle: Oh, come on. The good news is, they're completely fooled about us.
Beckett: Yeah, well, I don't understand why they even care.
Castle: Ah, why do people care about Brangelina?
Beckett: Oh, so we're Brangelina now?
Castle: No. No, no, we're Rick-ate. No, we're Kat-ick.
Beckett: Mmm...
Castle: Cas-kett. Ooh, that's good! 'Cause of the whole murder thing. Caskett?
Beckett: Mm-hm

  --  Murder He Wrote [5.4]
%
Beckett: So, you rich or something?
Castle: I'm not James Patterson rich, but I do ok.

  --  Murder, He Wrote [5.4]
%
Castle: You're in a room full of detectives and not one of them has a clue.

  --  Murder, He Wrote [5.4]
%
Castle: Jewelry. I never would've thought of that.
Beckett: I guess I'll have to remind you when my birthday's coming up.
Castle: Why, Detective Beckett, was that a hint you just dropped?
Beckett: Why, Mr. Castle, I do believe it was.
Castle: Shameless.

  --  Probable Cause [5.5]
%
Beckett: They still haven't found the body.
Castle: They won't. He's not dead.
Beckett: Castle, what are you saying?
Castle: This was never about me. This was about him. Those initials in her datebook, he's not that careless. He wanted us to find that place. He wanted us on this bridge. Tessa's murder, the frame up, all of it was to get us here so we could help him do what he couldn't do for himself. Disappear, so he can start killing again.
Beckett: You think he planned this?
Castle: How does a wanted man stop being wanted? [Thumbs the bridge] It has to be public, and it has to be final.
Beckett: Do you know how crazy that sounds?
Castle: No one's gonna be looking for him anymore.
Beckett: You shot him. He's dead. It's over. [Walks away]
Castle: For now.

  --  Probable Cause [5.5]
%
Castle: I am a fan of good sci-fi. Star Trek. Battlestar. That Joss Whedon show.

  --  The Final Frontier [5.6]
%
Castle: Perlmutter. Good to see you.
Perlmutter: Ah. If only the feeling were mutual.

  --  The Final Frontier [5.6]
%
Beckett: So I was a Nebula 9 fan. Big deal.
Castle: Oh, you were beyond a fan. You dressed up in costume. You.
Beckett: Okay, yes. I was a sci-fi loving, costume-wearing geek. And you know what? Not ashamed of it or of Nebula 9. Despite what you think, it was an awesome show.
Castle: Hmm. I'll tell you what. I'll forgive you your terrible taste if you try on that Nebula 9 costume for me.
Beckett: In your dreams.
Castle: Look at my life. My dreams come true.

  --  The Final Frontier [5.6]
%
Beckett: Are you saying...
Castle: She was killed by a phaser?!
Perlmutter: Well, as much as it pains me, Mr. Castle is largely correct. She was killed by a high-intensity laser beam.
Castle: A real sci-fi murder at a sci-fi convention. This keeps getting better.

  --  The Final Frontier [5.6]
%
Castle: Well, let's go back to the e-mails of the crazed Nebula 9 fans. And when I say 'crazed fans," I'm not referring to you. You are a megafan.
Beckett: Nice one. Coming from the guy with the life-sized Boba Fett in his bathroom.
Castle: Point taken.

  --  The Final Frontier [5.6]
%
Ryan: We found blood-stained overalls in his van. We sent them to be tested to see if they match the blood from our vic.
Esposito: Oh, they match. Trust me, bro. You don't have to worry about this creep hurting anyone ever again. [To the camera] That's a gift, from me to you. You're welcome, America

  --  Swan Song [5.7]
%
Ryan: Well, looks like our stalker was telling the truth. Prelim shows that the blood on his overalls was his. Sorry, partner.
Esposito: Huh. Well, at least grabbing the guy up wasn't a total bust.
Ryan: I don't know. Seems to be the definition of a total bust.

  --  Swan Song [5.7]
%
Castle: This all points to one thing.
Ryan: Drugs.
Castle: Drugs... Drugs.
Beckett: That's an interesting theory, but that's pure speculation.
Castle: Actually, it's not. Pure speculation would be Swan purchasing thermonuclear technology to have a scientist make him an amplifier that went all the way to 12. This, musicians buying drugs... [Into the camera]...that's just Monday morning's crossword.

  --  Swan Song [5.7]
%
Esposito: Element of surprise is key. See, I can be circumspect. Folks would be lost without me. [Walks toward a door]
Castle: [Laughing into the camera] He went the wrong way.

  --  Swan Song [5.7]
%
Castle: You were writing songs for him?
Sam Spear: Yeah. Here, look. [Grabs the song paper and hands it to Esposito] I already started. I got pretty far on that one.
Esposito: Let me see that. [Looking it over] I do like the vocal line on this.
Castle: You read music?
Esposito: What, you think 'cause I'm a cop, I can't sing?
Castle: No, I think you can't sing because I've heard you sing.
Esposito: That karaoke machine was busted. I'm gonna sing for y'all later

  --  Swan Song [5.7]
%
Castle: So John Campbell was in town...with a few days to kill. [Grinning at the camera] See what I did there? That was good. Use that. Not the part where I said, 'See what I did there.' Cut that out. Do a hard fade to black. [Snaps fingers] Musical sting.

  --  Swan Song [5.7]
%
[As Beckett leads the cameraman]
Beckett: Look, I know I'm not the easiest person on the planet to get to know, but you guys have been patient, and I've got something to show you. It's a secret. Actually, Castle doesn't even know about it. It's this place that I love to go to. And once you see it, I think you guys will understand me a whole lot better. [Opens a door] Go ahead. All the way to the back.
[Camera walks into a janitor room and turns about to see Beckett give a raspberry and then shut the door]
Cameraman: Hey! Hey!

  --  Swan Song [5.7]
%
Castle: I'm just saying, there have been worse dinners.
Beckett: Like what?
Castle: Well, the dining scene from Alien comes to mind.
Beckett: Honestly, a creature bursting out of my dad's chest might have lightened the mood.

  --  After Hours [5.8]
%
Castle: Well, this looks like the work of a pro.
Beckett: Someone had a priest assassinated? It's like a Vatican conspiracy. Ah. It's The Da Vinci Code.

  --  After Hours [5.8]
%
Ryan: Nun walks into a precinct... It's like the beginnings of a bad joke. [Begins fixing his tie]
Esposito: You wanna borrow a comb of something?
Ryan: Shut up.
Esposito: You know what this reminds me of? Watching one of those body-switching movies where the guy looks like a grown man, but he's actually 12.
Ryan: Hey! Let me tell you something. Catholic school is like combat. Unless you've been there, you don't know.
Esposito: Uh, I have, been there, in combat. And it's way worse than some old lady.

  --  After Hours [5.8]
%
Martha: Captain Gates? Captain Gates.
Gates: What are you two doing down here?
Martha: Well, after I got a call from Detective Esposito, I became very concerned, so I checked in with-
Jim: I can't reach Katie. What's the situation?
Gates: There's no cause for alarm. It's just that we're having trouble pinpointing their precise location-
Martha: Oh, please stop. You are a terrible actress. There is no way that anyone would've called me if they weren't really worried, and I wanna know what is going on here.
Gates: Okay. They went to interview a witness and we lost contact. But we're doing our best to find them. So I suggest you both go home and I'll call you the second I know more.
Martha: I am not leaving until I know what has happened to our children.
Jim: Neither am I.
Martha: All right, where is that fancy coffee machine that Richard bought for the precinct? Over there?
Gates: The break room.
[The two walk away and Ryan approaches Gates]
Gates: [Whispering] I don't want to have to tell those two that I lost their kids. Tell me you have something on Dolan.

  --  After Hours [5.8]
%
Castle: I also found a box of tools and a broken CB radio. But I think I can get it to work.
Leo: Great. You have an engineering degree or electronics experience?
Castle: No. But I've seen every episode of MacGyver.

  --  After Hours [5.8]
%
Leo: [To Beckett] Nervous?
Beckett: No. I'm, uh, I'm just trying to send a message. They can hear static when I press the button, so I thought I'd send an SOS, but...
Leo: It's okay to be worried.
Beckett: [About Castle] He's gonna be fine. He's, um, he's smart and he's resourceful, so...
Leo: Larger than life, from another world.
Beckett: How did you...
Leo: Please, we're in a basement. Sound carries, I heard.
Beckett: That was a personal conversation.
Leo: About how different you two are, and that worries you, right?
Beckett: I don't want to have this discussion right now.
Leo: And those differences that are so charming now, they may end up just pulling you apart.
Beckett: Who are you, Dr. Phil?
Leo: No, Just a guy that may die tonight realizing that life's short. Trust me. Living your life for now makes a lot more sense than worrying about the future.

  --  After Hours [5.8]
%
Ryan: We're putting up the tree the other day, Jenny says to me, "It just doesn't feel like Christmas without kids." She wants to try. But I come to work, I watch the news, every day... it seems like the world's falling apart. How am I supposed to bring a kid into that?
Esposito: The world's always falling apart, bro. Since the beginning of time. But having kids, making a family, that's what keeps it together.

  --  Secret Santa [5.9]
%
Ryan: Hey, so I heard from Air Traffic Control, but you're not gonna like the news. They have no record of anyone flying over the park during the time our guy hit the ground.
Beckett: How is that even possible?
Castle: Santa had his sleigh in stealth mode

  --  Secret Santa [5.9]
%
Gates: My mother-in-law is a licensed pilot, as she keeps reminding me. Part of a larger effort to make me feel inferior. I'm sorry. Did I just say that out loud?
Ryan: Sounds like she's staying with you, Captain?
Gates: One day soon, your in-laws will visit, too. And when they do, think hotel. [walks away] Oh, Lord, I hate the holidays.
Castle: [sotto voce] Yet another quality she has in common with the Grinch

  --  Secret Santa [5.9]
%
Esposito: ...he didn't go all Santa for the money. Back in the day, he used to pull down a half a mil a year. As Santa, he made a tenth of that.
Ryan: You can make that much as a Santa? Maybe I should switch jobs, huh?
Esposito: What? Gain 200 pounds and have a bunch of rug rats sitting on you lap with dirty diapers?
Ryan: [With a disgusted face] Yeah, thanks for the visual.

  --  Secret Santa [5.9]
%
Rick Castle: You volunteered to take Eldin's shift. Don't pretend. If you aren't ready, why not just tell me?
Kate Beckett:I'm sorry, Castle. I didn't mean to...
Rick Castle:You didn't mean to what?
Kate Beckett: Christmas means something different to me than it does to you.
Rick Castle: It's Christmas. I mean, how can it be different?
Kate Beckett: Castle, every winter, as soon as that chill rolls in, I'm right back there in that alley. January 9th, and we still hadn't taken our Christmas decorations down. And by the time my dad and I did, it was like we were putting Christmas away forever. We haven't opened those boxes since.
Rick Castle: I didn't know.
Kate Beckett: That's why, every year, my dad goes up to his cabin. And ever since I became a rookie, I have taken the Christmas shift. Because I know that there are families out there that are celebrating together in their homes and I am keeping watch, and that is my tradition. And that is important to me. It's as important as your tradition is to you. And I'm sorry, Castle. I thought I could let that go, but I...
Rick Castle: I understand.

  --  Secret Santa [5.9]
%
Beckett: He might have been robbed.
Castle: Uh, robbed and then launched into space?
Beckett: And how is that less plausible than your sleigh?
Castle: I think you mean less "clausible."

  --  Secret Santa [5.9]
%
Gates: [Looking down at her ringing phone] Oh. Speaking of people having their homes stolen.
Beckett: Is that your mother-in-law again, sir?
Gates: Detective, if you happen to receive a report of a homicide tonight at my address, do me a favor. Ignore it.
Beckett: [Laughs] Yes, sir.

  --  Secret Santa [5.9]
%
Beckett: Good Morning, Lanie.
Lanie: Not from the way you sound. What's wrong?
Beckett: Men are clueless.
Lanie: Men... or just Castle?
[Both women glare over at Castle]

  --  Significant Others [5.10]
%
Beckett: Did she have a grievance with Michelle?
Ryan: Oh, I'd say so. The morning of Michelle's murder, a judge came down with a ruling in Samantha's contentious divorce case. She lost big.
Castle: How big is big?
Ryan: Uh, Upper East Side apartment big, cars and boats big, half of her multi-million dollar net worth big.
Castle: That's big.

  --  Significant Others [5.10]
%
[After Beckett accepts Meredith's offer for dinner between the two of them]
Castle: Is this a bad as it seems?
Esposito: No, it's much worse. Much, much worse.
Castle: No, okay, hang on. Let's take a step back from this, let's just think about it. Just dinner.
Ryan: Just dinner between your ex-wife and your new girlfriend. That's deadly. Castle, you have two worlds;
Esposito: Two.
Ryan: Right now, they're both coming together.
Esposito: Uh, oh.
Ryan: What happens when worlds collide?
Esposito: Boom.
Castle: Okay, guys, you are taking this a little too far.
[Castle turns to leave, but Esposito grabs his arm]
Esposito: Castle. Meredith knows things about you.
Castle: So?
Esposito: So...
Ryan: So...
Esposito: So is there anything Meredith knows that you don't want Beckett to know?
[Castle looks away briefly before turning back in realization]
Esposito: Boom.
Ryan: Two worlds colliding.
[Castle hurries out of the room]

  --  Significant Others [5.10]
%
Castle: Here's something that doesn't add up. Tyrese Wilton's phone. Why would Shane tell Joey to steal a phone worth a couple hundred bucks? Especially when there had to be so much bling at that party?
Esposito: Dude, nobody says "bling" anymore. Try "shine."

  --  Under the Influence [5.11]
%
[Esposito confronts Shane in the bar]
Shane: You keep showin' up here like this, my boys are gonna think you're sweet on me.
Esposito: Not anymore, they won't. You are walking on grand larceny and accessory after the fact. Wow. Now that kind of luck does not last long.
Shane: I guess I gotta go play the Powerball tonight then.
[Esposito pulls up two guns and places them on the table in front of him]
Esposito: This is my gun. And this one will be yours. You ever go near Joey, or any other kid ever again, the story's gonna go like this. 'You pulled that piece on me. Now, I had to defend myself, so, I killed you'. You understand me? Or should we play out that story... [Pushes one of the guns toward Shane] ...right here, right now?
Shane: [Sighs] Ah. I hear you.
Esposito: Good.

  --  Under the Influence [5.11]
%
Esposito: [Handing Joey a card] Here. If you need anything, day or night, call me at that number.
Joey: Okay. You're all right. For a cop.
Esposito: I know. Now get out of my car

  --  Under the Influence [5.11]
%
Esposito: Behold Monster.
Castle: More like Cookie Monster.

  --  Under the Influence [5.11]
%
Esposito: Yo. How's the in-breast-igation going?
Ryan: And that's why you're still single.

  --  Death Gone Crazy [5.12]
%
Ryan: I, uh, never thought I'd say this after graduating the sixth grade, but our bra research is in!

  --  Death Gone Crazy [5.12]
%
[Examining the murder weapon, a bra]
Lanie: This is a 36-D Sultura.
Beckett: Oh, that's high-end.
Lanie: Definitely. One of these could run you $200, $250.
Esposito: 250$ dollars for a bra?
Lanie: Oh, but its okay to spend that on a pair of sneakers, right?
Esposito: A pair of sneakers is practical, okay? They gotta support your, um..
Castle: [Shaking his head] Eject.
Esposito: Okay.

  --  Death Gone Crazy [5.12]
%
[Speaking privately]
Bracken: Well. Hard to miss the irony of this situation.
Beckett: [In monotone] Senator Bracken, do you have any enemies? Is there anyone that you can think of that would like to kill you?
Bracken: I get threatening letters and e-mails all the time, comes with the office. My chief of staff keeps a file.
Beckett: Anyone with a legitimate claim?
Bracken: A man doesn't get to my position with upsetting people along the way. Most of them aren't crazy enough to wanna try to kill me. Present company excluded.
Beckett: [Sitting down] You know, Senator, I'm not the one that you should be worried about right now.
Bracken: It's just us here, Detective. A shooter on the loose, me in the crosshairs? Must be a dream come true for you.
Beckett: In my dreams, I'm the one that gets to pull the trigger. But you know what? If you're not comfortable with me leading this investigation, you're welcome to step outside and tell everyone why.
[Bracken settles back]
Beckett: Well, then I guess we're stuck with each other. So, then let me make one thing clear. This man killed Melanie Rogers, and when someone commits murder, whoever he is, Senator, I will bring him to justice. No matter how long it takes.

  --  Recoil [5.13]
%
Castle: Considering what he's capable of, you would think Bracken would have more formidable enemies.
Beckett: Oh, obviously you never saw the letter that I sent him.
Castle: I did, actually. I like the way you dotted the "I" on "kill" was a little heart. It was a nice touch.
Beckett: Well, I was trying to give it a personal feel.
Castle: Well done.

  --  Recoil [5.13]
%
Castle: Any reason why he'd [Noah] suddenly want you dead?
Bracken: I assume because someone paid him a great deal of money.
Castle: You don't seemed shocked.
Bracken: There's another world out there, Mr. Castle, one that most people don't see. Run by money, influence, power. And the people in it will do anything they can to stay on top. But I assume that you already know that.
Castle: I wouldn't have done it, you know, what she did. I'd have stood and watch.

  --  Recoil [5.13]
%
[After Captain Gates held a small excursus about "Wives Of Wall Street"]
Castle: You're a fan of "Wives Of Wall Street"?
Gates: Oh yes, the best show on TV, why?
Castle: I don't ... I just assumed that, uh, a woman like you would prefer more ... sophisticated fare.
Gates: [Indignantly] Excuse me, what did you just say?

  --  Reality Star Struck [5.14]
%
Beckett: Please tell me you didn't get me a lightsaber for our first Valentine's Day together.

  --  Reality Star Struck [5.14]
%
Castle: Spoiler alert.

  --  Reality Star Struck [5.14]
%
Castle: [Beckett is talking to Stevens, with no luck] I'd like a minute with him. [Beckett leaves the room]
Douglas Stevens: [Castle closes and locks the door to the room] I just said I don't wanna talk, so you can't question me. I have rights. I'm not going to say anything without a lawyer.
Castle: I'm not a cop
Douglas Stevens: Then who are you?
Castle: You remember the girl with the red hair? I'm her father. Please know, I will do whatever it takes to get her back. The police outside are my friends... my daughters' friends too. So it's just you and me.
Douglas Stevens: If you touch me I'll press charges...
Castle: I don't care. Where are they?
Douglas Stevens: I'm just a driver. I, I don't know anything...
Castle: You know Henson ditched the van for the black Yukon. So where did he go? Where did he take the girls? [Stevens refuses to answer] I won't ask you again, where did he take the girls? [when Stevens still refuses to answer, Castle closes his eyes for a few seconds, then slowly opens them]
Douglas Stevens: [Beckett standing watch, hears Stevens' screams] *Stop!* [continues screaming]

  --  Target [5.15]
%
[Over the phone]
Castle: Have them trace every IP address that accessed that site after 2:36 p.m.
Beckett: Which might take time, depending on-
Castle: What if she doesn't have time?
Beckett: Castle, listen to me-
Castle: Don't. Don't promise me you'll find her unless you can do it, because I would never forgive you...any more than I'd ever forgive myself.

  --  Target [5.15]
%
Beckett: Tell me what happened with Douglas Stevens.
Castle: [gravely] I appealed to his humanity
Beckett: I didn't think you had that side to you.
Castle: When it comes to the people I love, I do.

  --  Target [5.15]
%
Hunt: What do you say kid? You been playing cop for years. You ready to play spy?

  --  Hunt [5.16]
%
Esposito: Paris? What the hell is he doing in Paris?
Beckett: He thinks he can find her.
Ryan: What, so he's Liam Neeson now?
Esposito: Liam Neeson? The dude's barely Ashley Judd.

  --  Hunt [5.16]
%
Beckett: Ms. Degarmo, I'm gonna ask you again. What else can you tell me about Roger Henson's murder?
Degarmo: I don't have to tell you nothing. I know my rights. You can't keep me here.
Beckett: He's dead. Tortured. I'm just trying to find the people that did it to him.
Degarmo: Listen, bitch. I don't talk to cops. Now go get me my lawyer, and then go to hell
[Beckett kicks the chair, sending Degarmo to the floor]
Beckett: [Rising from her seat, enraged] Do you have any idea what this is all about?! You think I'm some beat cop busting you on possession charges?! My partner's daughter is missing, and you...! [throws the photos of Henson at Degarmo] ...are in my way. Now, you don't talk to cops? I'm not a cop today, honey.

  --  Hunt [5.16]
%
[After being rescued]
Castle: [after his phone gets shot to pieces]What are you doing?! That was a 200 dollar phone!
Hunt: That's how they track you. Now get in the car.
Castle: Hey, I'm not getting in the car!
Hunt: Don't be an idiot, I'm the good guy.
Castle: Oh, you expect me to trust you.
Hunt: Well, you're alive, aren't you? What are you gonna do; stay out here in the woods with all the dead guys?
Castle: Fine. I'll get in the car.
Hunt: Given that you're feeling so bad about your 200-buck phone, you might wanna pick up that 3 million dollar briefcase ...take it with you.
Castle: At least tell me your name.
Hunt: Hunt. Jackson Hunt.
Castle: Sounds made up.
Hunt: [grinning] It is.

  --  Hunt [5.16]
%
Castle: You're telling me you're a spy?
Hunt: "Intelligence asset" is the term.
Castle: My dad's a spy.

  --  Hunt [5.16]
%
[As Castle and Beckett walk into the autopsy room]
Perlmutter: Ah, Detective Beckett, and Defective Castle

  --  Scared to Death [5.17]
%
Castle: Okay, does anyone have a better solution? Because we need one. If not for me, at least for Beckett.
Beckett: Castle, that's so sweet. You want me to outlive you?
Castle: Of course. Who else is gonna tell my tale of sacrifice and selflessness?

  --  Scared to Death [5.17]
%
Beckett: Okay, so both of our victims stayed at that inn at the same time. So, maybe they were having an affair.
Ryan: Well, in 2008, Val would've been 24. Jason would've been 66. An affair would've been-
Castle: Gross.
Ryan: I was gonna say unlikely.

  --  Scared to Death [5.17]
%
Esposito: Deep cover? I can't believe he didn't tell me.
Beckett: Espo, he didn't even tell Jenny.
Esposito: Yeah, but I'm his best friend. She's just the wife.
Beckett: Thus proving why there is no Mrs. Esposito
Esposito: Hey. It's hard to find a woman for this much man.

  --  The Wild Rover [5.18]
%
Ryan: My name is not Fenton. It's Kevin Ryan. And I'm a cop.
Bobby S: What?... Cop?
Ryan: Yeah. And I'm placing the three of you under arrest.
Bobby S: Well, that'll be a hell of a trick considering Liam's about to shoot you and your girlfriend.
Ryan: Wait a second, Liam, before you do that, let me ask you a question. Where's your cell phone, huh?
Liam: What?
Ryan: Remember when we tussled back in the hall? Yeah, I picked your pocket. And then when you weren't looking, I dialed my partner and left the line open.
Liam: No way.
Ryan: He heard exactly where we were going.
Bobby S: Liam?
Liam: He's full of crap, Bobby. He's bluffing.
Ryan: Oh, am I? Why don't we meet my partner, huh?
[loudly]
Ryan: Yo, Javi, where you at?
[after a moment, Esposito approaches with his shotgun drawn]
Esposito: Right here, bro.
[Bobby, Liam, and Bobby's thug all draw their guns]
Ryan: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, he is former Special Forces. You do not wanna draw on him. Wanna meet the rest of my crew?
[loudly]
Ryan: Hey, Beckett!
Beckett: [approaching from behind Bobby] You called, Ryan?
Ryan: Don't let the looks fool you, boys, you don't want to mess with her either.
[loudly]
Ryan: Castle!
Castle: [stepping out from his hiding place behind Beckett] Seriously? I didn't... I didn't bring my vest.
Ryan: [to Bobby and Liam, as squad cars approach] Drop your weapons! Now.

  --  The Wild Rover [5.18]
%
[being led out of the precinct, Siobhan spots Ryan]
Siobhan: Fenton?
Ryan: Siobhan?
Siobhan: Fenton!
[Siobhan runs up to Ryan and, in front of Jenny, kisses him full on the mouth]
Jenny: Hey! What the hell are you doing? That's my husband!
Siobhan: You're married? [slaps Ryan]
Castle: Whoa, lady, you can't slap a cop.
Siobhan: You're a cop? [slaps him the other way; patrol cops carry her away]
Castle: Oh!
Siobhan: Ugh! You liar! You son of a bitch! How could you? Get off of me! Let go!
[as things settle down, Jenny looks at Ryan]
Ryan: [awkward pause] I can explain.

  --  The Wild Rover [5.18]
%
[Interrogation room]
Ryan: Maggie. You know, I pegged you for a lot of things. Never a killer.
Maggie: Yeah, I pegged you for a lot of things, but never a narc.
Ryan: Actually, see, I'm a homicide detective. Which is why I know that you killed Jimmy the baker.
Maggie: Jimmy the who?
Beckett: Oh, God. Are we actually gonna play this game? It's late, I'm tired. Officers went through your house and they found your gun.

  --  The Wild Rover [5.18]
%
[Returning to his home]
Ryan: Sorry, Jenny. I know it wasn't fair to you.
Jenny: Just tell me the truth. Is this part of your life, this undercover part, over?
Ryan: Yeah, it is now.
Jenny: Good, because I need to know that you're gonna be here. And I need to know that I can depend on you. Especially after the test result we got back from the fertility doctor.
Ryan: Oh, no. Bad news?
Jenny: Yeah. We took all those damn tests for nothing. [Ryan begins to look crestfallen] I'm already pregnant.
Ryan: You're pregnant. [laughs] You're pregnant! Uh... Let's pop some champagne.
Jenny: Yeah.
Ryan: No, no, we can't pop any champagne.
Jenny: No, we can't.
Ryan: Do you know why?
Jenny: [simultaneously] I'm pregnant!
Ryan: [simultaneously] Because you're pregnant!
[The two kiss]

  --  The Wild Rover [5.18]
%
Ryan: There's only two things to do at the docks; kill someone or go fishing. It's a little late to go fishing, isn't it?

  --  The Wild Rover [5.18]
%
Ryan: Castle, how's the knee?
Castle: It's not the knee so much as the *boredom*.
Esposito: I thought you writers liked being alone.
Castle: Yeah, if I could write. But the painkillers make me a little loopy. Last night, I used the word 'speculate' three times in the same sentence.
[Ryan sees a pair of binoculars and looks through them]
Ryan: Hmm. You must be bored. You've actually gone "Rear Window".
Castle: Alexis got me those as a joke to cheer me up. I have not *yet* resorted to voyeurism.
Ryan: Then you are missing out.
[whistles]
Esposito: What? Let me see.
[they fight over the binoculars]
Ryan: No. Hey!
Esposito: Give me the binoculars!
Ryan: Dude, she was just about to take off her towel.
Esposito: [using binoculars] Oh, the towel's off.
Ryan: Yeah?
Beckett: [comes up behind them] Unless the body that you're looking at is dead, I suggest you drop those binoculars.

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
Beckett: Tommy "The Shark"'s alibi holds. He was with some associates at a nightclub that he owns.
Esposito': It doesn't mean he didn't send of one of his boys.
Beckett: Look, if he killed Clara, he wouldn't have talked to me. No. Hiding the money, planning to disappear. Something else is going on here. So what've you got on the husband?
Ryan: Oh, not much. He's a manager at a big name supermarket in Queens. No priors. Been married seven years. Oh! And he took a million-dollar life insurance policy out on his wife only three months ago.
Esposito: Huh. That's not suspicious.

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
Castle: Well, maybe next time you'll think twice about being cheating cheaters.

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
Ryan: [To Beckett] Staring at the phone won't make it ring. I learned that in junior high.

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
After revealing the whole scene across the street was staged
Castle: It was all fake? Nothing was real - you let me think I was crazy, you let me think you were gonna die!
Beckett: But Castle, you were so bored over the past couple of weeks, stuck at home with no case to solve, and I saw that this apartment was for rent, and I thought that...
Martha: Richard...
Castle: No ... no ... this is ... without a doubt ... the greatest birthday gift of my life!

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
Beckett: This is not an emergency!
Castle: I caught him red-handed. Literally red-handed.
Beckett: Oh, so then it's gotta be blood.
Castle: What else could it be?
Beckett: Red paint, tomato juice, beets, red velvet cupcakes.
Castle: He bought a tarp and rope. He brought them into the bedroom, where I'm betting, right now, he's cutting her into portable pieces. Get a warrant. Search that place before there's no evidence left.
Beckett: Esposito spoke to the girl. We know she's alive.
Castle: How do you know it's the same girl? It's possible he someone to be his alibi.
Beckett: Or it's possible something else entirely is going on here. Look... I know that you're lonely and that you miss me. I miss you, too. But you don't have to keep making up things to have me come back here.
Castle: Whoa, whoa, whoa. You think this is a ploy to get you here?
Beckett: Look, I don't mean to be like...
Castle: No, I know what you mean, all right? And I know what I saw.
Beckett: All right, you know what? I have to get back to the precinct.
Castle: Wow. You really don't believe me.
Beckett: I'll be back later.
Castle: You know what? Don't worry about it. I'm fine.

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
Castle: I saw him red handed. Literally, red handed!

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
Beckett: Unless the body you are looking at is dead, I suggest you put down the binoculars.

  --  The Lives of Others [5.19]
%
Esposito: I may have an explanation for those facial wounds. Turns out our victim worked at a retirement home called Haven House.
Castle: Vicious, bloodthirsty old folks? Is that your theory?
Esposito: This home is not for people, Castle. It's a primate sanctuary, mostly for apes and chimpanzees and monkeys who have retired from the movie business.
Ryan: I always wanted a monkey when I was a kid. Big Curious George fan.
Castle: Yeah, wait till George grows up. An adult chimpanzee can reach 200 pounds, tear off a man's face, hands and naughty bits.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
Esposito: Gentlemen! I hate to rain on your parade.
Castle: Do you?
Esposito: No.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
Beckett: Castle. Castle, please. No more Wookie calls.
Castle: It's not Wookiee. I'm not doing Wookiee. I can't do Wookie. Alexis does a really cute Wookie.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
Beckett: You know, Castle, there's a bit of poetic justice in this.
Castle: Poetic justice, how?
Beckett: Well, I mean, think about it. You set a trap for Alexis and now someone or something, has set one for you.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
Kurt: A few months ago, I came out of hiding to find Anne. I told her I was innocent, that I didn't kill Justine and I begged her to look into the case. And she agreed to because she believed me.
Beckett: Yeah, well, I'm a little more skeptical.
Castle: I can vouch for that.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
[When Alexis explains what happened to her allowance money]
Castle: Well, why didn't you just come to me?
Alexis: Because I didn't want the speech.
Castle: Well, I don't...What speech?
Alexis: That people like us need to be careful with the kind of money we have. People might try to take advantage.
Castle: Oh, that speech. Yeah.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
Castle: Did you see how that gorilla looked at me?
Beckett: I think it was lust actually Castle. You are ruggedly handsome.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
Castle: Shouldn't you be wearing a short skirt for this? That's the rule.

  --  The Fast and the Furriest [5.20]
%
Castle: Looks as though you two were enjoying yourselves.
Beckett: Castle...
Castle: What about pajamas? Homely flannel or skimpy sleep shorts?
Beckett: Oh, my gosh, you're sounding like my dad dropping me off at summer camp.
Castle: Did they serve champagne at your summer camp?
Beckett: I was being polite. Castle, do you think I want this? Do you think I asked to be here?
Castle: I think you're making the best of it.
Beckett: You know I would rather be with you.
Castle: Well, then maybe I should stay. We could protect him together.
Beckett: No, I am not letting you do this. I'm not letting you turn this investigation into some kind of a *twisted* competition. Look, don't make this harder than it needs to be. Please.
Castle: Okay. But only because you said please.

  --  The Squab and the Quail [5.21]
%
Beckett: It's gonna be fine.
Eric: I know it is. I've worked with the best and you'd run circles around any of them. Before your first cup of coffee... I feel completely safe in your care.
Beckett: After knowing me for just two days?
Eric: No, after knowing you for two minutes.

  --  The Squab and the Quail [5.21]
%
[As Eric is leaving on the elevator]
Eric: You know, that's an extraordinary woman you have there.
Castle: I know.
Eric: Do you?

  --  The Squab and the Quail [5.21]
%
Beckett: [answers phone] Hey, Lanie. What's up?
Lanie: [on phone] Your cause of death. The poison was a chemically synthesized weaponized agent, similar to the organic compound saxitoxin.
Beckett: Saxitoxin?
Lanie: Mm-hmm. It usually occurs in shellfish, but not this version. Whoever created this had access to a pretty sophisticated lab. And this one's been supercharged. Speaking of supercharged, is it true that you're with Eric Vaughn? I mean, Kate, I know you love Castle and all, but girlfriend...
Beckett: Bye, Lanie. [hangs up]

  --  The Squab and the Quail [5.21]
%
Gates: Okay, I spoke with the Commissioner, and he's agreed to provide Vaughn with a protective detail.
Beckett: Uh, great. I actually have a few uniforms that I'd like to recommend for duty.
Gates: No. Mr. Vaughn has requested you.
Castle: He what now?
Beckett: Sir, I'm a homicide detective, not some bodyguard.
Gates: Trust me, I know. But this comes directly from the Commissioner.
Castle: Then why doesn't Vaughn just hire a private army? He can afford that.
Gates: I don't know why, Mr. Castle. I just know what my orders are. He wants Detective Beckett, and only Beckett. [turns and leaves]
Castle: Can he even do that?
Beckett: I think he just did.

  --  The Squab and the Quail [5.21]
%
Beckett: Would you rather play with a kid in an imaginary world or me in a real world?

  --  The Squab and the Quail [5.21]
%
Castle: You know how I get when I'm gaming. I'm like Gretzky.
Beckett: Well, at least Gretzky knew how to score.

  --  The Squab and the Quail [5.21]
%
Castle: We don't know that you're standing on a bomb. It could be nothing.
Beckett: Didn't feel like nothing. Something gave way under my feet. Felt like a trigger plate.
Castle: Could be wonky floorboard.
Beckett: With a metallic click?
Castle: Loose nail. That's how floorboards get wonky.

  --  Still [5.22]
%
Castle: What if we replaced Beckett with something of equal weight, you know? Just the old Indiana Jones bag-of-sand-golden-idol trick.
Beckett: Remember how that turned out?

  --  Still [5.22]
%
[After escaping from the bomb]
Beckett: Hey, Castle, listen... Thank you for staying with me.
Castle: Always.
[they lean in to kiss, but police sirens stop them]
Castle: That's...
[Ryan, Esposito, and Captian Gates get out of the car and come over to Castle and Beckett]
Castle: [to Ryan as they hug] Perfect timing.
Ryan: Definitely.
Esposito: [to Beckett] You good?
Beckett: Yeah, did she see it?
Esposito: No.
Gates: Glad to see you, Detective. Even you, Mr. Castle. I have to say, I don't know too many men who would've done what you did.
Beckett: Neither do I.
Gates: Oh, for heaven's sake, Detective. Just kiss the man.
Beckett: Sir, you know?
Gates: What? Do you think I'm an idiot? I needed to maintain plausible deniability, which I can continue as long as you two both act professionally at the precinct.
Castle: I know I can, but, Captain, she has a long history of coming on to me at work-
Beckett: I don't think it'll be a problem, sir.
Gates: Good. Meanwhile, as long as we're on neutral ground here, I'd say, uh... he deserves it, wouldn't you?
Beckett: Yes, sir, I would.

  --  Still [5.22]
%
Castle: Who's going to be your bomb buddy?

  --  Still [5.22]
%
Castle: I wish that I could kiss you. I wish so many things.
Beckett: There is no regrets. All in all, I think we've had a great run.

  --  Still [5.22]
%
Beckett: Well, we don't have a body, we don't have a crime scene, we don't have any witnesses, but-
Castle: At least we have each other.
Beckett: We still have a homicide to solve.
Castle: And that.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Castle: Do you think the military took him out?
Beckett: I don't see how they could.
Castle: Because they wouldn't cross that line?
Beckett: Because in my experience, huge bureaucracies don't act with that kind of efficiency.
Castle: That's comforting.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Beckett: How many drones were in the air this morning?
Hooper: That information is classified.
Beckett: Colonel Fortis, was there a drone flying over New York City at 8:15 a.m.?
Col. Fortis: That's classified.
Castle: Okay, how about this? Did anyone else have access to the drones? Any federal agencies? Corporations?
Castle & Col. Fortis: That's classified
Beckett: Okay, then I'd like to take a look at your flight logs-
Col. Fortis: This meeting is over.
Hooper: Keep in mind, the waivers you signed prohibits you from discussing what was said here.
Castle: Nothing was said here.
Hooper: Well, then we shouldn't have a problem.
Castle: Touche.
Beckett: [noticing a man in the next room] That man over there, he was at the crime scene. Who is he? Does he work for you?
Castle: Don't bother. It's classified.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Stack: So what do you want to know?
Beckett: Why don't we start with who are you?
Stack: Jared Stack. Special Investigator for the Attorney General's office.
Castle: I've never heard of it.
Stack: [whispering] You're not supposed to.
Beckett: And what's your connection to Dale Tanner?
Stack: Tanner was under scrutiny by the FBI, DHS and the Pentagon, not to mention the NYPD Counter-Terrorism Unit. Somebody objective needed to look into his death, so they picked me.
Beckett: When did you realize that he was killed by a drone and not a car bomb?
Stack: Once our people examined the wreckage.
Castle: Why the fake ID?
Stack: I didn't know where this was headed. The AG needs deniability.
Castle: "The secretary will disavow all knowledge of your actions." It's Mission: Impossible.
Stack: Pretty much. I'm even wearing a mask.
Castle: Really?
Stack: [whispering] No.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Stack: The fact is, we've lost a number of drones, some of them have fallen into enemy hands.
Beckett: So one of our enemies killed Tanner? With a drone?
Castle: That theory is highly improbable. And coming from me, that's saying something

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Castle: That's Warburg? I was expecting-
Ryan: Dr. Evil?
Castle: Or someone a little less nerdy.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Castle: Warburg is here. I can feel it.
Beckett: Castle, you've said that about every place we've been to so far.
Castle: Yeah, but this time I mean it. The Force is stronger with this one.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Beckett: I don't understand what a car driving through the desert has to do with Dale Tanner.
Warburg: [holding the photo up] Intelligence reports said there were three high-ranking Afghan militants in this car. It was the right make and model, traveling at a high rate of speed. So the drone pilot was given the green light to strike. But then, he saw those red dots on the trunk, and he had a feeling. So he aborted the mission. There were no militants in that car. The red dots were roses; because the young couple driving down that desert road had just gotten married. That's when I knew I could no longer be a part of the drone program.
Castle: But I don't understand why. The pilot didn't fire.
Warburg: Because the next generation of drones won't have pilots. The new AI software will give drones decision-making capability. They'll assess the data and take lethal action all on their own.
Castle: Really will be rise of the machines.
Warburg: Those new drones would turn that car to ash without hesitation. That's why, when lives are at stake, we need a man who sees roses. We need the human factor.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
[Answering the cell-phone]
Castle: For Richard Castle, press one. For Beckett, press two
Esposito: Yo, how about I just talk, jackass

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Stack: Detective Beckett, and Mr. Castle. Both the President and the Attorney General have asked me to convey their thanks for your work on this case.
Castle: [raising his hand] I don't suppose the President's appreciation could come in the form of a blurb for my book?
Stack: Yeah, that's not gonna happen.

  --  The Human Factor [5.23]
%
Esposito: Crystal Sky? That name's so fake it sounds like something out of one of your books.
Castle: Right? [chuckling at first, but then stops] Whoa. What is that supposed to mean?
Esposito: What do you mean, "What is that supposed to mean?" Derrick Storm, Nikki Heat, Jameson Rook? Would it kill you to name someone "Gonzales" every once in a while?

  --  Watershed [5.24]
%
Castle: Maybe Erika was some kind of Erin Brockovich, you know. A crusader for good, delving into the seedy underbelly of the legal system in order to uncover some seamy truth.
Beckett: Or maybe she was just hired by a rival firm to steal privileged information.
Castle: Now why must you be so cynical?
Beckett: It's in my job description.
Castle: Which is why you need me.

  --  Watershed [5.24]
%
Esposito: So no one at the law firm knew what she was looking for either?
Beckett: Either that or they're covering something up. But the only evidence of what she was up to is on that missing laptop.
Castle: So without it, we're dead in the water. Much like Erika.
[Castle and Esposito glance at each other]
Castle & Esposito: Too soon.

  --  Watershed [5.24]
%
[In the interrogation room with Martin]
Beckett: Do you have any idea how many people have sat across that table confess their sins to me? What makes you think you're any different? Any smarter? [Turns around] You've only been in this room for one hour. But this room... This room has been my life. My home. [Turning back] And I will not let you sit there and let you lie to me in my own home.

  --  Watershed [5.24]
%
[Beckett meets Castle at a swing set in a park]
Beckett: I'm sorry...I shouldn't have kept secrets.
Castle: It's who you are. You don't let people in. I've had to scratch and claw for every inch--
Beckett: Castle--
Castle: Please let me finish. I've been doing a lot of thinking about us, about our relationship. What we have. Where we're headed. I've decided I want more. We both deserve more.
Beckett: I agree.
Castle: So whatever happens...whatever you decide...[Castle gets off the swing and kneels in front of Beckett] Katherine Houghton Beckett...[he pulls out an engagement ring and holds it up] will you marry me?
[Fade to black--end of episode, end of season]

  --  Watershed [5.24]
%
[Beckett kisses Castle]
Castle: So that's a "Yes"?
Beckett: No, wait.
Castle: "No"?
Beckett: No, no, no, not... not "No."
Castle: So "Yes"?
Beckett: I...
Castle: Not "Yes"?
Beckett: No. Not "Not Yes". I... I...
Castle: You do know how this works, right?

  --  Valkyrie [6.1]
%
Castle: Kate, I'm not proposing to you to you to keep you here, or because I'm afraid I'm gonna lose you. I'm proposing because I can't imagine my life without you. If that means when things get difficult we have to figure them out, then I'm willing to figure them out. Assuming you're willing to figure them out with me.
Beckett: Well, in that case...Richard Edgar Alexander Rodgers Castle, yes. Yes. I will marry you.
[Castle grins as he slides the ring on her finger]

  --  Valkyrie [6.1]
%
Esposito: If your hero's fictional cop buddies are anything like your real   cop buddies, then they'd have real work to get back to. So, bye bye now.
Castle: What if our hero was offering Knicks floor seats?

  --  Valkyrie [6.1]
%
Beckett: Do you realize how many laws were broken by looking at that photo? Are you trying to get me fired?
Castle: Would make it easier to see you.
Beckett: Not if I was in jail.
Castle: Right.

  --  Valkyrie [6.1]
%
Beckett: Thank you, for not saying anything about Castle.
McCord: Look, when I was a year out of Quantico, I was busting my ass on this case, my first big chance. We'd been going at it straight for a month, and I really wanted to let off some steam, so I went to a bar, and I picked up a guy, and I took him home. Next morning he says, "Who's Scofield?" Scofield was the subject of our highly classified investigation.
Beckett: You talked in your sleep.
McCord: That's this job. Things happen. You better make sure they only happen once.

  --  Valkyrie [6.1]
%
McCord: You know what the hardest thing about this job is?
Beckett: What?
McCord: Knowing when to stop doing this job.

  --  Valkyrie [6.1]
%
Castle: So then...apart from the fact that I'm dying, I'm fine.

  --  Dreamworld [6.2]
%
Beckett: Thanks for backing me up with Castle
Rachel McCord: Is he always such a character?
Beckett: [Smiling] Yeah. That's what I love about him.

  --  Dreamworld [6.2]
%
Villante: If he has the toxin and the antidote, they'll find 'em
Castle: Thanks. For letting me be a part of this.
Villante: When you write your next novel, maybe you'll find a place for a dashing Colombian-American federal agent.
Castle: Consider it done.

  --  Dreamworld [6.2]
%
McCord: You want a coffee?
Castle: Ah, no. I'd rather die than drink any more of that sludge. [McCord makes a face and Castle winces] Too soon?

  --  Dreamworld [6.2]
%
Castle: ...Tell you what, though. Next time I say I'm dying to see you, let's keep it metaphoric.
Beckett: Deal.

  --  Dreamworld [6.2]
%
[After Beckett learns that nothing will be done about Reed]
McCord: You want everything to be black or white, I get it. But, in this town, it rarely is, and to do this job, you're going to have to make peace with that. But hey, that was a hell of a hunch about Mrs. Reed. [Beckett stands up and McCord follows] You should feel really good about this.
Beckett: Yeah, well that was Castle.
McCord: But you were smart enough to act on it. That was your call
Beckett: And you backed me up without even knowing my play.
McCord: That's what partners do. [Turns and walks away]
Beckett: [Turning back to the emergency room] Yeah. That's what partners do.

  --  Dreamworld [6.2]
%
Alexis: Morning Dad. I hope Pi and I didn't wake you.
Pi: We're making smoothies.
Castle: And yet, for me, not so smooth.

  --  Need To Know [6.3]
%
Perlmutter: Mr. Castle, you're back. But not by popular demand.
Castle: Good to see you too, Perlmutter

  --  Need To Know [6.3]
%
[After Beckett and McCord arrive at the precinct and take over the case]
Beckett: [Lowered voice] What are you doing here?
Castle: Me? What am I doing? What are you doing here? Why didn't you tell me you were coming to town?
Beckett: I was gonna surprise you.
Castle: Well done.

  --  Need To Know [6.3]
%
Ryan: Let's say Hank did embezzle money and killed Charlie to silence him. Why are the feds involved?
Castle: Well, maybe it has something to do with the Russians
Esposito: Well, if we knew the feds' angle, we'd have a leg up on solving this.
Castle: Sorry guys. I've yet to come up with a crazy, genius theory yet. [Realizes Ryan and Esposito had stopped walking]
Ryan: You don't need to. Not when you can go directly to the source.
Esposito: Get Beckett to give us the lowdown.
Castle: Okay, wait a minute...
Ryan: We get much-needed case information, you get to clear up any lingering doubts about your loyalty. Everybody wins.
Castle: Okay, guys, no, I can't do that, all right? After D.C., we promised we wouldn't-
Esposito: We did you a solid getting you on this case, Castle. It's time to pay up.
Castle: Guys, this is my fiancee, okay? What does it say about our future if I keep pushing the boundaries?
Ryan: Castle, you whole relationship is built on the foundation of your boundary-pushing.
Castle: ...Good point.

  --  Need To Know [6.3]
%
Castle: You know it must be weird for you, being back here at the precinct, working a case.
Beckett: Yeah. Yeah, it is.
Castle: Yeah, especially since McCord's little gag order prevents you from accessing your most effective investigative tool. [Hands her a cup of latte] Me.
Beckett: [Taking the cup] Yeah, you are a tool, all right. Wow.
Castle: So, uh, she's not here right now, so what's the harm in giving me a little tidbit?
[Beckett pauses, looks up at Castle, then the cup, and then back at him]
Beckett: This is a bribe. Castle, you're bribing me with a latte?
Castle: No, I am not. Come on. Don't be ridiculous.
Beckett: This is low, even for you.
Castle: Look, I can solve this. I just need a little more to go on.
Beckett: Castle, you're not gonna "Castle" me on this one.

  --  Need To Know [6.3]
%
[As Svetlana is being interrogated by Beckett and McCord]
Ryan: [To Esposito] Ha! You mocked Dewey. But not only was he a secret agent, look at that. [Points to Svetlana] He was a stud.
Castle: It's Romeo and Juliet. With a nerdy Romeo.
Esposito: And a smoking hot Russian Juliet.

  --  Need To Know [6.3]
%
Castle: Playing the anonymous source card? I mean, that is pure genius. It-it actually makes me love you more.
Beckett: Well, she's filing for asylum, and the State Department's gonna help relocate her, so, hopefully that'll keep her safe.
Castle: Yeah, but even working for the feds, you found the ultimate way to honor the victim. Charlie died trying to get Svetlana away from her dangerous family. You completed his mission.
Beckett: Yeah, but you would've done the same thing, Castle.
Castle: Yes. Yes, and I would love me more for doing it too.

  --  Need To Know [6.3]
%
Beckett: Castle. Are you asleep?
Castle: Yes.
Beckett: Then why did you answer me?
Castle: I'm sleep-talking. Also known as somniloquy. Just ignore me.
Beckett: I don't know what to do.
Castle: I have some ideas.
Beckett: No, Castle, I'm talking about my life. I don't know what to do about my life. I haven't been out of work since I was 15. I cannot believe that the FBI fired me, and I can't get my job back at the NYPD because of the commissioner's stupid hiring freeze. I might as well just apply to become a mall cop.
Castle: Ooh. You would look great on a Segway. You know, Beckett, you don't have to decide right away.
Beckett: Come on, Castle. What are you saying?  What am I gonna do, just sleep in every morning and screw around until the phone rings?  What kind of life is that?
Castle: Mine.
Beckett: (realizing)  Sorry.
Castle: I just mean that, you're with me, now. You don't have to work.
Beckett: I don't need to work?  Does that mean you're my...sugar daddy?
Castle: Oh. Hold on, that didn't...come out...actually, I'm still sleep-talking. I can't really be held responsible for whatever I say.
Pi: [Bursting into the room without knocking] Wow, even when you're fighting you two are super cute.
Castle: Pi...
Pi: Morning Mr. C, Mrs. C-to-be

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Negotiator: ...And then we'll put a plan together. All you have to do is talk.
Beckett: Well, if there's one thing you excel at, Castle, it's talking.

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Negotiator: So we're gonna need a code word that tells us that you need help. What, uh...What's your favorite food.
Castle: Oh. Um... Are we talking everyday food or fine dining? If desserts are included, there's-
Beckett: Cheeseburgers. He loves cheeseburgers.
Castle: I do enjoy a good cheeseburger.

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Castle: ...And I brought donuts.
Dr. Kogan: Hey.
Mickey Gerhardt: Um, gluten-free?
Castle: Dude, they're donuts. Either you're in or you're out.

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Emma: You weren't supposed to find out about Billy Koss. I mean, what is the point of a sealed record when the cops can open it whenever they feel like it?
Castle: I'm sure they got a subpoena first.
Emma: And I'm sure they all had a laugh off all the adjectives describing me, right? Manic. Bipolar. Violent. Murderer.
Castle: Well, not to be a stickler, but "murderer" isn't an adjective.
Emma: I'm not an idiot.
Castle: Sorry. I just get sarcastic when I'm nervous.

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
[After a hostage tries to disarm Emma, a shot went off and hits Castle]
Sergeant Roman: All units: Full breach! Go go go!
Emma: Oh my god, I killed Richard Castle!
[SWAT team enters the doctor's office and disarms Emma]
Sergeant Roman: We're gonna need the EMT right away! Let's go!
Beckett: [Kneeling over Castle] Castle?
Castle: Cheeseburgers! Cheeseburgers... How much worth ... [Pointing at the bulletproof vest] She dotted the I!
Beckett: Yes! [hugging Castle]
Castle: Aaah! Chest! Ouch, that hurts!
Beckett: Yeah, well, getting hit by a projectile travelling at a thousand feet per seconds can ... sting a bit...
Castle: Yeah, that's gonna leave a mark...
Beckett: All that matters is you're OK now...
Castle: Oh, I'm better than OK Beckett, I know who the killer is!

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Mr. Vance: [on the phone] No, I'm having breakfast with the judge
Ryan: Hi, Mr. Vance, I'm detective Ryan...
Mr. Vance: [still on the phone] No, he's a friend of a friend. [Chuckling] Yeah...
Ryan: [Taking the phone out of the hands of Mr. Vance] He's gonna need to call you back.

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Captain Gates: You ordered Aron Stokes in for questioning? Are you serious?
Esposito: You told us to build our case, and Mr. Stokes is where it went.
Captain Gates: This is a very powerful man who happens to be golfing-buddies with the police Commissioner.
Castle: So because he has a standing tee time with your boss, he gets away with murder?
Captain Gates: I'm handling the interview
Ryan: What? No, sir, this is our case...
Captain Gates: Yes, and it will be your jobs if there's any blowback. I am not gonna have you two risk your careers.
Kate: Captain, I don't have a career to risk. How about I back you up in there?
Captain Gates: Okay...
Castle: Captain, I too have no career to risk, why don't I ... [Gates sharply looks at him with her arms akimbo] maybe I should ... you know, I'm gonna do is I'm gonna stay here, I think you guys got this handled...

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Castle: [Glossing over his bulletproof vest] Wow. And to think you boys mocked me when I had this made four years ago. I think I'll have it framed.
Ryan: Hey, what does it say about your writing when your number one fan tries to kill you?
Castle: That was an accident.
Esposito: Been one inch high, it would've been a tragedy.
Castle: But on the bright side, your autographed copies of Deadly Heat would be worth way more.
[Ryan snaps his fingers as Beckett walks in]
Beckett: Not funny, Castle.
Castle: Little bit funny.

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Beckett: Listen, I'm kinda looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you so...don't do anything stupid in there, okay?
Castle: Don't worry. I think I already hit my stupid quota for the day

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Castle: No cheeseburgers. I repeat, no cheeseburgers. [hangs up and sees everyone staring] Cutting down on red meat.

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Lanie: Girl, what are you doing here?
Beckett: Uh, Captain Gates said that I could come.
Lanie: That's not what I meant. Shouldn't you be off looking at wedding venues or something?
Beckett: No, we haven't even set a date. We're just trying to enjoy our engagement. Why is everyone trying to rush us?
Ryan: You think you're being rushed now, wait until after the wedding. About ten minutes from the altar, they'll all be like "When are you two having a baby?"
Esposito: Well your wife's home alone because she's pregnant. What's your excuse?

  --  Number One Fan [6.4]
%
Beckett: What happening?
Lanie: Lot of weirdos out there with too much imagination is what happened. And yes, I'm looking at you, Castle.
Castle: Yeah, except I only commit my murders on paper. Don't actually do them. A lot more lucrative, a lot less prison.

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Esposito: Hey, caught a break on that stalker. Couple of nights ago, Shauna filed a harassment complaint. Apparently, three days ago, a guy confronted Shauna on her way home from work. Said the lives of half the people on the planet were at stake.
Castle: Whatever crazy theory I could've come up with, this is better.

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Ryan: 12-58, what do you think that means?
Castle: Time, address, Bible verse?

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Simon Doyle: Please listen to me, don't do this. Please. You have to let me go. If you don't, a billion people will die!
Esposito: Yeah? How are they gonna die?
Simon: I don't know. I only know that they do.
Esposito: Yeah? And how's that?
Simon: Because...I'm from the future.
Castle: [Whispering] This just became my favorite case.

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Doyle: Look, after the bloody energy wars of 2031, funneling
Castle: Energy wars!
Doyle: Yeah, you know fascists control the power, trying to control the world's energy supply for a select few - don't worry, we defeat them - turns out, that one of these new sources of power is a tachyon generator as it opens doors in time-stream continuum, allowing us to travel back in time! But of course because of the possibilty of abuse, it was technically regulated against, secret from the public...
Beckett: We have a witness that saw you leaving Shauna Taylor's apartment shortly after she was killed...
Doyle: I'm getting to that - look, I'm a temporal anthropologist. What we do is travel back in time and we study culturally significant eras - ancient Egypt, middle ages, man I've been to Nazi Germany!
Castle: Aren't you worried about the Butterfly Effect, a slightly change in something in the past thus altering the future?
Doyle: No, we're careful. The timestream is mostly self-correcting, you know? Any small changes like a little ripple [...] [snipping his fingers] doesn't matter, but if someone wants do do something big, if someonebody wants to do something massive, then yes, of course, you're damn right you can change the future! And by the way, that's exactly what just happened!

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Doyle: [agitated] Whatever chain of events has just started now will result in billions of deaths that did not otherwise occur, you understand me?

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Beckett: [on the phone] This is Detective Beckett, got a suspect at large, I'm gonna need patrol sweeps of the area along with a full CSU team at the scene.
Doyle: Real trauma, that one - can't believe you married her...
Castle: How did you know I marry her?
Doyle: One of your book jackets: you know, "Richard Castle lives in New York with his wife Senator Beckett and three children"
Castle: Senator...
Beckett: [turns around astounded] Three kids?!?

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Beckett: Who the hell is Paul Deschile?
Ryan: He's a 21-year old at Hudson getting his post-doc in theoretical physics
Beckett: Alright, get him into protective custody!
Ryan: He's on leave this semester, the university has no idea where he is, so in turn look for his parents...
Doyle: [agitated] Detective, it's him! Deschile!
Castle: You know him?
Doyle: [still agitated] Of course I know him, everyone knows him! Oh man, if he's killed...
Beckett: Yah, OK, I'll call you back - Doyle, sit down!
Doyle: No wonder billions of people die...
Castle: Hey, who the hell is Paul Deschile?
Doyle: [getting really agitated] The energy wars I told you about! The other side, a group of fascists, they were worse than the Nazis, the..they were slaughtering people by the ten-thousands, Okay? They were winning, until Deschile! He and his team they, they created an energy shield which was able to stop their weapons and completely turn the tide! Detective, listen to me! Ward is still obviously fighting for the fascists! They're trying to win the war by re-writing history! If he kills Deschile, there will be no energy shield, and without that energy shield, we lose that war! Ward's gonna kill Deschile, and that is why billions of people die!
Beckett: OK, we don't have time for this - take him to holding, please...

  --  Time Will Tell [6.5]
%
Beckett: So the FBI doesn't have any murder in their database that match this M.O.
Castle: Which leaves us with my theory. Our victim was dabbling with black magic, and she conjured up a demon.
Beckett: Or, maybe, she ran afoul of some obscure religious sect and they sacrificed her to their pagan deity.
Castle: What are you doing?
Beckett: Making stuff up, just like you do.
Castle: Yeah, because that's my job. It's your job to follow the evidence. You're messing with the natural order of things.

  --  Get A Clue [6.6]
%
Beckett: Hear that, Castle? Our suspect is an ex-con, a felonious monk.

  --  Get A Clue [6.6]
%
[Castle and Beckett are trapped in a crypt]
Castle: This is not my idea of going to the chapel with you.

  --  Get A Clue [6.6]
%
Alexis: Bike tracks. There were bike tracks outside Kim's house. Dad, do you realise what this means?
Castle: That maybe the party Kim went to was at that farmhouse, and she saw kids doing meth.
Alexis: Well, not just doing meth. Cooking meth.
Castle: That's why she had to get out of there. That's why she told Lyle she had some decisions to make.
Alexis: She was thinking about turning them in. So when she left the party...
Castle: Maybe one of our teenage meth cookers got worried she would go to the cops.
Alexis: So he went after her.
Castle: On his bike. The tyre tracks at her house. He knew where she lived because he'd been there before.
Alexis: He was one of the other guys Kim was seeing.
Both together: We need to talk to Kim's mother.
[both look at each other in surprise.]
Castle: Now that was weird. Usually I do that with Beckett.
Alexis: [looks disgusted] Oh.

  --  Like Father, Like Daughter [6.7]
%
Beckett: Do you find it odd that Alexis has gone to everyone but me on this case?
Lanie: She hasn't gone to Perlmutter yet.
Beckett: Yeah, well, no one does, if they can help it.

  --  Like Father, Like Daughter [6.7]
%
Beckett: ...Castle and I are about to become a family, which is weird enough as it is. And he and Alexis have this whole history that has nothing to do with me. And it kind of feels like when it comes to the two of them, I'm always gonna be on the outside.
Lanie: Perfect families don't exist. It's gonna be up to you to find a way to make your baggage match their baggage. It's up to you to make your own history.

  --  Like Father, Like Daughter [6.7]
%
Kevin Ryan: I don't know about you, but I'm very comfortable in my masculinity.
Javier Esposito: You do realize you're wearing a sweater vest, right?

  --  A Murder is Forever [6.8]
%
Kevin Ryan: What can you tell us about this diamond?
Edward Peters:Well, I should like to run additional spectrometer and imaging tests on it, but, for the meantime, let me start with the four C's.
Kevin Ryan: Ah, color, cut, clarity, carat. [to Esposito] You'd know this if you ever bought an engagement ring.
Edward Peters: The diamond is colorless. No blemishes, so a pristine cut. No internal clouding and uh, nearly 100 carats.
Javier Esposito: Whew! Man! Hey, how deep would my pockets have to be to afford a rock like that?
Edward Peters: Detective, you are not tall enough to have pockets deep enough. But I would say it's worth $60 million. Conservatively.
Javier Esposito: Yeah, I ain't that tall.

  --  A Murder is Forever [6.8]
%
Rick Castle: Any luck on Alice's clients?
Kate Beckett: Yeah, a couple of possibilities. A hedge fund manager with investments in South Africa, a UN diplomat with ties to Russia, and a CEO with a manufacturing plant eighty miles from a Chinese mine.
Rick Castle: I wonder if we're looking at this wrong. What if it's not about Alice's clients, but it's actually about Alice?
Kate Beckett: What do you mean?
Rick Castle: When she was living with the gorillas in Africa, that was in Rwanda, right along the border of the Congo. A region known for conflict diamonds.
Kate Beckett: So you think she was involved in the blood diamond trade?
Rick Castle: I think it's a story that writes itself. A young primatologist in an unstable region falls for a different kind of guerilla, a warlord who is funding his bloody agenda with diamonds. He gives her one as a gift. No. No, go back. She's not that into him and she steals the diamond, having no idea its real value. She smuggles it back to the United States and finds she can't sell it without attracting too much attention, so she hides it. Until one day, a jilted and well-read warlord finds a book and sees her photo on the back. Knowing what she stole, he comes after her.
Kate Beckett: That is surprisingly plausible.
Rick Castle: I know, right? That's actually ... that would actually explain a lot. Why she was planning to disappear, why Esposito and Ryan were shot at in broad daylight. That's actually a perfect theory.

  --  A Murder is Forever [6.8]
%
Mr. Hodges: She said this new job was just what she needed.
Ryan: What do you know about this job? Where did she work?
Mr. Hodges: She wouldn't talk about it much. Except to say that it was legit, and that she was being taken care of.
Esposito: Do you know where she moved to after she left your place?
Mr. Hodges: Well, she and I shared a cab that day, and it dropped her off at a building off the West Side Highway. Well, I'll tell you this, Pam took a big step up.
[Beat; Castle and Beckett enter Pam's apartment]
Castle: [Scoffing] A big step up? This is a giant leap. This is a vault into the stratosphere.

  --  Disciple [6.9]
%
Castle: She ever get any visitors? Possible that she, uh, worked out of the home?
Hotel Worker: No, sir. That is not possible.
Beckett: Well, then who paid for the rent?
Hotel Worker: [Haughtily] Detective, we have a well-earned reputation for discretion and guarding the privacy of our clients.
Beckett: Privacy ends when murder begins. Now I want the name of whoever is paying for this unit. And if you don't have that, then go get it.
[Worker sighs and then leaves]
Castle: I love when you get angry. I mean, at other people, besides me.

  --  Disciple [6.9]
%
Dr. Kelly Nieman: No hard feelings, Detective. We're both professionals. You're just doing your job. You seek justice and I seek perfection.

  --  Disciple [6.9]
%
Castle: Can I say something that'll probably annoy you?
Beckett: [sighing] Since when do you ask for permission?
Castle: Touche.

  --  Disciple [6.9]
%
Beckett: There's not a shred of evidence that Tyson is alive, let alone involved in this.
Castle: Tyson doesn't leave evidence, not unless he wants us to find it. Like that deleted photo. No evidence, plus meticulous planning, that's vintage 3XK. And this case has it in spades.
Beckett: Castle-
Castle: And you wanna know some other 3XK classics? Using people that look like other people. Using a killer to act on his behalf. Beckett, how can you not see it?
Beckett: What I see is the guilt that you feel.
Castle: This isn't about me.
Beckett: Look, when Tyson escaped, he outsmarted all of us. But you've always blamed yourself.
Castle: [Nearly yelling] Because I'm to blame. [Calmer voice] It's him. It's Jerry Tyson.
Beckett: Don't chase ghosts, Castle, okay? It's not worth it, trust me.

  --  Disciple [6.9]
%
Jerry Matthews: You broke three of my ribs.
Castle: Oh, I'm sorry. I was going for double digits.

  --  Disciple [6.9]
%
Castle: [While holding the baby] I think Lanie is right. I think he is hungry. Um, how about you finish up here, I'll grab a uniform, and we'll just go pick up some stuff for him.
Beckett: You really want to do that?
Castle: Of course. Highly qualified. I have an RHD in childcare.
Beckett: And an RHD is...
Castle: "Ruggedly Handsome Dad."
Ryan: Ah.

  --  The Good, the Bad, and the Baby [6.10]
%
Castle: I don't know if we should just be handing him [Cosmo] over to strangers.
Beckett: Castle, we were strangers until this morning.
Castle: How can you be logical in the face of that face?

  --  The Good, the Bad, and the Baby [6.10]
%
Castle: A heist were nothing was taken... Maybe this is a classic "no honor among thieves" situation. You know, heist goes wrong, they fight.
Beckett: Where someone gets shot running away with a baby?
Castle: Not-so-classic "no honor among thieves" situation?
Beckett: No.

  --  The Good, the Bad, and the Baby [6.10]
%
Ryan: What if I'm really not ready?
Esposito: Well, you're not ready.
Ryan: What?
Esposito: Nobody is. Look, being a dad is like being a cop. Doesn't matter what they teach you in the Academy, you learn on the streets. You did okay with that, right?
Ryan: Uh, my first day, I was so nervous, I rear-ended a SWAT van and 10 guys in vests poured out, ready to take me down with extreme prejudice.

  --  The Good, the Bad, and the Baby [6.10]
%
[Alexis enters to see Castle and Beckett half asleep on the sofa and Martha nursing a baby]
Alexis: How long have I been gone?
[Martha chuckles]

  --  The Good, the Bad, and the Baby [6.10]
%
Ryan: Whoa. You two look like you got hit by the milk truck.
Castle: [Points at his face] You see this face? This is the face of your future.

  --  The Good, the Bad, and the Baby [6.10]
%
Ryan: This is Lieutenant Delia Burton. She's a fire investigator with FDNY. Detective Beckett, Mr. Castle.
Beckett: Nice to meet you. So this was arson?
Lt. Burton: Well, it's looking that way. I found miniscule traces of accelerant at the flashpoint.
Castle: So the killer set the fire to cover up the murder?
Lt. Burton: Except there's no accelerant on the body, and the fire's flashpoint is deep in the building. You know, normally when you're disposing of a body, you're gonna make sure it burns.
Beckett: So maybe our victim surprised the arsonist.
Castle: And the arsonist killed him, silencing him as a witness?
Lt. Burton:Lt. Delia Burton: That's how it looks to me. Then again, homicide's not my specialty.
Beckett: No. Uh, but fire is. Would you mind keeping me in the loop in case you find anything else?
Lt. Burton: Sure. As soon as I know what happened, so will you.
[the building creaks]
Castle: Whoa. What was that?
Lt. Burton: The building. You guys should probably go.
Castle: [turning and hurrying away] Sounds good. See ya!
Beckett: [embarrassed] I'm marrying him.

  --  Under Fire [6.11]
%
Tory: Usually, there's a file embedded in the video with data on the camera. But it's been stripped out.
Castle: Can you tell where it was first uploaded?
Tory: [typing] Let me see... Looks like the video got bounced around the Net from site to site. But this is where it started.
[Tory brings up a web paged called Pyrolicious.com]
Beckett: "Pyrolicious.com." Really?
Tory: Wow. Okay. A site that caters to fire fetishists.
Beckett: I didn't even know there was a fire festish.
Castle: The actual term is "pyrophilia." Further proof that the Internet has something for everyone.
Beckett: [whispers] I'm not gonna ask how you knew that.

  --  Under Fire [6.11]
%
[talking to Ryan, who's in the burning building, on the phone]
Jenny: Is it you? It's really you?
Ryan: Yeah. Yeah, it's me, beautiful.
Jenny: Oh, thank God. Where are you? The baby's coming.
Ryan: I'm inside.
Jenny: Inside?
Ryan: I'm sorry. I know I promised, but I'm not gonna be there.
Jenny: Don't say that. Please, don't say that.
Ryan: Sorry. I love you more than anything. Remember that. Always remember that.
Jenny: Kevin, please. No, don't leave me.
Ryan: I don't wanna.
Jenny: We need a name. For the baby. We need to do that together.
Ryan: If it's a boy, Javier.
Jenny: And if it's a girl?
Ryan: Sarah Grace, after your grandmother.
Jenny: I love you so much, Kevin. I love you.
Ryan: I love you, too.
[line is cut]
Jenny: Kevin? Kevin? Kevin?

  --  Under Fire [6.11]
%
[trapped inside a burning building, while Jenny is in labor]
Esposito: "Javier"? You're gonna name a white Irish kid "Javier"?
Ryan: What? You're gonna bust on me now for being sentimental?
Esposito: Figure it's my last chance.
[they share a laugh]
Ryan: No... No, no. We're getting out of here. There's a way out and we're gonna find it. I'm not leaving Jenny. I'm not leaving my baby without a dad.

  --  Under Fire [6.11]
%
Esposito: I don't get it. Why would the killer risk moving the body back here from the crime scene?
Castle: Sounds like a case of Weekend at Bernies's gone wrong. No. No, wait. That would have to mean there's such a thing as a Weekend at Bernie's gone right.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Beckett: So, how's Sarah Grace?
Ryan: Oh, man, I tell ya, she is just my perfect little angel. [Shows them a picture]
Beckett: Oh, she's so cute. Wow.
Esposito: Yeah.
Beckett: Is it me or, or does she look a lot like Esposito?
Esposito: Yeah, she does.
Beckett: Wow.
Ryan: Really, Beckett? I expected that from jackass, but not from you.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Castle: Now, Ted's laptop is like Fort Knox on steroids, but Tory found some unscrambled artifacts in the registry to a service set identifier.
[Beckett gives him a look]
Castle: I don't know what that means either, but she got really excited about it.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Beckett: I don't know Castle. Maybe your mom's right. I think elopement's a great idea. There's no planning, no lists. All we do is, we just get married.
Castle: Beckett, I promise you, there is a perfect date for our perfect wedding and we will find it. Trust me.
Beckett: I do.
Castle: Oh, wedding humor. Nice.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Castle: He was at an amusement park and I can tell you which one.
Lanie: How?
Castle: Well, as a connoisseur of carny food, there's only one amusement park that has both fried clams and funnel cake, and that park is...
Castle & Beckett: ...Coney Island.
Lanie: Okay, you two creep me out when you do that shared brain thing.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Castle: You don't trust me.
Jackson Hunt: Trust kills faster than bullets.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Hunt: You're getting emotional. Now's not the time.
Castle: Really? Cause it's been about forty years, so when would be a good time?

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Martha: You've stitched yourself up before, I take it?
Cross: At least this time I got a needle.
Martha: [In disbelief] Ah.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Castle [to Beckett]: I keep making the mistake of thinking that he's family. But he's not. You are.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Castle: These are communications to and from the Iranian mission.
Cross: Yep.
Beckett: That's incredibly illegal.
Cross: Yep.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Beckett: And while Castle's downloading, I'll track the signal using the Wi-Fi analyzer on my phone.
Martha: You can find a spy on your phone?
Castle: Mother, there's an app for everything now.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Martha: You know, for years I wondered if your father was the one who got away. Well, now, I finally know.
Castle: He was never worth your time.
Martha: Oh, yes, he was. First time I met him, he gave me the greatest gift of my life. You. And now after all these years, he's given me another one. Closure. So what about you, kiddo? How are you?
Castle: I don't know.
Martha: Think we'll ever see him again?
Castle: I wish I knew.

  --  Deep Cover [6.12]
%
Alexis: Look, I'm sorry about that whole "hot mess" thing I said before.
Mandy: Sorry that you said it, or sorry that I heard it?
Alexis: I should probably go.
Mandy: It happens when you're not looking.
Alexis: Excuse me?
Mandy: Before you asked how it happens how someone becomes like me. It happens when you're not looking, and by the time you realize it, it's already who you are. Like the car crash on the side of the road everybody stops and and watches.
Alexis: That doesn't mean it's who you have to be. You can always change.
Mandy: Turns out I don't do change so well. But you steal a police car, and you set it on fire, I'm your girl. Or if you find the greatest guy in the world, fall madly in love, and then mess it up by hooking up with my dirtbag ex? That I can do.
Alexis: Yeah, I Saw that picture online.
Mandy: You and the rest of the world.
Alexis: Maybe if you didn't drink.
Mandy: If I don't drink, then I start to feel. And I don't like what I feel. I wish I had those glasses from "Mandy Melody", I'd just put 'em on and Just disappear.
Alexis: I know how you feel.
Mandy: How could you possibly know how I feel?
Alexis: Because right now, I Wish I could disappear from my life, too.

  --  Limelight [6.13]
%
Alexis: [ranting] The thing about my boyfriend is, I thought I was being so grown-up. Moving in with him, getting my own place, but now, it's my whole life. And I'm pretty sure I've made a huge mistake. Do you know why I'm helping him with his grant application? Because if he get it, he'll have to travel.
Mandy: That is messed up. You need to tell him.
Alexis: Tell him what? That I changed my mind? I don't want a relationship? We have a lease!
Mandy: That's romantic.
Alexis: And he doesn't deserve it. He hasn't done anything wrong. It-Oh! And then there's my dad. What do I tell him, huh? That he was right all along? That I wasn't ready? [Gives a forced laugh]
Mandy: [sighing] I wish I would've said that. I wasn't ready for soooo many things.
Alexis: Do you ever look back on something you've done, and it's like someone else is doing it?
Mandy: You're kidding, right?
Alexis: Right. [sighs] Sorry, I...haven't had anyone to talk to.
Mandy: Clearly

  --  Limelight [6.13]
%
Esposito: Hey Castle, looks like your lovelife made the paper again...
Castle: Ah, what? Alright, alright, who am I gonna hook up with now?
Ryan: [Reading an article in the paper] Novelist Richard Castle and New York Police detective Katherine Beckett, both native New Yorkers, are pleased to announce their engagement.
Castle: No, nah, nonononono, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't do this...
Beckett: [Coming forward] Actually, I did.
Castle: I thought you...
Beckett: I know Castle, I like my privacy, but I do realize that you're somewhat famous...
Castle: [Indignantly] Somewhat?
[Ryan and Esposito make the "little" gesture]
Beckett: Yes, and if we're gonna be together, I have to come to terms with that. And if they're gonna write about you, I want it to be the truth, I want it to be about us. [Hugging Castle]
Castle: Well, there's no one that... [Esposito and Ryan grinning in the background, waiting for Castle and Beckett to kiss, Castle giving them the looks, they turn away] There's no one I'd rather share a headline with, but just for the interest of accuracy, let's see if we are getting married in space?
Beckett: No, it's not gonna happen babe...
Castle: [looking disappointed] Be pretty fun, space...

  --  Limelight [6.13]
%
Castle: Mother, what are you trying to force on my lovely fiancee?
Martha: No, no, no, no, no. I am just trying to  expose Katherine to the glorious world of wedding magazines.
Beckett: They are all very girly, with a lot of gauzy photos of love-struck brides looking off into the distance.
Castle: Perhaps they're contemplating the 50% divorce rate.

  --  Dressed to Kill [6.14]
%
Esposito: Just Yumi. I guess if you don't have a last name you can charge more.

  --  Dressed to Kill [6.14]
%
Beckett: Do you regret it? That prank, missing your prom, not being here with Audra Dobson?
Castle: Not even a little bit. Everything I've ever done, every choice I've ever made, every terrible and wonderful thing that's ever happened to me, has all led me to right here, this moment, with you.

  --  Smells Like Teen Spirit [6.15]
%
Principal Duncan: Just one thing I need to know, Mr. Castle. It's haunted me for years: where did you get the cow?
Castle: Put it this way sir, if you ever need one, I know a guy.

  --  Smells Like Teen Spirit [6.15]
%
Castle: She was thrown against the ceiling? That is a superhuman feat, bordering on physically impossible.
Becket: Okay, Castle, let's hear it. What's your outlandish theory?
Castle: Isn't it obvious? Madison made the Hulk angry.

  --  Smells Like Teen Spirit [6.15]
%
Ryan: ...but I did find out about our victim through his personal website.
Beckett: He's got his own website?
Ryan: Yeah, he's an actor. A struggling one, judging by his credits.
Castle: Justin Marquette is "a member of the Roster Theater Company" and is "currently appearing in their off-off-off-Broadway production of Checkhov's Platonov." That's a lot of "offs."

  --  Room 147 [6.16]
%
[As the group is still in confusion about the case]
Esposito: [To Castle] Alright. Come on.
Castle: Hmm?
Esposito: Give us one of your theories, bro. Come on. Whatever it is, it can't be any crazier than what we're already dealing with.
Castle: Okay. I think...I'm man enough to admit I'm completely theory-less.

  --  Room 147 [6.16]
%
Castle: What if their lives intersect, just not in such a literal sense?
Beckett: Castle, no, please. If this is some alternate universe theory, I'm not in the mood.
Castle: Really. Alternate universe, that's how little you think of me.
Beckett: I'm sorry. I... I'm sorry, I just, I thought that...
Castle: No, they're psychically linked, and not just to each other, but to the actual killer. See, they've seen the crime through his or her eyes, and the experience is so visceral that both Sam and Anita think that they committed the crime themselves.
Beckett: [giggles] I'm sorry, it's just you got excited, it's kind of cute.
Castle: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know how I like the weird stuff.

  --  Room 147 [6.16]
%
Beckett: Tell me what this is all about.
Castle: Not until I know I'm right. Which... I am. You should know, you're engaged to a genius.
Beckett: Yes, a genius at annoying me.
Castle: So, I'm Justin, and you are one of these several people who shot me.
Beckett: I'm starting to feel the urge

  --  Room 147 [6.16]
%
Beckett: If I have to hear that confession one more time, I'm gonna shoot somebody.

  --  Room 147 [6.16]
%
Beckett: [Whispering] This is Detective Kate Beckett, and if you can hear me, I've been abducted. I'm in a white cube van, New York plates. We've been traveling for about 20 minutes. We've been making a lot of turns, but I think we're headed east. Captain Fowler, if you can hear me, this is seriously ruining my dinner plans.

  --  In the Belly of the Beast [6.17]
%
Castle: See what happens when I leave you alone?
Beckett: Babe, I wasn't alone. When they were interrogating me, the only thing that kept me going was thinking about you, about our future, the wedding. You were with me the whole time.

  --  In the Belly of the Beast [6.17]
%
Castle: It looks like she was stabbed with a knife.
Perlmutter: To the untrained eye, perhaps, but what you don't know about post-mortem analysis could fill a book, Mr. Castle. In fact, it has. Numerous times.
Castle: Fine. So, it was not a knife.
Pearlmutter: Ah, wrong again. It was a knife, but "stabbed" implies the blade was thrust into the victim, whereas this wound was produced by it being hurled into her chest.
Beckett: What is this, Last of the Mohicans?

  --  The Way of the Ninja [6.18]
%
Castle: I was about to make that phone call, and that's when the ninjas attacked!
Beckett: You've got an excuse for everything, don't you?

  --  The Way of the Ninja [6.18]
%
Kate Beckett: Castle, I love you, but I will not marry you on a ride, or up in space, or on a slide.

  --  The Greater Good [6.19]
%
Kate Beckett: Sir, uh, you okay?
Victoria Gates: Oh, just trying to figure out how to tell my sister her case is compromised without her blaming me.
Kate Beckett: Why would she blame you when you're just doing your job?
Victoria Gates: There's a history. 1998. I had just been made head of Internal Affairs. Elizabeth was in the D.A.'s Office. We called ourselves "The Dynamic Duo." At the time, Elizabeth was closing in on a heroin ring in East New York and they had an undercover inside. His testimony was key to the case, but...
Kate Beckett: He was dirty?
Victoria Gates: He'd skimmed a few eight balls off the very bust Elizabeth was building her case around. And when my office caught him reselling it, she came to me, begged me not to file charges. Asked me to think of the greater good. I did my job that day, too. Hasn't been the same between us since.

  --  The Greater Good [6.19]
%
Yvonne: Just turn off your cellphones, pretend like it's 40 years ago and you shouldn't have any problems. [breathes deep] Actually, you [pointing at Beckett] will have a problem...

  --  That '70s Show [6.20]
%
Leone: [About Beckett] I mean, have you ever seen a cop with an ass that fine? If this does women's lib, I'm all for it!
Beckett: [indignantly] Excuse me?!?
Castle: To be fair, you do have a very fine ... nevermind ...

  --  That '70s Show [6.20]
%
Ryan: [after watching the "documentary" about police work in the '70s] So, good old days of police brutality...

  --  That '70s Show [6.20]
%
Leone: Come on baby, once you go white, nothing else seems right!
Lanie: Iiiii'd rather be dead than end up in your bed

  --  That '70s Show [6.20]
%
Beckett: [addressed to Leone] Stop talkin', start walkin'!

  --  That '70s Show [6.20]
%
Alexis: Oh, my gosh. Did you really beat Dad at Scrabble?
Castle: I concede nothing. Except that I need more coffee.
Martha: That is quite an accomplishment, young lady. Nobody beats him, ever.
Beckett: Oh, yeah. He's mentioned that. Repeatedly.
Martha: Ah, how the mighty have fallen. [Pours him coffee]
Castle: "Richard Castle. One word short." I cannot allow this to be my epitaph.
[Alexis and Beckett fist-bump as he drinks.]
Castle: I saw that.

  --  Law & Boarder [6.21]
%
Beckett: Whoa! Nice tail whip!
Castle: Oh, so you know the lingo. Any extreme sports in your history I've yet to hear about?
Beckett: Well, I think catching killers is pretty extreme. And then there's marrying you.
Castle: Ah, yes. I admit I am extreme. Extremely handsome.
Beckett: Yeah. With a high degree of difficulty.

  --  Law & Boarder [6.21]
%
Beckett: Castle, aren't there more important things than winning?
Castle: Oh, that's a notion created to comfort those who lose.

  --  Law & Boarder [6.21]
%
[Castle putting up a Scrabble board]
Beckett: Hey! So, uhm, where's your mom?
Castle: Ah, she and Alexis went to dinner and a midnight sing-a-long with Grease, why?
Beckett: Cause, I'm ready for a rematch! [Tossing the stones from the table]
Castle: Why did you do that?
Beckett: New game: Poker!
Castle: You wanna play Poker against me?
Beckett: Strip Poker!
Castle: I'll deal! [Later, clothes laying on the couch] Your bet!
Beckett: I think I'm gonna go All In!
Castle: Me too! But, all I have left for bet with is this shirt.
Beckett: I'll take that bet - what have you got?
Castle: Who cares? [Both throw away the cards and start kissing] This is so much better than Scrabble!
Beckett: Yeah...

  --  Law & Boarder [6.21]
%
Kate Beckett: You killed Jason Marks and the blood in the car is gonna prove it!
Vulcan Simmons: Well, then that's a good thing you have a warrant - You do have a warrant, don't you Detective? [Beckett not answering] Aww, I see, that's a shame, because now all that evidence has become fruit of the poisoned tree. My lawyers and I thank you!

  --  Veritas [6.22]
%
Kate Beckett: We've got to take the fight to Bracken.
Rick Castle: By looking for a mythical tape that no one can find? No, Smith was right. Once we change your look, we get out of town.
Kate Beckett: You know, Castle, my mom had a saying. Vincit omnia veritas.
Rick Castle: "Truth conquers all."
Kate Beckett: We'll never find the truth if we run away.
Rick Castle: Kate, we're never gonna find the truth if we're dead. We're not running away. We are surviving, okay? We're living to fight another day.

  --  Veritas [6.22]
%
Roy Montgomery: Pulgati knows he's been framed. What if someone gets onto this?
William Bracken: Then I'll handle them.
Roy Montgomery: You? How?
William Bracken: I know people, Roy. Dangerous people. Anyone gets too close, like that bitch lawyer Johanna Beckett who's been poking around, I'll have them killed. I've had people killed before.

  --  Veritas [6.22]
%
Kate Beckett: [confronting Bracken during a television interview] I found the tape. I found it. It's over. Senator Bracken, you are under arrest for conspiracy, fraud, and the murder of my mother, Johanna Beckett.

  --  Veritas [6.22]
%
Gates: You're about to experience one of the most important days of your life. I'm so happy for you, Detective.
Castle: Hey, guys!
Gates: In spite of who you're marrying.

  --  For Better or For Worse [6.23]
%
Beckett [in tears]: Castle, I'm married to someone else and I have no idea where he is, we don't have any leads, and to make things worse, the venue, and now this. I mean it just feels like all of this is one big sign.
Castle: Well, maybe it is a sign. A sign that ours is a great love story. What's a great love story without obstacles to overcome? Every fairy tale has them, terrible trials that only the worthy can transcend. But, you can't give up. That's the deal. We want the happy ending, we can't give up.
Beckett [smiling]: And that's why I want to marry you.

  --  For Better or For Worse [6.23]
%
Beckett: I can't believe you gave him the money from Pastor Bob.
Castle: I'm a sucker for happy endings. Now let's get the hell out of this town and go get our own.
Beckett: Yes! We're getting married!

  --  For Better or For Worse [6.23]
%
Martha: Only women of substance have worn these gems. They've been waiting, Katherine, for you.

  --  For Better or For Worse [6.23]
%
Vinny: Okay, listen. On occasion, clients might need to make a vehicle disappear, and for ten grand, such a thing can be handled.
Beckett: What was the name of the client?
Vinny: No names came up. He called me in the morning, he said the right things, we struck a deal, but I never met the man. It was all anonymous.
Ryan: Then how did you get paid?
Vinny: We used a drop. The client left a bag full of cash in a dumpster on the lower East side right after the SUV got turned into a panini.
Ryan: After? What happens if you crush a car and then you don't get your money?
Vinnie: (chuckles) That does not happen.

  --  Driven [7.1]
%
Beckett: I will find Castle, with or without the FBI.
Connors: You're assuming he wants to be found.

  --  Driven [7.1]
%
Esposito: Kate?
Beckett: I'm fine. I just never thought I'd see him again.

  --  Driven [7.1]
%
Castle: We can't just, um, pick up where we left off, can we, as if nothing ever happened?
Beckett: No.
Castle: We'll get there. We'll find our way home.

  --  Driven [7.1]
%
Castle: You saw that interview. No-one believes me. But somewhere out there, someone knows where I was, and what I was doing.
Beckett: You ready for this?
Castle: A mystery I might be able to solve? It'll be a relief.

  --  Montreal [7.2]
%
Beckett: And instead of going after real leads, we're gonna be chasing thousands of half-baked tipsters playing the Richard Castle lottery.
Castle: What real leads? So far, we've had nothing but dead ends. And I'm tired of not knowing. Now, to find a needle in a haystack, do we not first need a haystack?
Beckett: Yeah, but not a haystack full of nutjobs.

  --  Montreal [7.2]
%
Gates: Mr Castle! Just what in the hell do you think you're doing?
Beckett: Did you give that TV station the precinct number?
Castle: Well, I'm not going to give them my home phone. That's private!
Gates: The NYPD is not your personal secretary! Do you know how many man-hours this little stunt of yours is costing us? The phones have been ringing off the hook!
Castle: Did you hear that? Ringing off the hook? [kisses Gates and grabs a stack of phone messages] We have leads.
Gates: W... w... what just happened?

  --  Montreal [7.2]
%
Martha: Aha, that will be my date.
Castle: Ooh, you have a date?
Martha: Uh-huh, Robert. We met at the grief counselling group, when you were presumed...
Castle: You picked up a man at grief counselling?
Martha: Yes. Now, I will thank you to go into the other room.
Castle: Why?
Martha: Because at the moment our relationship is based on mutual loss, and if he finds out that you have returned, and are alive, it will just... it will ruin everything.
Castle: Mother, you realise I was on television this morning?
Martha: Luckily, Robert is a cultured man, he does not watch television. The only newspaper he reads is the Wall Street Journal, which, thankfully, did not carry news of your return. So, go, go, go, go.

  --  Montreal [7.2]
%
Beckett: We have no idea what's out there. No idea who's out there. That's too risky.
Castle: It's Canada. How risky could it be? And need I remind you, I'm a grown man. I have no need to ask your permission. That being said, pleeeease, please, please can I go?
Beckett: Okay, fine. But only because I know you're not gonna do anything stupid if she's with you. [to Alexis] Don't let him do anything stupid.
Alexis: Promise.
Castle: Grab your passport, I'll get the tickets.

  --  Montreal [7.2]
%
Jenkins: You weren't supposed to come back. Ever.
Castle: It's you.
Jenkins: What do you remember?
Castle: Nothing.
Jenkins: That's good.
Castle: I know you're involved. I know you know what happened to me. Who are you?
Jenkins: You can't be doing this. Asking questions, offering rewards. It's too dangerous.
Castle: Then tell me what happened.
Jenkins: You're not listening, Mr. Castle. You need to stop.
Castle: Or what?
Jenkins: Or you're going to find out the truth. And you said you didn't want to remember. We went to great lengths to make sure that you didn't. But if you keep looking...
Castle: There's no way in hell I asked for this.
Jenkins: I'm sorry, but you did.
Castle: I don't believe you.
Jenkins: Hollander's woods, Mr. Castle. That February day, when you were eleven years old. What happened to you there, the real reason you became a mystery writer.
Castle: How did you... I never told anyone about that.
Jenkins: No. Not Beckett, not your family. But you told me, three weeks ago, so that if this ever happened, you'd have proof. You'd know that you were the one who asked to forget.
Castle: I asked for this?
Jenkins: Some mysteries aren't meant to be solved. It's over now. Go home. Live your life. Forget this ever happened. It's what you wanted.

  --  Montreal [7.2]
%
[Castle and Beckett glance at each other over their tablets]
Beckett: You want to do something tonight?
Castle: Sure, if you want.
Beckett: Sure.
Castle: Like what?
Beckett: We could, um, go watch a movie.
Castle: Yeah, yeah, if you want to.
Beckett: Well, not if you don't want to.
Castle: Well if you want to, I - I want to.
Beckett: You know what, we've watched a lot of movies over the last couple of weeks.
Castle: Yeah.
Beckett: So maybe we could, you know, if you wanted...
Castle: If I wanted to what?
Beckett: I mean, we could try something else tonight.
Castle: Something else as in...
Beckett: Yeah. I mean, we haven't since...
Castle: Yeah, well, given everything that's happened, I thought you just, you weren't ready...
Beckett: I thought that you weren't ready.
Castle: I'm ready. I'm... I... [scoffs] I'm... I'm so ready.
Beckett: I'm ready too. Like, I'm really ready.
Castle: Okay, well, then, what are we waiting for?
[Beckett's cellphone rings]

  --  Clear and Present Danger [7.3]
%
Castle: I so missed these mind melds.

  --  Clear and Present Danger [7.3]
%
Castle: You promise?
Beckett: Yes, we'll pick up where we left off. I'll even slip into that Valentine's Day gift you got me.
Castle: You mean the one with...?
Beckett: Mmm hmm.
Castle: With...?
Beckett: Yep.
[Beckett walks into the crime scene and Castle leans heavily on the cop outside the door with a heavy exhalation.]

  --  Clear and Present Danger [7.3]
%
Beckett: Really? That's how the Devil is gonna kill someone? Using a broken pool stick?
Castle: Or perhaps the Prince of Darkness is trying to make a point. You live by the cue, you die by the cue.
Beckett: I thought he usually just released the hellhounds.
Castle: All right, then how do you explain what we just saw back there?
Beckett: Easy. Will didn't close the door all the way when he came back in. Our window was open, the killer came through it, and this huge gust of wind forced the door open,  and then shut when they left.
Castle: Except Will lives on the 19th floor. With no fire escape.
Beckett: Come on, Castle. You know that there are plenty of ways to access windows on high-level floors without a fire escape.
Castle: Yes. If you're Spider-Man.
Beckett: Our killer's not Spider-Man.
Castle: Agreed. Because it's the Devil.

  --  Clear and Present Danger [7.3]
%
Beckett: What would you do if you were attacked by an invisible, demonic force?
Castle: I'd tell Ryan to lay off the bean burritos at lunch

  --  Clear and Present Danger [7.3]
%
Beckett: Give me a minute, and let me slip into something special, okay?
Castle: Right.
[as Beckett leaves, Castle hurries to the bed]
Castle: Cause there's something special I got you for Valentine's Day. I approve.
Beckett: It's even better.
[re-enters the room naked]
Beckett: It's invisible.

  --  Clear and Present Danger [7.3]
%
Jason: I'm not talking to Mr Castle. He's a jerkface.
Castle: [To Kate.] Okay, you know what, he's the jerkface.
Beckett: He's eight years old. You've been here a day and a half, and already you have a nemesis?

  --  Child's Play [7.4]
%
Emily: [Looks quizzically at Beckett] I'm Emily. Who are you?
Beckett: I'm Kate. I'm Mr. Castle's... friend.
Emily: Do you like to play Princess with him?
Beckett: Er... sometimes.
Emily: Are you two getting married?
Beckett and Castle together: One day.
[Emily walks out looking disappointed]

  --  Child's Play [7.4]
%
Leslie Ruiz: ...Maybe you should give this medal to her [Natalie]. I didn't do much to deserve it.
Beckett: Are you kidding? You put up with Castle for two whole days.

  --  Child's Play [7.4]
%
Castle: I realize you consider yourself the adult of the family...
Alexis: For good reason.
Castle: For very good reason. But... but part of being an adult is realizing you can't always protect the people you love.
Alexis: Okay.
Castle: Okay.
Alexis: Being an adult really sucks.
Castle: Yeah. And you've spent way too much time having to be one. So... [steps out and comes back in with a scooter] I'm ordering you to be a kid.
Alexis: Don't you think I'm a little old for that?
Castle: I am not too old for it, so you are definitely not too old for it.

  --  Child's Play [7.4]
%
Beckett: You think that you've won? You haven't. Everyone else has.
Adam: What do you mean, everyone else?
Beckett: Everyone who ever bullied you, who ever hurt you, belittled you, who ever thought you were weak and worthless and small. And you know what, Adam? They were right.
Adam: No they weren't. I am not any of those things.
Beckett: You're all of them, and worse.
Adam: [voice rising] I am what people made me.
Beckett: You were born this way, or your mummy made you. But Tim Witherspoon, and the rest of the kids at that school, they didn't break you. You were already broken. They only sensed what you were, and what you were about to become. So you know what? In a way, their bullying wasn't enough.
Adam: [close to tears] How can you say that? I'm the victim here.
Beckett: And you're always gonna be a victim. You think that hiding behind a username and killing is going to change that? That won't get you respect. You're always gonna be the same pathetic loser that...
Adam: [shouting] I am not a loser!
Beckett: And when you abducted Kent and Warren, I bet the two of them looked at each other and thought, "Are we being punked here?"
Adam: Believe me, they didn't.
Beckett: They think it's a joke.
Adam: They're afraid, they're - they're terrified by...
Beckett: They're sharing a laugh right now about you.
Adam: They are not laughing!
Castle: She just got him to say that they're together.
Beckett: They're laughing. They're laughing right now.
Adam: Well, not for long. That clock will count down to zero, and their screams will echo off the tiled walls as they take in their last breath of stale air, and then they'll both fry.
Garrett: Tiled walls and stale air? That was how he talked about the locker room at his school.
Castle: Where Witherspoon put him on the video. He's bringing this thing full circle! What was the name of that high school?
Garrett: Harding High. But they moved to a new campus. The original building is shut down.
Castle: [Hammers on screen] Beckett!

  --  Meme is Murder [7.5]
%
Castle: It's like It's A Wonderful Life. Every time your phone rings, a victim gets their wings.

  --  Time of Our Lives [7.6]
%
Beckett: I called your mother. She refused to come and get you.
Castle: Oh. Well, she always did believe in tough love.
Beckett: That doesn't seem to have worked out in your case.

  --  Time of Our Lives [7.6]
%
Castle: You know, I keep trying to figure it out. How do you live with the man who's lost two months of his life and left you at the altar? How do I live with... the pain I know I've caused you? How do we get past this?
Beckett: I wish I knew.
Castle: I think I have the answer. We just do. So, Katherine Beckett, will you marry me?
Beckett [puzzled smile]: I've already said yes.
Castle: Will you marry me right now?
[Beckett's face lights up with joy.]

  --  Time of Our Lives [7.6]
%
Beckett: The moment that I met you, my life became extraordinary. You taught me to be my best self, to look forward to tomorrow's adventures, and when I was vulnerable you were strong. I love you, Richard Castle, and I want to live my life in the warmth of your smile and the strength of your embrace. I promise you I will love you. I will be your friend and your partner in crime and in life. Always.
Castle: The moment we met, my life became extraordinary. You taught me more about myself than I knew there was to learn. You are the joy in my heart. You are the last person I want to see every night before I close my eyes. I love you, Katherine Beckett, and the mystery of you is the one I want to spend the rest of my life exploring. I promise to love you, to be your friend and your partner in crime and life till death do us part, and for the time of our lives.

  --  Time of Our Lives [7.6]
%
Lanie: I am your maid of honor. I haven't had a carb in months just in case I had to put that damn dress back on.
Beckett: And you look great.
Lanie: Kate, save the flattery. You owe me dinner. I'm picking the restaurant and we're ordering all the desserts.

  --  Once Upon a Time in the West [7.7]
%
Gates: I'm sorry. Without the sheriff's cooperation, there's only so much we can do.
Beckett: So, we're just gonna let him get away with this?
Esposito: Kind of like how we let you get away with not inviting us to the wedding?
Gates: Well, at least you were invited to the champagne toast.
Beckett: Sorry, sir.
Gates: Oh, no, no, no. I'm sure it was Mr. Castle's fault.

  --  Once Upon a Time in the West [7.7]
%
Castle: I don't know if it comes with the room, but there's a naked cowboy shaving in our bathroom.

  --  Once Upon a Time in the West [7.7]
%
Castle: We gotta find this guy.
Beckett: But how? We're under cover. I can't just flash my badge and get people to talk.
Castle: Exactly. Which is why we don't approach this like cops. We approach this like writers.
Beckett: So we procrastinate and make stuff up?

  --  Once Upon a Time in the West [7.7]
%
Castle: But if Whitney was searching for the gold and the killer tracked her, there could be clues.
Beckett: You keep assuming that the gold's still out there. Don't forget, Clyde and Dutch were looking for it. They might have found it.
Castle: Not if they didn't have those old maps that Whitney had.
Beckett: You just wanna go after the gold.
Castle: Of course I wanna go after the gold! It's gold!

  --  Once Upon a Time in the West [7.7]
%
Gates: I think the two of you should stop whining like two little schoolgirls who weren't invited to the dance and be happy that your friends, your very dear friends, have found a way to make it work. Especially after all the hell those two have been through.

  --  Once Upon a Time in the West [7.7]
%
[Beckett lassoes Castle]
Beckett: [in a Western drawl] Hey there, cowboy. Where you off to in such a hurry?
Castle: Beckett, what are you doing? We're gonna miss our flight. You got to be in the office in the morning.
Beckett: No, I don't.
Castle: Yes, you do. You don't have any personal days left.
Beckett: Actually, I kinda do. For their wedding gift, Ryan and Esposito have both agreed to give me two of their vacation days each.
Castle: They did?
Beckett: Yeah. [Reeling Castle in] So now we have four days to do whatever... we... want.
Castle: And you want to stay here?
Beckett:[back to her normal voice] Of course I do. After all, this is our honeymoon. [They kiss]
Beckett: Oh, wait. We're gonna still go to that island getaway, right?
Castle: Yes, absolutely.
Beckett: Okay, right. [They kiss again as the end credits roll]

  --  Once Upon a Time in the West [7.7]
%
Castle: This feels different, doesn't it?
Beckett: What does?
Castle: Rolling up to a crime scene as a married couple. Like Nick and Nora Charles.
Beckett: Ooh, like MacMillan and wife.
Castle: Hart to Hart.
Beckett:Turner and Hooch.
Castle: Turner and Hooch aren't even married.
Beckett: Yeah, but you still remind me a little of Hooch.

  --  Kill Switch [7.8]
%
Esposito: You have to turn back, Jared, because if you don't, here's what's going to happen. HRT, that's the Hostage Rescue Team, they're going to wait for you to get weak and tired, then a dozen highly trained guys armed to the teeth will breach this car, and trust me when I tell you they will not play.

  --  Kill Switch [7.8]
%
Marisa Haragon: What's your play?
Esposito: Talk to him. Try to get him to see the light. Then disarm him if I get the chance.
Marisa: I should talk to him. I'm wearing the Kevlar.
Esposito: Yeah, but I've already got a rapport with the guy, so...
Marisa: A bad rapport. I know what this is. I'm just a transit cop. You gold-shield guys are always acting like you're better than us.
Esposito: We are better than you.
[Later, after the hostage situation]
Esposito: You did all right down there. I don't care what they say about transit cops.
Marisa: Mmm. What they say about gold shields is even worse. Mostly 'cause it's true.

  --  Kill Switch [7.8]
%
Stone: You're not the priest.
Beckett: No, but I can take your confession.

  --  Kill Switch [7.8]
%
Castle: I was raised by a single mother. Hard Kill was how I got my bro time.
Ryan: That explains so much.

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
Castle: So Lance reaches out to another ex-agent, and he's killed with a garrote? Mark my words, this case is gonna lead us into a labyrinthian world of deceit, villainy and international espionage. This is better than one of his movies.
Beckett: After what I saw, it'd have to be.

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
Ryan: You know, maybe that's what I need. A catchphrase. [With a gravel voice] "Time to mete out justice." "Time for prison time."
Esposito: Yeah, you keep working on that, bro.
Ryan: "Time to pay the bill for doing the kill."
Esposito: Okay, on second thought, don't.

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
[As Kat Kingsley waits in the interrogation room]
Castle: Would it be weird if I asked her to sign this? [Unwraps a poster of her]
Ryan: When? On her way to jail?
Castle: It would mean so much to me.

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
Ryan: You know what time it is? It's Ryan time.
Esposito: Please just stop.
Ryan: My name's Ryan and I hate lyin'.

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
Castle: He's a nordic bodybuilder, card-carrying member of Mensa.
Beckett: I don't know, Castle. Maybe I just like the old-school guys, you know? Like Eastwood, Bronson, McQueen...

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
Beckett: Castle, you really think I could stand between you and your boyhood dream?
Castle: You are my boyhood dream.
Beckett: Awwww!
Castle: Well, you and drinking with the Indestructibles.
Beckett: You don't always have to keep talking.
Castle: Right.

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
[As Castle and the Indestructibles flee the night club]
Castle: I'm starring in my own action movie. This is the best night ever!

  --  Last Action Hero [7.9]
%
Beckett: It's just that rhyming isn't exactly my thing.
Castle: This coming from the woman who skipped prom to crash a poetry slam.
Beckett: Spoken word, Castle. That's a totally different jam. I mean, I could write a haiku for you instead.
Castle: No, that's against the rules.
Beckett: Since when do you follow rules?
Castle: Since I'm the one who made them.

  --  Bad Santa [7.10]
%
Dino Scarpella: She [his daughter] and Eric, they were very close, very close - since they were kids.
Castle: So you're admitting he was your doctor...?
Dino Scarpella: I don't like that word "admit"
Castle: [looking sheepishly] Acknowledging?

  --  Bad Santa [7.10]
%
Dino Scarpella: I need to find out who did this to him
Castle: Don't take this the wrong way, Dino, but I think you already do know...
Dino Scarpella: It was not Christopher!
Castle: All the evidence says that it was.
Dino Scarpella: He was framed, he's innocent, when it comes to this anyway. I know, because I was with him.
Castle: Dino, if that's true, all you need is to call Beckett. You can alibi him.
Dino Scarpella: Hmm, no, that's no good. See, at the time, me and Christopher, we were, uhm, engaged in a sensitive business transaction....
Castle: ...And by "sensitive" you mean "illegal"...
Dino Scarpella: I don't like that word either...

  --  Bad Santa [7.10]
%
Dino Scarpella: I could crack a joke about making you an offer you can't refuse... But you cannot refuse

  --  Bad Santa [7.10]
%
Castle: ...I do have something special lined up. A surprise, actually, for you.
Beckett: Really? What kind of a surprise?
Castle: Well, now if I told you that, it would be a surprise. But trust me, you're gonna love it.
Beckett: Okay, now, why does that scare me?
Martha: Because you're smart.

  --  Castle, P.I. [7.11]
%
Beckett: We're married. [holds up her wedding ring] Married people tell each other things.

  --  Castle, P.I. [7.11]
%
Castle: Did I tell you that I got pepper sprayed today?
Alexis: You say that like it's a good thing.

  --  Castle, P.I. [7.11]
%
Esposito: There is no way he's ahead of us on this [case].
Ryan: Hey, he got to the morgue before us, and that lawyer.
Beckett: Ryan, he is resourceful, but he is not that resourceful.
Ryan: He got you to marry him, didn't he?

  --  Castle, P.I. [7.11]
%
Castle: What happened to that rebellious girl with the motorcycle and the leather jacket? Would she say can't?
Beckett: She enforces the law now, and drinks expensive wine.

  --  Castle, P.I. [7.11]
%
Beckett: Ready to get out of here? Call it a night?
Castle: Whoa, what's the rush, doll? Why don't you stick around a while, give those stems of yours a rest?
Beckett: Could of. I'm all alone, and this is my first time in the big, scary city.
Castle: Spare me the tell-tale, precious. A dame like you, you got an angle.
Beckett: You're pretty quick for a gumshoe.
Castle: Come on, spill the story. Time is money, and I got none of either.
Beckett: All right, I'll give it to you straight. I'm just a girl, looking for a private dick.
Castle: Whoah! Then your search is over, sweetheart.

  --  Private Eye Caramba [7.12]
%
Beckett: So, how does it feel to have your first satisfied customer?
Castle: I want to satisfy another one.
Beckett: Oh, I think that can be arranged.
Castle: As the sun set on the mean streets of the naked city, I could feel my luck was about to change. The killer was caught, my case was closed, and hanging on my arm was the dame of my dreams.
Beckett: [sighs] Are you going to be doing that all night?
Castle: Not if it hurts my chances.

  --  Private Eye Caramba [7.12]
%
Beckett: Castle, stop chasing the mice in your head.
Castle: What if they're leading me to the truth?

  --  I, Witness [7.13]
%
Alexis: Bye Kate. [kisses Beckett on the cheek]
Beckett: Oh! Bye bye.
Castle: A goodbye kiss? When did that start?
Beckett: Just now. Yeah, no, I'm as surprised as you are.
Castle: I don't know that I'm surprised. I mean, you are pretty lovable.
Beckett: Well, you raised a great person, so...
Castle: Mmm. You say that now, you weren't here for the beginning.
Beckett: Next time I will be.

  --  Resurrection [7.14]
%
Castle: I never thought this day would come. Not only can we prove Tyson is alive, but we have him in custody.
Beckett: What we don't have is a smoking gun.

  --  Resurrection [7.14]
%
Nieman: Please don't scream. It's tiresome. And no-one can hear you.

  --  Reckoning [7.15]
%
Gates: You know, when I first got here, I couldn't figure out what Beckett saw in you. But you know what she said? "He sees the story. I see the evidence, where it leads, but he sees the story." That man got inside your head, and you let him. You wanna help her, you gotta get inside his. What's his story? What's his next move gonna be? Now you figure that out, and we'll find her.

  --  Reckoning [7.15]
%
Marcus: ...And I am stuck here for life without the possibility of parole. So what the hell do you think you could give me that would be worth a damn?
Castle: Revenge.

  --  Reckoning [7.15]
%
Castle: This isn't about me, is it? No, it's about so much more than that. This is about you, your inadequacy. All the games, all the manipulation. After I screwed up your plans, you needed to prove you were smarter than me. You needed to know you could control me.
Tyson: [Shrugs] Well, you're here.
Castle: You know, I've written characters like you. Cunning psychopaths so narcissistic they believe they can't be caught because they're smarter than everyone, and they need to prove it. That's your story, Jerry. Why you did everything. You needed to prove it. So I let you.
Tyson: What do you mean?
Castle: I let you bring me here. It was the only way to find you. I needed to find you so I could find her. But the truth, Jerry... the truth is, I lured you here, to watch you die. [In a deeper voice] Are we clear?
Tyson: Clear about what?
Castle: Then take the shot.

  --  Reckoning [7.15]
%
Beckett: Every time I close my eyes, I see her face.
Castle: I see his too, since that night on the bridge. You know how I deal with it?
Beckett: No.
Castle: I open my eyes and look at you.
Beckett: [smiles] Thanks for coming to get me.
Castle: Always.

  --  Reckoning [7.15]
%
Ryan: Hey Castles.

  --  The Wrong Stuff [7.16]
%
[After finding out he's going into the Mars simulation in space suits]
Castle: Best case ever!

  --  The Wrong Stuff [7.16]
%
Castle: One small murder for man. One giant mystery for mankind.

  --  The Wrong Stuff [7.16]
%
Beckett: Castle, boost me up
Castle: Why am I always on the bottom?
[Beckett gives Castle a Look]
Castle: Yes, dear.

  --  The Wrong Stuff [7.16]
%
Castle: Space - the final frontier. These are the voyages of Castle and Beckett. Their ongoing mission: to explore strange, new motives; to seek out new witnesses, new suspects for murder; to boldly go... Oh, right over here.

  --  The Wrong Stuff [7.16]
%
Beckett: What are you doing?
Castle: Checking you for bites and scratches. Just making sure you didn't somehow get impregnated.
Beckett: If you think that's how I get pregnant, we need to talk.

  --  The Wrong Stuff [7.16]
%
[After Martha tells them of her decision to move out and leaves]
Beckett: I did not expect that.
Castle: Unexpected is her speciality

  --  The Wrong Stuff [7.16]
%
Beckett: Oh, God, shoot me now.
Castle: I'd rather not. What's up?
Beckett: Anson Klemp has just been promoted to captain. He's gonna run the 92.
Castle: Who is Anson Klemp, and why hasn't he changed his name?

  --  Hong Kong Hustle [7.17]
%
Castle: Hi, I'm Castle. We're partners. Actually, we're also married.
Zhang: Interesting arrangement.

  --  Hong Kong Hustle [7.17]
%
Beckett: Patterson Syndrome?
Castle: Yeah. Every time I write a bestseller, Patterson writes, like, six. It's maddening, but comparing myself to him does not make me write any faster.

  --  Hong Kong Hustle [7.17]
%
Beckett: So, uh, team leader, a wife, a mom. It's it a struggle to do it all?
Zhang: The trick is to not struggle, but to find balance. The moment you think it's a struggle, that's when you fall.

  --  Hong Kong Hustle [7.17]
%
Beckett: Oh my god, I haven't felt like this since I had pimples! I'm insecure!

  --  Hong Kong Hustle [7.17]
%
Castle: Believe me, Beckett has plenty of experience taking a bullet for other people doing stupid things. Hell, she's married to me.

  --  Hong Kong Hustle [7.17]
%
Beckett: Well, whatever's next, I don't want to compromise my priorities to get there. And I never want to be guilty of leaving behind what matters most.
Castle: You cannot leave behind what is always at your side.
Beckett: Hey... did you just make that up?
Castle: Yeah, why?
Beckett: You are so much better than Patterson.

  --  Hong Kong Hustle [7.17]
%
Beckett: What is this? What are you guys doing?
Castle: Ah. Well, Ryan was working all night, and he texted me.
Beckett: You texted Castle and not me?
Ryan: Well, when you have a crazy theory, you don't call the voice of reason.

  --  At Close Range [7.18]
%
Castle: Can I just say, I know I have occasionally theorized that a conspiracy was afoot...
Beckett: Occasionally?
Castle: But this time a conspiracy really is afoot!

  --  At Close Range [7.18]
%
Beckett: Backstabbing, adultery and betrayal. That is why I hate politics.

  --  At Close Range [7.18]
%
Beckett: You know, she's [Alexis] got an amazing brain. I mean, if she wanted to, she'd make an incredible lawyer.
Castle: Yeah, like I don't lose enough arguments to her already.

  --  Habeas Corpse [7.19]
%
Castle: Look, about the routine, I know you're worried, but-
Beckett: It's okay, Castle. It doesn't matter what we do.
Castle: Hey, that's the spirit!
Beckett: It gonna be a disaster.
Castle: That's not the spirit.

  --  Habeas Corpse [7.19]
%
Beckett: But, Castle, why would you be abducted on our wedding day and end up in Thailand?
Castle: Worst bachelor party ever?

  --  Sleeper [7.20]
%
[After being told to go home for being a possible target]
Beckett: ...Now, L.T. is gonna drive you home.
Castle: And if I refuse?
Beckett: Then he'll drive you home in handcuffs.
Castle: Just for the record, extremely bitter.

  --  Sleeper [7.20]
%
Castle: I am so sorry, Kate, for everything I put you through.
Beckett: Babe, it's not like you were partying in Thailand. You have the best excuse ever for missing our wedding. You were saving the world.

  --  Sleeper [7.20]
%
[While dealing with turbulence]
Alexis: There's nothing to worry about. It's just a little bumpy air, that's all it is.
Castle: Air, by nature, should not be bumpy.

  --  In Plane Sight [7.21]
%
Alexis: I'm always proud of you, Dad. But I've heard you speak a million times. I know what you're gonna say.
Castle: That is improbable.
Alexis: You'll say you don't believe in writer's block, that you wrote your first novel to impress a girl, that reading great writers inspires you, and drinking with them inspires you to beat them on the bestseller list.
Castle: Okay. Clearly, I need to develop some new material.

  --  In Plane Sight [7.21]
%
Captain Edmunds: Right now, with the air marshal unaccounted for, you're the closest thing we have to law enforcement on this plane.
Castle: Which in itself is cause for concern.

  --  In Plane Sight [7.21]
%
Castle: There's a snake on the mother-flying plane.

  --  In Plane Sight [7.21]
%
[To each other over the phone]
Beckett: You gotta be kidding me. The air marshal is dead?
Castle: Not just dead, but bonked on the head. Murdered. And there's more.
Beckett: There's more?
Castle: Kyle Ford's holster is empty. His gun is missing.
Beckett: Okay, so, uh, we have to assume that the killer is armed.
Castle: And they may have another agenda, taking hostages, hijacking the plane, FYI, this is not the relaxing London getaway I had planned.

  --  In Plane Sight [7.21]
%
[Remarking on Martha's opening line ritual]
Beckett: No, it's okay. I mean, we're gonna manage. It's just, your mom's kind of...
Castle: Annoying? Yeah, I know. Trust me, we're getting off easy. One time, her opening line was, "Come on, baby. I'll make it worth your while".
Beckett: [chuckling] Oh, I see what you mean.
Castle: Yeah. Most awkward parent-teacher conference ever.

  --  Dead from New York [7.22]
%
Beckett: Oh, come on, Castle. He was flirting with me. I can't control that.
Castle: But you were flirting right back.
Beckett: Yeah, but what was I supposed to do? He's Danny-freaking-Valentine!
[Castle gasps]

  --  Dead from New York [7.22]
%
[When Martha wants to drop out of the performance review]
Castle: Oh, absolutely not. You will not, and do you know why? Because you're a fighter. What have you always told me? No one will give you anything in this life. You must earn it. And look at you, almost 20 years later and you're back on Broadway? You have earned this.
Martha: I have, haven't I?
Castle: You have. Please don't let some idiot with a cell phone take that away from you.

  --  Dead from New York [7.22]
%
Esposito: Beckett, that was a badass takedown tonight on that show. It was strong, yet sexy.
Ryan: Yeah, Beckett, the camera really loves you.
Beckett: You guys, shut up, both of you.
Castle: What about me, guys? How did I look?
Esposito: Like you should stick to writing

  --  Dead from New York [7.22]
%
Beckett: What are you guys fighting about?
Ryan: Uh, the first case that Captain Montgomery partnered us on, 10 years ago today.
Castle: Really, it's you manniversary? And I didn't get you anything.
Esposito: There's still time.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
Beckett: Guys, is there any way to check police records from 30 years ago? See if there were any abandoned cars ticketed within a 50-mile radius of Hollander's Woods?
Esposito: Sure. We just have to call all the  municipal police departments in the area...
Ryan: And wait for them to stop laughing long enough to beg them to check their dusty storage rooms.
[Beat]
Ryan: You're serious?
Beckett: We need to know exactly what we're dealing with here. So, happy manniversary.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
Beckett: [After being verbally attacked and thrown out of a what she thought was a performance review for Captain] You're wrong, sir!
Supervisor: Excuse me?
Beckett: I said "you're wrong". In every case you have referenced, I have not only successfully brought the killer to justice, but I did so with the utmost respect for the law and for the department I represent.
And regarding my relationship with Mr. Castle, he has proven to be a brilliant partner, and he's always had my back. And as for his fictional representation of me, I'm proud to have been his inspiration, and I am proud to be his wife.
You asked, how do I expect to lead? By continuing to fight for what's right, not for what's easy. My job is to protect the citizens of New York and I will do it by doing my job better than anyone else and getting results. I don't cross the line; I put myself on it. And if you have any other questions, then you can ask the families of the victims that I have served! [turns to leave]
Supervisor 2: Detective Beckett, sit down. [She sits down] That was an impassionate and powerful response. In fact, that was exactly what we were hoping for.
Supervisor: This wasn't a performance review.
Beckett: Then why would you attack me like that?
Supervisor: We wanted to see if you can defend yourself. Kate, this was an audition.
Beckett: For what?
Supervisor 2: Your future! We were looking for someone like you, someone who is incorruptible, certifiable hero where the people can get behind. Kate, you're bigger than what you're doing now, you know it. It's why you went to D.C., it's why you took the captain's exam. You want a bigger station, we wanna give it to you. We think you have an amazing future.
Beckett: Doing what?
Supervisor: We'd like you to run for New York State Senate.
Beckett: [Gasping for air]

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
Castle: If Noah ends up walking, you're gonna have to have me committed.
......
Beckett: Listen, if after seven years of your crazy theories you haven't already been committed, then I think you're pretty safe.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
Holtzman: The danger of facing your demons is that, sometimes, the demons win.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
[Castle's speech at the award ceremony]
Castle: I've spent a lot of time over the past few days thinking about how I got here. The long hours. The blank pages. Most people think that writing is a solitary profession, that we spend our days in our imaginary worlds, fighting, loving, dying.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
But we don't do it alone. Because anything that's good in our writing comes from truth. And the truth is, I'm here because of the people in my life.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
Mother, you will always be a star in my eyes. And, Alexis, you amaze me every day. you two are my redheaded pillars of unconditional love.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
To my friends at the 12th Precinct, you let me in. Especially you two, Javier, Kevin. You made me your brother-in-arms, and I thank you for that.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
And, Kate. Seven years ago, I thought I would never write again, and then you walked through the door, and my whole world changed. You were right. You said I had no idea. But now I do. This is because of you. Because of us. Always.

  --  Hollander's Woods [7.23]
%
Kate: Babe, did you set your hair on fire again?
Castle:No, that was just one time. It's just that I'm so good looking I'm literally smoking hot.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Castle: You set up shop in my office behind my back and it's my fault?
Alexis: Exactly.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Assassin: Your earlier stuff was better. You got soft once you met the skirt.
Castle: Everyone's a critic.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Assassin: Most people react differently to a gun in their side.
Castle: Yeah, well this kind of thing happens to me often.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Bracken: Sixteen years Kate Beckett has been obsessed with solving her mother's murder. You really think she can turn off that kind of obsession?

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Kate: I wish that you were coming with me.
Castle: What am I going to do, sit outside your office and fetch you coffee?
Kate: Yeah, you're great at fetching. I've trained you well.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Hayley: Call me Hayley. I insist that anyone who's frisked me use my given name.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Castle: Name your price. Anything you say, I'll pay it. I just want my wife back.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Castle: If you wanted a binding agreement we should have pinky sweared.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Hayley: You really love her don't you?
Castle: Like a house on fire.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Bracken: No. No, no, no, no, forget it! I've got nothing to say to you!
Castle: Oh, tough! I know Beckett was here and I know why! So you're gonna call off your dogs right now.
Bracken: Or what? Are you gonna write something mean about me?
Castle: Or I'm gonna start a scholarship in your name and offer it to the children of the first inmate who shanks you in the prison laundry.
Bracken: You'll be wasting your money.
Castle: Oh, forgive me if I don't take your word for it.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Kate: I wish that you were coming with me.
Castle: What am I going to do, sit outside your office and fetch you coffee?
Kate: Yeah, you're great at fetching. I've trained you well.

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Kate: Babe, did you set your hair on fire again?
Castle: No, that was just one time. It's just that I'm so good looking I'm literally smoking hot. 

  --  "XY" [8.1]
%
Castle: Together we can figure this out. We can figure anything out, just like always.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Beckett: I didn't do this to hurt you, I did it to protect you.
Castle: Then why am I so angry?

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Castle: Do you have any idea how worried I was?
Beckett: Yeah, I do. I was gone for 36 hours. A year ago you were gone for eight weeks.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Beckett: I mean, what did you want me to do?
Castle: Tell me the truth.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Beckett: Castle, just shut up and kiss me.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Beckett: Look on the bright side, chicks dig scars.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Bracken: You may as well kill yourself right now Kate. You've stumbled onto something which is so over your head, I'm amazed you're still alive.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Beckett: Worst thing I thought I was going to be facing was working without Castle, and then you called.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Beckett: Trust me, a bullet's going to kill you long before hunger does.

  --  "XX" [8.2]
%
Castle: You're indoors and it's dark. Take off the sunglasses. You look stupid.

  --  "PhDead" [8.3]
%
Esposito: Including sending your daughter into a house full of drunken frat boys dressed like a slutty angel?

  --  "PhDead" [8.3]
%
Castle: What was the last book you read. Zen and the Art of Hazing Hipsters?

  --  "PhDead" [8.3]
%
Castle: You didn't really think you could Jump Street the prime suspect, did you?

  --  "PhDead" [8.3]
%
Castle: I didn't Houdini. I was Houdini'd

  --  "PhDead" [8.3]
%
Esposito: Nothing in life is permanent.

  --  "PhDead" [8.3]
%
Alexis: The blind priest just ran away.

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Castle: So if by ingratiate myself you mean dazzle her with my Sherlockian genius then yes, that's exactly what I mean.

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Alexis: Dad, when it comes to your sex life, how about we stick to the After School Special version.

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Castle: It's my pony. You can't pet it.

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Martha: Be honest with yourself and be honest with your husband.

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Martha: My son is a lot of things. Some of them good, some of them not so good but he is someone you can always count on and that is a rare thing, kiddo.

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Beckett: Martha, we're not getting a divorce.
Martha: Well, call me old fashioned but don't married couples live together?

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Beckett: It's complicated.
Martha: So were his last two divorces.

  --  "What Lies Beneath" [8.4]
%
Martha: Off, Off Broadway.
Richard: Mother, that was New Jersey.
Martha: Off, Off Broadway, as I said.

  --  "The Nose" [8.5]
%
Mia: Because we're awesome and you two suck. Next question.

  --  "The Nose" [8.5]
%
Castle: Here I am. Roguishly handsome and at your service. What do you need?

  --  "The Nose" [8.5]
%
Mia: Do you always eat kale for breakfast because that is just wrong.

  --  "The Nose" [8.5]
%
Ryan: Our witness is threatening to file a complaint against me for assault with a deadly odor. She says that I smell like soiled baby diapers and Javi's cologne is quote, "satan's butt sweat."

  --  "The Nose" [8.5]
%
Slaugher: I lost my wife because I wasn't man enough to put her needs ahead of mine. Don't make the same mistake.

  --  "Cool Boys" [8.6]
%
Slaugher: You're too smart to be talking this stupid, Sherlock. If you really love that broad, you figure out what the problem is and you do something.

  --  "Cool Boys" [8.6]
%
Castle: Flowers are a nice thank you gift. A giant Rambo knife, that's psychotic.

  --  "Cool Boys" [8.6]
%
Martha: Is that the old friend who almost got you killed a few years ago?
Castle: Yeah, like six times.

  --  "Cool Boys" [8.6]
%
Castle: This separation thing is getting really old.

  --  "Cool Boys" [8.6]
%
Castle: Kate, I have never given up hope, not since the day we met and that will never change until you tell me it should.
Beckett: Then don't change, ever.

  --  "The Last Seduction" [8.7]
%
Castle: No relationship can survive secrets or lies.

  --  "The Last Seduction" [8.7]
%
Castle: They've been through way too much together to give up on what they have.
Beckett: You're a wise man Castle, with a big heart and you're rather good looking too.
Castle: You might want to pace yourself with the flattery. You've got a whole dinner to get through.

  --  "The Last Seduction" [8.7]
%
Castle: Looks like someone did not enjoy getting screwed, out of their money that is.

  --  "The Last Seduction" [8.7]
%
Ryan: You're supposed to be our buffer. Buff!

  --  "The Last Seduction" [8.7]
%
Ryan: Castle, nothing you do is little.

  --  "The Last Seduction" [8.7]
%
Beckett: It's all come crashing down around my ears and I've got no one to blame but myself.

  --  "Mr. & Mrs. Castle" [8.8]
%
Castle: The fact that you even think that breaks my heart. I would walk into a tornado for you, Kate.
Beckett: And I would die if I lost you.

  --  "Mr. & Mrs. Castle" [8.8]
%
Castle: You know when I hung up my shingle as a P.I., I knew I'd have to follow some wives, I just never thought it would be my own.

  --  "Mr. & Mrs. Castle" [8.8]
%
Castle: The fact that you even think that breaks my heart. I would walk into a tornado for you, Kate.
Beckett: And I would die if I lost you.

  --  "Mr. & Mrs. Castle" [8.8]
%
Castle: You want to know what hurts the most? You could have come to me with everything. Broken us up just like you did only it would have been a cover and together, in secret we could have taken this guy down but that thought never even occurred to you because deep down inside you like being broken and you need this obsession and no matter what I do I can't change that, only you can, Kate.

  --  "Mr. & Mrs. Castle" [8.8]
%

Esposito: So you're going full hipster now.
Ryan: Have you started jarring artisanal pickles yet?

  --  "Mr. & Mrs. Castle" [8.8]
%
Ryan: I believe her exact words were, "Sure, maybe we'll get lucky and Castle will get shot."

  --  "Tone Death" [8.9]
%
Castle: You want to know what hurts the most? You could have come to me with everything. Broken us up just like you did only it would have been a cover and together, in secret we could have taken this guy down but that thought never even occurred to you because deep down inside you like being broken and you need this obsession and no matter what I do I can't change that, only you can, Kate.

  --  "Tone Death" [8.9]
%
Marcus: This is why I love the 12th precinct. You guys never let me down.

  --  "Witness For the Prosecution" [8.10]
%
Kate: Now Rick, be charming but not too charming.
Castle: That's like asking Superman not to be too super.

  --  "Witness For the Prosecution" [8.10]
%
Castle: I am so sick of people pushing me away for my safety.

  --  "Dead Red" [8.11]
%
Castle: This novel writes itself.
Ryan: Then tell us what happens next.
Castle: I have no idea. That's what makes it so good.

  --  "Dead Red" [8.11]
%
Castle: You know Beckett asked for some time so I'm just giving it to her every day. Sometime twice.

  --  "Dead Red" [8.11]
%
Alexis: I can't leave you alone for five minutes.
Castle: Does this mean no hug?

  --  "The Blame Game" [8.12]
%
Castle: While I do love kissing you Beckett, it's just a little creepy when you do it in front of a dead body. It's inappropriate.

  --  "And Justice For All" [8.13]
%
Castle: I didn't open this place to make money. I opened it for the exciting cases.

  --  "And Justice For All" [8.13]
%
Castle: I already work with the greatest detective in the world.

  --  "The G.D.S." [8.14]
%
Castle: I am your father and from the day you came into this world it's been my job to protect you.

  --  "The G.D.S." [8.14]
%
Hayley: It might be for the best. Ignorance is bliss.
Castle: No, ignorance is hell.

  --  "The G.D.S." [8.14]
%
Castle: I'm not making anymore decisions concerning LokSat without Beckett.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.15]
%
Beckett: How did we end up here again? You lie to protect me. I lie to protect you.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.15]
%
Beckett: I have been at the edge of that map and monsters lie there.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.15]
%
Beckett: Every record falls in the end.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.15]
%
Castle: "For Richard - Without your constant stumbles in life the advice in this book would not have been possible." Constant stumbles?
Martha: Let's not make this about you.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.15]
%
Ryan: I just called in sick. Let's go get really drunk.
Esposito: Damn straight.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.16]
%
Esposito: I know that you had a tough go when you were little but sooner or later you've got to stop blaming your childhood. At some point, when you choose wrong over right that's on you.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.16]
%
Esposito: Your boy toy hits like a little bitch.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.16]
%
Ryan: Turns out that Chicken, Chicken, Chicken is bankrupt, bankrupt, bankrupt.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.16]
%
Esposito: Alright, hurry up. Let's just get this over with.
Sonia: Didn't I used to say that to you whenever you got frisky at night?

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.16]
%
Castle: Contrary to what you three have led me to believe, those women's prisons are nothing like the late night skin-a-max movies.

  --  "Heartbreaker" [8.16]
%  
Beckett: That my man would stop talking about being some skeezy blonde's master and start talking about taking his wife to bed.
Castle: Oh well, I don't need a genie to grant that wish.

  --  "Death Wish" [8.17]
%
Beckett: Time machine?
Castle: Only to go back and fall in love with you all over again.

  --  "Death Wish" [8.17]
%
Castle: I have no need for genies because I already have everything I could ever wish for.
Beckett: Right back at you, handsome.

  --  "Death Wish" [8.17]
%
Beckett: So after eight years some of my common sense has finally rubbed off on you.

  --  "Death Wish" [8.17]
%
Beckett: Can you make sure he gets dibs on the first rub, please?

  --  "Death Wish" [8.17]
%
Castle: Got a crime scene right here. My mother just killed the mood.

  --  "Death Wish" [8.17]
%
Castle: As long as I'm with you, I'll go anywhere.

  --  "Dead Again" [8.19]
%
Alan: I'm Boring Man, except for the contract out on my life.

  --  "Dead Again" [8.19]
%
Castle: The victim's not going to get any deader.

  --  "Dead Again" [8.19]
%
Castle: But it was a Hollywood promise; not worth a damn.

  --  "Much Ado About Murder" [8.20]
%
Castle: I don't think date night counts when it's a candlelit dinner with the Butcher of Guadalajara.

  --  "Much Ado About Murder" [8.20]
%
Beckett: You're such a good son.
Castle: And you're such a good everything.

  --  "Much Ado About Murder" [8.20]
%
Ryan: Man, I hate walls of crazy.

  --  "Hell to Pay" [8.21]
%
Ryan: Well I will be sure to cross reference Shaw's visitor against the list of fallen angels.

  --  "Hell to Pay" [8.21]
%
Beckett: You know as well as I do that when the lights go out, bad things happen.

  --  "Hell to Pay" [8.21]
%
Esposito: I don't care if it's protected by the Hulk, we're going to tear this place apart.

  --  "Crossfire" [8.22]
%
Castle: Beckett makes me laugh. She challenges me. I became a better man.

  --  "Crossfire" [8.22]
%
Beckett: I need a miracle, guys.
Ryan: Okay, you got it.
Esposito: One miracle coming up.

  --  "Crossfire" [8.22]
%
Ryan: You can fire us both for insubordination if you want, but we got this.

  --  "Crossfire" [8.22]
%
Beckett: You shouldn't have told them.
Esposito: Yeah, you should have.

  --  "Crossfire" [8.22]
%
Vikram: The Big Bad Wolf. The person behind Senator Bracken, Allison Hyde, the hit squads and every terrible thing that's happened to me and Beckett in the past nine months.

  --  "Crossfire" [8.22]
%
Castle: Oh my God, could my ex-wife be LokSat? Because in a lot of ways that could make a lot of sense.

  --  "Crossfire" [8.22]
%
